One way ticket
by Morbidlyartistic
Summary: Conlon...Spot Conlon. was the first thing he said to me. He saved me in every way he could, but I was never able to save him.
1. Brooklyn

**One way ticket**

_I had sunken to my lowest in an alley during a New York winter night. The wind made the weather below zero and I slowly rocked back and forth. I tried to get the feeling back into my legs but I soon gave up. I lifted my eyes to stare at a dirty newspaper lying in a puddle in front of me. That was the furthest I could see without moving my head. I knew at that moment that I was going to die. There was no doubt about it. I had nothing to keep me warm but my arms which were resting limp in my lap. I was afraid that if I closed my eyes I would never wake up. My gaze wondered from my lap back to the newspaper which now had two feet standing on top of it. I used my last bit of strength to lift my head and look at the persons face. All I saw was a glare and then I blacked out. _

Chapter One- Brooklyn

I hesitantly opened my eyes to find myself staring up at a wooden ceiling. Slowly I pushed my self up and realized I was sitting in bed under blankets. I took this time to take in my surroundings. It seemed I was in someone's room. Things you would think to find in vaudeville theatres and opera houses were scattered around. There was only one window and all I saw were buildings and water. The sound of shoes hitting the wooden floor brought me back to reality and I jerked my head towards the door. My eyes met a pair of brilliant blue ones that were narrowed.

"Conlon…Spot Conlon." Was the first thing he said to me.

"Brown...Sherry Brown." I replied. The voice I heard, I knew wasn't mine and it was only followed by coughs. Once I was done and controlled my strained breathing I looked back up towards the door. He was still staring at me and I felt transparent, as if he could see right through me and knew exactly why I was sitting in that alley dying. I noticed one thing though; he did not look at me with pity like others would. Not even an ounce of concern, just with an almost knowingness. I looked away not wanting to meet his gaze that felt like he was accusing me. After a few more minutes it got the best of me. "Stop staring at me!" I snapped. He smirked and I heard him walk closer. I looked back over to see him standing next to the bed. For the first time I noticed the black gold tipped cane he held clenched in his hand. "What's that for?" I asked trying to calm myself down.

"It's to emphasize my authority." He replied his voice just as quiet as mine.

"Where am I?" I finally asked hating awkward silences and I knew we were about to share one.

"The Brooklyn lodging house." I pushed the covers back and the moment I placed my feet on the floor I met the ground. I moaned with pain and embarrassment. I had just met this guy and he already made me feel vulnerable and intimidated. "Youse sprained your ankle." He finally said with the same calmness he had earlier.

"Why didn't you tell me!" I yelled. I felt a hand grab my arm and roughly pull me up. He didn't let go once I was standing upright and tightened his grip.

"I saved ya life; don't talk to me like that." My breath caught in my throat as I stared into his eyes and nodded my understanding. He let go of my arm and I felt has if it would bruise now. "Sit." He instructed and I followed his orders. Then I noticed my wrapped up ankle.

"Did you-"

"Yeah." He didn't even let me finish my sentence.

"Thanks." He shrugged and walked over to a box on the floor. It looked like a suitcase and he pulled out some clothes.

"Here." He threw them at me and I probably looked like an idiot trying to catch them. He just smirked again and walked back over to the door. "Once ya done come downstairs." With that he shut the door and I heard his footsteps die away. I was grateful to him for more than just saving my life but for not asking me why I had been in that alley that night. Although a small part of me wished he hadn't had shown up because I would be dead by now.

After getting changed into what seemed to be his clothes I limped downstairs. I only saw him sitting at a long wooden table staring at a row of cards. I stumbled over to the table and sat down next to him.

"Are you a-"

"Newsie? Yeah." I tried to hold back my anger but I didn't do so well.

"Stop cutting me off dammit!" I yelled again immediately biting my lip. He turned his head towards me but instead of a glare all I saw was a smirk. "I mean why do you keep cutting me off?"

"I want ta see how far your temper goes." I narrowed my eyes.

"Why?" I asked defensively.

"No reason Vaudeville."

"Well obviously…wait, did you just call me Vaudeville?" I stopped noticing the name he had given me.

"That's right."

"What the hell? Why?"

"I found ya near a vaudeville theatre, so I decided ta call ya that."

"What, you incorporating me into your little street rat society?" at that moment I heard the bitterness in my tone and his eyes narrowed once more. He dropped the cards he was holding in his hand and grabbed the collar of my shirt.

"Don't youse eva call us street rats again, ya heah!" he yelled shaking me a little. I nodded, "I would soak ya but youse wearin' my favorite shirt and I don't wanna get blood on it." He let go of my shirt and picked back up his cards.

"You hit girls?" I asked wondering when I was going to get the clue to just shut up.

"I haven't so far, wanna be the foist?" I shook my head and he nodded. "Thought so." He paused for a second placing a black eight over a red nine. "Oh, an' to answer your question about youse becoming a newsie, no." even though I didn't want to become a newsie I felt offended by this.

"Why not?"

"You wouldn't be able to handle it."

"You don't think I can sell newspapers?"

"Yeah, an' theres more to being a newsie than newspapers." I laughed.

"Like what?" he turned to me and caught my gaze once again. I felt myself freeze and stare back.

"Survival." I was grounded by that statement and was silent until he spoke again. "And by what I saw last night you can't even handle that." No reply. He just smirked. "Do you wanna be a newsie?"

"I don't know."

"Got anything else ya can do?"

"What do you mean?"

"What, ya stupid? Got a home to go back to or something?" I shook my head. He pulled all the cards in and stacked them neatly in front of him. "Well then, seems like newsie is the only profession I see fit for ya."

"I thought you said I wouldn't be able to handle it?"

"Youse can't, but I'm in the mood for some entertainment." I glared at him as he stood up. "I'm goin' to Manhattan, the rest of 'em will be back soon, so you can stay heah." He pulled a grey cap out of his back pocket and pulled it on his head. "Don't say anything stupid to 'em." He demanded pointing his cane at me. "They aren't as nice as me." He pushed the cane into a loop on his pants.

"You're supposed to be nice?"

"No, but you've neva met Manhattan."

"Is that another nickname for someone?" he shook his head but never replied. I watched him leave and I busied myself with the cards.

--

The sun had fallen behind the river and only darkness prevailed. I sat looking around the empty warehouse. It was almost creepy being there by your self sitting in a big empty room. The fact that it was a warehouse in Brooklyn only made it creepier. When I was just about to run out and find my way back to my previous destination before Spot found me, I heard loud voices outside. I waited hesitantly as the voices came closer and I saw people enter the room I was in. They seemed not to notice me until one young boy pointed me out, soon after; the two older boys looked at me as more filed in after them.

"Who are youse?" one asked folding his arms across his chest. I jumped a little at the harshness in his tone but I tried to keep my composure.

"Sherry." I replied glancing from one boy to the next. He smirked and moved closer to me. My heart started to race and I felt like he could sense my fear, because the smirk turned into a full out smile.

"What ya doin' heah?" he asked his voice softer though filled with intention. I backed up when he sat down next to me but was stopped by his friend who sat behind me.

"Spot told me to wait here." I hoped none of the fear I felt leaked out into my voice. He laughed and ran his hand along my arm. I jerked it back and narrowed my eyes. "Don't touch me." I said my stubbornness returning and my fear momentarily forgotten. The boy looked to his friend who was laughing behind me. I turned my head slightly and looked up at the other boys. Most of them were walking upstairs minding their own business and some were watching waiting to see what happened.

"Doll…" I looked back down at the boy talking to me. "I can touch ya when I want to." I shook my head and attempted to get up, but the boy behind me grabbed my forearms and pulled me back down.

"I said don't touch me!" I yelled trying to push the boy off of me. The one who seemed to like talking so much grabbed my waist and pulled me towards him. I screamed and tried everything I could to get him away from me.

"Aw, don't fight it doll face, just go along wit it." the boys laughed.

"You tell 'er Striker." His friend behind me replied. Striker, now that I found out his name, pulled me upwards and pushed me against a wall and started to kiss me. Some part of me had thought that newsies weren't supposed to be like this. Apparently they were like every other man out there on the street. How could Spot defend them and say they were not street rats? By their behavior they were, and I hated them. Not one man should ever take advantage of a woman like this, it was wrong and immoral, and the newsies knew nothing of that. When I had pushed Striker away a little I noticed Spot standing at the door staring at us.

"Spot!" I gasped hoping he would help me. Striker jerked back and looked towards the door. He seemed almost fearful of the boy who had just entered. I glanced between them and when Striker nodded and smiled back at me I knew they had exchanged some sort of message. He leaned in again to start the struggle between us. "Spot…help me." I said still trying to fight off Striker but getting tired. I watched him shrug and take off his hat running his hand through his hair.

"I can't help ya all the time." I heard Striker laugh under his breath. My eyes widened at the thought I may lose this battle. Again Striker attacked me and I started to give in knowing I had no chance.

"Fight 'em Vaudeville…" I heard Spot from behind us.

"I can't." I thought to myself.

"Yes you can." He replied almost like he had known exactly what I was thinking. I closed my eyes and opened them again with a new determination. When Striker forced me to kiss him I bit his lip. He jerked back and I saw some blood run out the side of his mouth. I pulled my arm away from his grip which had loosened and slapped him across the face. He let me go completely and I watched as he stumbled back. My breath was coming out in gasps and I pulled the shirt closed that he had started to unbutton. I turned to Spot who nodded and turned towards the stairs. "No one else touch 'er…for the rest of the night." I looked up at him and our eyes met briefly. "Vaudeville come on." He commanded making his way up the stairs. Striker wiped the blood away from his mouth and smiled.

"Maybe we'll finish this next time doll face." He whispered as I passed by. The other boys around him laughed and whistled as I kept walking.

"What dogs…" I thought. Spot was waiting at the top of the stairs for me and I followed him the rest of the way to the room I had woken up in earlier today. Once we were in the room I exploded on him.

"Why didn't you help me?!" I yelled glaring at him. He turned to me his eyes narrowed as well. It was obvious he was contemplating whether or not to hurt me for yelling at him.

"You need ta loin to take care of your self." He replied his voice stern. I scoffed and placed my hands on my hips.

"What? Oh yeah, like I could really do that in the street."

"And why not?" he asked starting to unbutton his shirt.

"Are you getting undressed in front of me!" my eyes went wide and he shrugged.

"Maybe, this is my room." I threw my hands up in the air and turned around to not look at him.

"Well to answer the question prior before your indecency, what if the guy had a knife or something?" I heard him laugh behind me.

"Loin to fight…lesson numba one Vaudeville." I spun around pointing at him.

"Stop calling me that ridiculous name!" he grabbed my wrist and pulled me into him. All my words disappeared when I noticed that we were so close. My cheeks grew red and I looked down.

"Don't tell me what to do, and stop yellin' it won't make ya point, nor will it make me stop callin' ya a betta name then the one youse got." I felt his grip tighten. "I don't know anything about you, but at some point in everyone's lives we gotta loin to take care of ourselves, because not everyone has a savior." I nodded. "This is New York, not heaven, things like what happened to you downstairs happen all the time in these streets, but sometimes the goil don't get away, sometimes the guy does have a knife and he ain't afraid to use it. There are people Vaudeville, that like to see other people die and suffer, and there are people who won't save you if they notice someone hoiting you. So my advice is to loin to take care of your self, because your self is all you got." I was silenced by his speech and I nodded again. Slowly I looked up into his blue eyes and we stood there for a few seconds before he let me go. We were quiet as he finished what he was doing and pushed me away from the door. "Youse can sleep heah tonight see you in the mornin', and I mean the mornin'." He closed the door behind him and I fell onto the bed. What was I still doing here? Was my last thought before I closed my eyes and drifted into a deep sleep.

**A/n: Hey guys. This is my new story, and its in 1899. So tell me if you think I should continue. so please review and tell me what you think.**


	2. Lesson one

Chapter two- Lesson One

I felt cold water splash across my face and yelled. I had lived in the lodging house for a couple weeks now. Slowly I had grown used to the boys I was around and stopped being jumpy, worried, and bipolar.

Last night Spot had noticed that my ankle was healed and made a comment about me going to work today. I didn't take him seriously since most of the things Spot said were sarcastic.

"Get up." Was the only reply I received. I opened my eyes and glared at Spot who was sifting through his suitcase again.

"Why couldn't you just shake me awake like a normal person?" he shrugged and threw a new shirt at me.

"I'm not a normal person." I examined the shirt and looked back at him.

"This is a pretty nice shirt." It was a dark blue and seemed like he kept it as clean as possible.

"I know."

"Why would you let me wear it then?" he shook his head and pulled a beat up black cap from the pocket of his pants.

"Put your hair up in this." I caught it and smiled at how good my catching skills were getting, since Spot could never pass me anything.

"Why?" he rolled his eyes and opened the door.

"Stop asking stupid questions and just do what I say." With that he closed the door shut leaving me to get ready. I was still not used to wearing pants but I knew eventually they would become much more comfortable. When Spot had found me I was in the usual attire of a dress. Now that his clothes were the only things I had to wear I guess I didn't have much of a choice. I buttoned up the shirt and pushed my golden locks up under my new hat. There was no mirror in Spot's room but I assumed I probably looked more like a boy. I walked down the stairs and found Spot sitting at the table waiting for me. He looked me over and pulled the cap down further over my eyes. "You still look too feminine." I sighed.

"Excuse me for being a girl."

"You're excused." I gave up on defending myself, Spot shot me down anyway. He stepped back after his few minor adjustments and nodded. "Alright." Then grabbed his cane and hat and proceeded towards the door.

"Everyone else is already gone?" I inquired following him out of the warehouse and into the early morning sunlight.

"Yeah, they're sellin'."

"What?"

"Sellin' papes."

"Papes?"

"You know newspapers."

"Oh yeah." We walked in silence until we got to the Brooklyn Bridge. "Where are we going?"

"Manhattan."

"Why?" I started to panic.

"Why not?"

"Well, don't you need to sell?"

"Yeah, and I'm doing it in Manhattan today."

"Why?"

"Stop asking questions."

"Spot…" he started across the bridge and I followed helplessly.

"It's easier for begginas to start there that's why." I then realized that he wanted me to learn how to sell newspapers. I guess I had forgotten about that since I had spent most of my days in the lodging house.

"I don't wanna learn how to sell newspapers." I said.

"Okay." he responded monotonously and I knew that I hadn't changed his mind. I sighed and hoped that I wouldn't run into what I was trying to avoid the night Spot discovered me. That wouldn't just cause problems for me, but it would cause problems for Spot.

"Spot!" He stopped and turned towards a tall blonde boy who seemed to have been waiting for him. Compared to most of the other newsies I had seen he seemed more mature and able to handle a lot more responsibility. He resembled a cowboy with the red bandana tied around his neck and the western style hat hanging down his back.

"Jacky-boy." They spit shook and I expressed how disgusted I was by this. The boy Spot addressed as 'Jacky-boy' turned to me and gave me an odd look.

"Who's this?" he asked looking me up and down almost suspiciously.

"Vaudeville." Jacky-boy began to laugh.

"I didn't pick the name so don't laugh at me, laugh at his idiocy." I pointed towards Spot who turned to me with narrowed eyes. Jacky-boy stopped laughing abruptly at my reply and studied Spot's reaction.

"What did I say about your comments?" he asked stepping closer to me and jabbing his cane into my stomach. I wrapped my arms around myself and backed away from him.

"I'm sorry." I quickly replied. Hesitantly he seemed to stop walking towards me and thought twice about putting me back in my place. He turned back to Jacky-boy and sighed.

"She doesn't know how to keep 'er mouth shut yet." He nodded and glanced at me.

"That's obvious." Then with another chuckle he lightened the mood. "So what can I do for ya Spot?" he inquired as they began walking. I followed behind but not closely.

"I need to take care of things, an' I don't want her in Brooklyn sellin' so…can you take care of 'er?" I overheard their conversation and was offended quickly by how Spot seemed to talk about me.

"I can take care of myself!" I interrupted catching up with them. Spot turned around and looked at me skeptically.

"That's a good one." He replied and Jacky-boy smiled.

"I can!"

"I don't care, what I say goes." I crossed my arms over my chest and glared.

"What's so great about Manhattan anyway?"

"You'll be safer heah."

"No place is safer than another in New York."

"She's right ya know…Spot." I looked at the boy who seemed to show that he could think for himself. Spot glared at him and turned back to me.

"Well in my head it is, now stay heah for the rest of the day, I don't want you comin' over to Brooklyn until I come an' get you." I rolled my eyes and let them finish what they had been talking about before. Once again Spot spit shook with him and made his way back the way we had come. Before passing me he stopped. "Don't start any trouble."

"What if I did?" I asked ignorantly.

"I'll hoit you." I believed him. He disappeared and I looked over at Jacky-boy who had been watching the whole time. After a few seconds he motioned for me to follow him. I obeyed and walked next to him.

"So, how did you get involved with Spot?" he asked. I shrugged.

"It doesn't matter." He smirked.

"Aren't we defiant?" I tried to keep myself from smiling.

"So…is your nickname Jacky-boy?" he laughed.

"No, it's Cowboy, or just Jack."

"How did **you** get involved with Spot?"

"I'm the leader of Manhattan; he's the leader of Brooklyn."

"No other story?" he shrugged.

"You lookin' for one?" I shook my head even though it would have been interesting. I would have liked to find out what brought these kids to the streets.

When we had stopped talking I thought about how lucky I had been so far. I hadn't seen anyone I recognized and no one had seen me. Plus Spot was gone and he wouldn't find out anything. Though there was a slight chance that maybe Jack would if something happened. We came up to a gate and walked into a line of other newsboys.

"Cowboy…where were ya?" one asked a cigar hanging from his mouth. Jack turned to him and gestured towards me. The boy stared at me and then looked back at Jack. "Okay…that gesture doesn't explain anything."

"This is Vaudeville, Spot couldn't handle 'er, so he dumped her off here." I glared at Jack at his introduction the boy laughed and smiled towards me.

"Oh, hey."

"Hello and you are?" I asked.

"Racetrack." I nodded already used to the nicknames. "How did ya get the name Vaudeville?" he said turning and moving up in the endless line.

"I don't know."

"Spot named her." Jack cut in. Racetrack smiled and stopped talking to us after that. Once Jack bought us both papers, he had 50 and I had 20, he stopped at the bottom of the wooden steps. "Oi! Pirate!" he motioned towards someone who was standing with a group of boys. Pirate quickly approached us and I noticed that it was a girl. I wasn't sure at first since she had disguised herself well.

"Yeah?" He pointed towards me.

"She's new; teach her the ropes, an' the other things that are best loined quickly." She laughed and nodded.

"I got it." He smiled.

"I'll leave it to you guys to introduce yourselves." He walked away and met up with a boy that seemed nicely dressed and a young child. I turned back to the girl who was staring at me intently.

"Pirate." She said even though I had figured since Jack had called her over.

"Vaudeville." I answered realizing it was best I use my nickname. She shifted her papers under another arm and spit in her hand. When she extended it to me I backed away looking disgusted. "I don't do that." She stared at me and sighed pulling her hand back and wiping it on her pants.

"Loin to." Was all she said as we started to follow the crowd out of the gates. The second they had set foot outside the distribution office they started screaming out headlines. I felt the need to cover my ears but restrained myself. "Well…foist things foist, lie." We walked slowly and she pointed to a headline on the paper. "No one is gonna buy with some lame headline like this." She pulled her cap down more and held the paper up in the air. Changing her voice she called out a headline but it wasn't the one written down. I watched intrigued as a man came up paid her a penny and left with his paper he bought on a lie. She turned towards me and smiled showing me the shiny penny. "See?" I nodded.

"But why disguise yourself as a guy?"

"People don't find it acceptable for a goil to take a man's job and live with a whole bunch of boys, I guess it's unusual in society's eyes, an' the people you want to buy are the people that think that…some could care less." She opened another paper and I could tell she was skimming its contents. "Plus there are men out heah that would take advantage of ya." I believed her at this for I had my experience with Striker about what men thought of the use for women. While Pirate was searching for a new lie to conjure I took a good look at her. She was a very beautiful girl. Strands of her black hair were hanging out of her cap and her emerald green eyes were moving from side to side scanning the words on the paper. I'm sure that if she dressed more like a female she would be drop dead gorgeous. "What?" I then noticed she had caught me staring.

"Oh nothing." I replied turning back to my papers and trying to think of something good to scream. I had decided on using the same headline Pirate had just used but make up my own lie. Imitating her I changed my voice and called out my headline. After screaming it a couple times a woman approached me.

"Two." She said smiling at me. I nodded and handed them to her. After placing them under her arm she passed me two pennies. I smiled at Pirate once the lady had walked away. She returned it and pushed me along.

"Never linger long, some people realize youse lied, an' they ain't too happy." I nodded and we moved quickly. "You were lucky…that she wanted two, some are neva that lucky on their foist try."

"I'm sure."

By the afternoon I had sold only ten of my twenty papers. I was a little disappointed but Pirate assured me that not everyone wanted to buy papers. She had taken fifty and said she had only sold twenty. I thought that was amazing but she had shrugged; I don't think she took compliments well.

"We all meet at Tibby's around noonish."

"Everyday?" I asked following her.

"Well not everyday, but most of the time." She pushed open the door and we entered where I saw everyone sitting in random places. Pirate headed for a table in the back and I followed at her heels. I only recognized Racetrack who seemed to be telling a funny story because everyone was laughing and he was talking enthusiastically.

"Hey guys." Pirate said pulling out a chair and sitting next to a boy with a patch. He had shaggy blonde hair and was very handsome for a newsie.

"You can sit heah." Racetrack said pointing to an empty seat next to him. I smiled and took it. "So how did ya do?" he asked when I was sitting down. I assumed he had finished the story.

"Good." I replied looking at everyone else. He noticed and chuckled.

"Oh yeah, guys, introduce yourselves or something." I was somewhat grateful that Racetrack had said something but no one seemed happy to follow his request. They didn't say anything and sat in silence making me feel uncomfortable. Pirate rolled her eyes and pointed next to her.

"This is Blink, an' next to him is his best friend Mush, an' beside him is Skittery, an' of course you know Race." I nodded. Mush had light brown colored skin and curly brown hair. I briefly wondered if he was an immigrant but I didn't ask since that would have been rude. Skittery was handsome as well with messy dark brown hair and a grim expression. When the introductions were finished I felt like running off and telling Spot about my day like a child telling their parents. I smiled at my thought and decided it best to obey Spot's orders.

Lunch passed quickly but by the end I was laughing and felt like I had been accepted into the Manhattan family. "Come on." Pirate pulled on my sleeve and I waved goodbye to everyone.

"They were nice." I said as we exited the restaurant.

"Yeah." We were silent. I wanted to ask Pirate why she was a newsie but I thought better of it. Once she was finished reading another newspaper we continued on our route around the city. By sun down we had finished selling all our papes and I had money in my pockets. We walked back to the Manhattan lodging house; Jack was waiting for me at the entrance.

"Hey." He said as we approached him. "Thanks Pirate for takin' care of her." She smiled and patted me on the shoulder.

"Sure." She began to make her way into the lodging house.

"Pirate!" I called; she turned around and looked at me. I spit in my hand and extended it towards her. "See ya tomorrow maybe?" she laughed and did the same then shook my hand. I thought it was still disgusting but I felt like I owed her something and that was the only thing I could think of. After our exchange she disappeared through the doorway. Jack smiled at me with respect.

"What made ya do that?" he asked remembering my disgusted look earlier that day. I shrugged and turned around. He didn't press me any further and we waited in silence until I saw Spot.

"Wow, I'm surprised to see Vaudeville alive an' in one piece." He commented spit shaking with Jack. Jack laughed and nodded.

"I share in your surprise." I rolled my eyes at them both but didn't say a word.

"No comment? What did Manhattan do?" Spot asked smirking at me. I walked away. "Wait a minute Vaudeville." I stopped but my back was still turned. I heard them talking and then after about five minutes Spot stood next to me. "Let's go." We walked together and the uneasiness I had felt about returning to Manhattan and the newsies disappeared. No one had seen me and I was truly happy that my wonderful day hadn't been ruined. What I didn't know was that someone had indeed seen me, and followed me, but had only done so in Brooklyn. My crime committed in Manhattan had not inspired them to search for me there, for they only saw me run to Brooklyn. To this day I still don't know how Spot knew I was running from something or someone but from that day on I only sold in Manhattan.


	3. Confrontations with the past

**Disclaimer: I don't own the beautiful newsies. Only the creepy Slims, his boss, and other guy, and of course wonderful Vaudeville! **

Chapter three- Confrontations with the Past

I was up before most of the boys. I wasn't sure if Spot was awake or not but I didn't care. Slowly I made my way downstairs and outside. The sun was coming up and the beams of light reflected off of the water. It was the most peaceful I felt in awhile and I wished I could have enjoyed it for the whole day.

"What you doin' up?" I heard someone ask from behind me. Immediately I recognized the speaker as Spot and didn't bother turning around.

"I don't know, what about you?" there was no reply but I knew he was smirking. He stood next to me and stared out across the water. We were silent and I wondered if he was thinking the same things I was thinking.

"These are the moments you live for." I jumped a little. I hadn't expected him to talk and I had almost slipped off into my own reality.

"I wouldn't expect Spot Conlon to say something like that." I glanced at him out of the corner of my eye he was smiling. "You don't agree?" he shrugged and began walking forward. Hesitantly I followed waiting for him to tell me to leave him alone.

"You don't know me well." I nodded. We continued walking until we reached the docks. I listened as our shoes made a loud noise as we walked across the wooden boards. We both stopped at the edge and I sat down hanging my feet off the side. Spot followed my lead and he leaned back on his hands. Another content silence fell around us and I pulled my knees up resting my chin on top of them. It was odd being with Spot at this moment; I had never felt this way around another person. I turned my head and stared at him. The sun was higher in the sky and it illuminated his face more. He seemed relaxed, as if he wasn't living the life he was living in. I noticed more how good looking he was and smiled.

"What?" he asked. I quickly turned my head back to the water and watched the waves push against the wooden posts.

"Nothing."

"Yeah okay." I looked up with a defensive expression.

"Don't believe me!?"

"No." he took a deep breath and let it out. "Not at all." With that he got up and started back towards the warehouse. I jumped up and jogged slightly to catch up.

"Well, I better be going to Manhattan."

"Yeah." He replied before he turned and went in an opposite direction from me. I rolled my eyes. Spot Conlon was always mysterious, at one moment you may think you know something about him, that he's let you into his life and then the next you'll know nothing and never had known anything. I had never met anyone like him, and the way he was attracted me more to him. Maybe that was the same reason that people listened to him, respected him, and why girls also liked him. Or it could have just been my opinion, and they never counted for much.

"Mornin' Vaudeville." I heard Race say behind me as I stepped into line. I turned to him and smiled.

"Back at ya Race." He started to chew on his cigar.

"Youse sellin' with Pirate again?" he asked. I nodded. "Probably." I bought my papers and made my way down the wooden steps. I scanned the crowd of other newsies for Pirate but she was nowhere to be seen.

"Vaudville!" I turned to see Jack Kelly approach me with two other boys. Both I had seen before. The oldest had brown curly hair and blue eyes; again much more nicely dressed than the other newsies. The youngest boy had features similar to the older boy except he had brown eyes instead of blue. "This is Davey and Les, my sellin' partners." Jack pointed to both boys.

"Nice to meet you." I said smiling at them. The older boy who I assumed was Davey since his name was mentioned first returned my smile.

"Well I came to tell ya that Pirate ain't sellin' today." I quickly became concerned.

"Why not?" I asked. Jack shrugged. "I just left the lodgin' house and she told me to tell you, she neva gave a reason." I wondered what was wrong but decided I would sell first before visiting her.

"Oh, okay."

"You can sell with me an' Davey if ya want." I shook my head.

"No thanks." I rearranged my papes and headed into the streets to sell for the first time by myself.

It must have been noon when I sat down in an alley opening for break. There weren't that many people out and about today but I was still making a dent in my papers. I only had four more left of my original twenty and then I would be done. My first plan upon finishing selling was to visit Pirate but they may be interrupted since I was hungry. I remembered that everyone normally went to Tibby's for lunch but I didn't feel like seeing any others at the moment. After a five minute break I stood and started selling again. This time I decided to go towards a different part of Manhattan. Maybe there would be more people around there then here.

The day before I had heard Mush talking about a place called Bottle Alley. He said it was a little dangerous but if anyone thought they could handle themselves well could try selling there. I wasn't sure if I could handle myself well but I knew that maybe I could keep my own if I got in a fist fight.

Bottle Alley was filled with the kind of people you wouldn't normally find in upper Manhattan. Girls wearing tight dresses stood in other smaller alleys and on corners. Drunken men were lying or sitting on the ground near buildings. It wasn't what I had thought it would be. It was like a small town of misfits. That's when I heard him, the same voice that almost made me throw up my insides at the sound of it. I turned and saw him coming out of a building laughing with his arm around another man's shoulders. Quickly I jumped behind a crate and crouched down watching from the side.

"So I says to him, I says…" he trailed off and took a gulp of the glass bottle he held in his hand.

"Whaddya say boss?" the other man asked as if he was really interested in what he was saying.

"What are you talking about Slims?" the man, Slims, sighed and sat him down on another crate. My eyes widened as I got a much closer look at him. It had been awhile since I had seen him but I still felt that fear that hatred.

"Hey Slims!" he turned around and another man emerged from the door next to them. I recognized him too and I felt like jumping out from behind the crates and running. They shook hands and then both looked at their boss.

"Any news of her whereabouts?" he asked setting his alcohol down.

"No, we found her in Brooklyn, but haven't seen her since." There was silence. The boss turned towards the crate I was hiding behind and I whipped my head around and fell to the ground.

"What is it?" I heard Slims say.

"I thought I saw something." There was another silence. "Well, keep lookin' for her, I know she couldn't have gotten far, widen your search."

"Yes sir."

"Oh and Benson, when you find her bring her to me alive."

"Right."

"Slims, lets go back inside, I had my eye on a goil in there." I heard shuffling and then a door close. I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding. My gaze looked straight up at the blue sky ahead of me. I could see one strip of it through the building tops and thanked God I hadn't been discovered. After a few minutes of making sure it was safe and thanking my lucky stars I got up and ran out of Bottle Alley. I vowed never to return there because I might run into **him** again.


	4. Truths discovered, lies told

Chapter four- Truths discovered, lies told

It had been two weeks since my encounter at Bottle Alley. Sticking to my vow I hadn't returned there but I acted paranoid ever since that afternoon. I knew Spot was curious about the constant looking over my shoulder, and how I walked at a faster pace than usual. Unlike Spot, Pirate never asked questions, but she hadn't been herself lately either.

"Pirate are you alright?" she turned to me and nodded slowly. I narrowed my eyes in suspicion but I didn't feel like pressing the matter any more.

"You know I'm here if you need to talk." I tried again after a few minutes.

"I don't need ya help or ya sympathy."

"I'm not bein' sympathetic just concerned."

"Concerned my ass, I know sympathy when Ise see it, I've lived on the streets remember?" I sighed and decided to be quiet after that.

The Lodging House loomed in the distance and the silence was killing me. For the rest of the day I was trying to make conversation but all Pirate would do was nod. Before we reached the door I grabbed her shoulders and pushed her into an alley. She was startled at first but tore herself loose and threw a punch at me. I was hit square in the jaw but I quickly retaliated with a quick jab to the ribs. In a blink of an eye both of us were on the ground rolling around hitting each other. Finally she stopped and fell back on the dirt. I pushed myself up and crawled over to a wall and leaned against it.

"Youse pretty good." She said spitting out blood. I laughed and held the back of my hand to my bleeding nose. "I reckon." She looked at me and smirked. "Reckon? What are we? Southern?" I shrugged and leaned my head back holding my nose. It felt as if we had been sitting in our usual silence for a long time before she spoke.

"Vaudeville?" I opened one eye and listened. "Yeah?"

"I-I made a mistake."

"What was it?"

"His names Elijah."

"Why is Elijah a mistake?"

"Because I love him." I picked my head up and stared at her. "I don't see the problem yet."

"We can't be together, he's wealthy, engaged, an' the goil he's with is everythin' I ain't, an' youse just don't get it…I made a mistake."

"Because you can't be with him?"

"No."

"Then what is it!"

"I killed his fiancé." My mouth literally dropped open. She looked down when she saw my expression and ran a hand through her hair. "I know bad right?"

"Bad?!" before I screamed even louder and catch the attention of the bulls I closed my mouth and took a deep breath. "Pirate where's her body?" she looked up at me and shook her head.

"I need ya to help me get rid of it." I felt myself hyperventilating.

"Pirate! We can't just waltz through New York draggin' along a dead body!"

"Please Vaud, youse the only one I can think of that wouldn't toin me in!"

"What bout your boys over there in the lodging house?"

"Don't make me laugh; they wouldn't help me, please!" I looked around the dark alley and after a few more minutes of thinking I finally nodded.

"Fine." She smiled and pushed herself up off the ground.

"Then let's get goin', before Spot shows up." I reached out my hand and she took it pulling me up.

"Spot will show up anyway." She laughed and we both started our way towards Bottle Alley. At first I had no idea where she was headed but finally I realized.

"No, Pirate, I can't go there." She turned back to me confused.

"Why not?"

"I just can't."

"There has to be a reason."

"Somebody I know is there, an' we don't get along, I just can't!"

"I thought you were gonna help me." I stared at her face and sighed deeply. Maybe he wouldn't be there tonight? I reasoned with myself as I hesitantly kept going. We went forward a little longer and I recognized the alley she stopped in. I checked behind my shoulder and did my best to stay alert and aware. She looked around before opening the top of the crate. I covered the bottom half of my face with my hand at the smell. Inside the box was a deathly pale girl, about the age of seventeen, in rather extravagant clothing. Pirate reached inside and wrapped her arms around her upper half. "You get the legs." I pulled my hand down and held my breath grabbing her legs.

"Where we goin'with her?" I asked as Pirate led the way.

"Docks."

"In Brooklyn!" she shook her head.

"There's some around here, don't worry people heah are used to this kind of thing." I looked around and smirked.

"Look at this Slims!" my eyes widened and everything around me seemed to disappear. I dropped the girl's legs and dived to the ground.

"Vaudeville!" I heard Pirate scream from behind me as I started to look for something to hide behind.

"Where you goin' with that body goils?" I knew then and there that I wasn't escaping, it was fate I would see them again.

"Nowhere youse should know." I closed my eyes and took a deep breath hoping Pirate wouldn't get into trouble again.

"Whys ya friend on the ground behind ya?" the second voice I heard was not **his **voice though, it was someone elses, someone I didn't know. Pirate looked behind her and lightly kicked me. After a few more short seconds of taking deep breaths I got up and started to dust myself off. "Well?" I looked up and Slims face dropped.

"Sherry?" Pirate turned to me and my eyes fell to the ground.

"That's not my name." I heard a laugh.

"Damn right it ain't."

"Vaudeville?"

"Vaudeville?!" there was laughter. "That's what they call ya now?" my head shot up at the newcomer's voice. I didn't recognize him but he must have known me.

"Yes it is, got a problem with it?" Slims started to laugh and nudged his friend.

"Oh, well isn't someone much braver than usual?" the boy grabbed my arm and pulled me into him pulling off my newsie cap. My blonde hair fell down to the middle of my back and he smiled, "Still the same physically maybe."

"Hey! Leave her alone!" I heard Pirate yell from next to me. She must have tried to help me since Slims had grabbed her now and was starting to take her away. I turned back to the boy who had pulled out a knife. He ran it along my cheek and then down to my neck.

"We've been lookin' for ya Sherry."

"You don't think I don't know that?" I replied rather boldly. He smirked.

"Youse know what we want." I felt the blade dig a little into my neck causing blood spill. "Where is it?"

"First tell me who you are, and how you know me."

"Ah, a little negotiation? Well that may cost ya." I felt him lick the blood on my skin. I felt sensation of throwing up but I held it in and tried to keep my emotions under control.

"What is the cost?" he lifted his head.

"I haven't decided."

"Then forget it I'm not gonna tell you."

"Wrong answer." He pulled the knife away from my neck and repositioned it near the back of my head. I knew he was about to slit my throat; I closed my eyes tightly and hoped Pirate would be okay.

"Hey!" I felt the knife pull away quickly.

"Who are youse?!" there was no reply. Swiftly I was shoved to the ground onto the dead girl. My eyes shot open and I saw Spot fighting the boy in front of me. He tried to stab Spot, but he pulled the boy forward and twisted his wrist. The knife fell to the ground and I grabbed it. Spot pushed the boy backwards into the wall and kicked him in the stomach twice. Once he fell down and Spot was sure he wasn't getting up he turned to me.

"We'll talk 'bout this later, where's Pirate?" I could hear the aggravation in his voice but I didn't blame him. I turned and looked around frantically. When I couldn't see her I screamed her name.

"Over heah!" I heard her finally reply. I followed her voice towards another pile of crates and saw Slims lying on the ground.

"What happened?"

"I told 'em not to touch me." She replied smiling. I laughed and gave her a hug.

"Sorry to break up this happy moment but we got two problems, one, these two, and two, the dead goil lying near the guy I just beat the shit out of, can either of youse explain that one to me?" Pirate and I looked at each other than walked back over to where we had left our secret.

"It's a long story Spot, we were tryin' to get rid of her, when these two came and-"he held up his hand and reached down grabbing her legs.

"Just, let's get 'er out of heah." We both nodded and helped him carry her towards water. After Pirate checked to make sure no one was watching we threw her in. We walked back to the Manhattan Lodging house in silence. Spot walked in first leaving Pirate and I outside.

"Thanks a lot Vaudeville." I turned to her from where I had been staring.

"Oh sure, anything for a friend." She stared at me for the longest time.

"Can you tell me who those guys were?" I turned towards the doorway of the Lodging house and saw Spot standing there with his arms crossed, cane clenched in his left hand.

"That's what I'd like to know." He snapped. I sighed and shook my head.

"They're no one guys, just forget about them." Spot narrowed his eyes.

"I won't forget, but I'll leave youse alone 'bout it for tonight." I nodded my thanks. "Pirate, get some rest, and don't worry too much 'bout Miss. Rich goil." I watched her smile and nod and he patted her on the shoulder. When she was safely in the lodging house and probably getting a lecture from Jack Kelly Spot turned to me with his usual glare.

"What?"

"I'm not happy with you right now." I sighed.

"Your point?"

"I already said I'd talk about this later, that's when you'll get my point." For the rest of the walk back to Brooklyn Spot didn't say a word to me. I thanked God in my head for that favor but I knew Spot's silence wouldn't be for long.

**A/n: Okay, so I know long wait. But listen to this, everytime I tried to put up chapter four the thing would tell me there was an error. I was so upset, finally I got it to work. So I read over this and edited it. Tell me if I missed anything and if you liked it. sooo...PLEASE REVIEW!!**


	5. If I could change your mind

Chapter five- If I could change your mind…

Spot was awful at making punishments. Not in the awful as in they weren't good enough, but as in you almost wanted to commit suicide. It had been two weeks since Pirate and I had decided to take a dive on the dark side and dispose of a body. For that entire time I had been sitting in the warehouse bored out of my mind. Newsboys would occasionally come and go snickering at me before exiting again to the freedom I longed for. Spot hadn't told me when I was off of restriction which was probably part of the mental punishment.

I drummed my fingers on the wooden table I was sitting at and stared at the scattered playing cards. _Nothing to do. _I thought as I turned my attention to the window. The sun hadn't begun to set so I was stuck on my own for a couple more hours. A part of me wanted to disregard Spot's punishment and leave but hell would be paid if he returned before I did. I rested my head on the table and closed my eyes. The warehouse had seemed to grow colder than usual and I was without a jacket. All the money I earned from selling papes was either given to Spot or paid for my meals and lodging. Thoughts raced in my head about the meeting I had with Slims and the unknown man. Spot hadn't asked me about any of it yet but I knew it was only a matter of time. I drifted off into a restless sleep.

"Vaudeville!" someone was shaking me fiercely and I awoke to a noisy room.

"Spot?" I mumbled as I lifted my head rubbing my eyes.

"Nah, this is Sky." Sky had been one of the Brooklyn newsies that had befriended me so far. He was nice and mostly sat on his own. I had asked him what he planned to do with his future since he was still so young. At only fourteen he was preparing to earn enough to leave New York and make his way to Europe to find his family. Many times Sky had come close to the amount he needed but usually he would need to spend it on necessities. I told him that if Spot ever let me keep any of the money I earned I would lend him some but he declined. He was a generous boy and I didn't look forward to the day he left the warehouse.

"Where is Spot?" I asked after waking completely up and looking around.

"Don't know he up an' left."

"I wish he was here I'm hungry."

"Still on restriction?" Sky laughed.

"Yeah, that an' Spot says I'm not allowed to go out by myself anyway."

"That's unusual for Spot to be so protective of a goil." I turned to him curious at his observation.

"Have there been other girls here?"

"Yeah, but most didn't make it after the average time of six months to a year."

"Did they all give up?"

"That an' takin' other jobs most died though." I shook my head. "From what?"

"Anything, murder, starvation, inability to sell papes." He paused and looked around the room at the energetic boys. "Bein' a newsie requires a skill some don't have. Its hard livin' on these streets, it's almost like an art. Some loin the trade, others don't. Sometimes it's a good job to have. Lurin' to those who don't have the complete freedom we do, an' a death wish to some who decide to try it. I would never recommend anyone to do this, ever." He looked at me and I could see the distress in his eyes. "When newcomers show up the foist thought that runs through everyone's heads is "How long is he gonna last?" an' then it's almost like a play unfoldin' an' we wait to see how their story ends. One year you may become fast friends with someone and the next year they're dead." I looked at the newsboys around me as well and wondered whether each one would live to be ninety or die young. In some ways I could relate to Sky in others I couldn't. I would never come close to know what it was truly like to be a street kid, a newsboy. Sure I had lived on the streets, but mostly under a roof. I had my problems, everyone did, but the reality of living on the streets hit you hard and it was almost depressing to think about. If only every wealthy person out there knew what it was like maybe they would buy a pape, maybe they would help. "Spot knows better than anyone about these factors," I turned my attention back to Sky. "Whenever someone comes he writes their name down, an' if they die or leave he crosses it off, as if to say they don't exist anymore."

"Did he write my name down?" he nodded.

"Yeah, he wrote every goil's name down that has ever passed through these walls. An' crossed them off when they left. But he had never been protective of any of 'em. Even when they were runnin' from something, even when they needed help, he was never protective. Of course he cared what leader doesn't? Once you're a newsie you become part of a family that will never leave you as long as you here." I nodded already noticing this quality amongst the boys. "What I want to know though is what makes you so special as to be _protected_ by Spot?" I turned to him surprised by his question. It was obvious we were getting to some question about Spot's and I relationship. Nothing seemed to come up in my mind to answer. I started to grow uncomfortable under his relentless gaze.

"I don't know I don't mean anything to him." Sky laughed and his eyes turned back to the ones that were usually lit up with optimism.

"I figured you'd say something like that." Our conversation ended and it was never brought up again of what I meant to our leader Spot Conlon.

I woke up earlier than usual. Since I never left the lodging house I usually slept in most days. Sometimes I would sneak out to the docks just to pass time outside though this time I intended to beg Spot to let me sell. I desperately wanted to see Pirate and the others again and actually leave the confinements of the warehouse.

It was a known fact that Spot was up and not in the bunkroom. When I had come to live here Spot had given me his room to keep the decency under check. Quietly I crept past the room that echoed with snores and murmurs of boys who still hadn't been woken up yet. I slipped out the door and outside into the chilly air. If I did sell today I would refuse to hawk up my money and save it to buy a jacket. Winter was still not over yet and I wasn't going to freeze to death. I looked around the crates as I searched for him. By the time I had reached the dock he was nowhere in sight. _Would he really still be asleep? _That was unlikely since Spot got much amusement from screaming for his boys to get up. I sighed and plopped down on the wooden boards deciding I would wait a few more minutes then return. The sky was beautiful and the water almost lulled me back to sleep. It was peaceful and I wondered why New York never slowed down to enjoy this. Why I had never slowed down to enjoy it until after I came to live with the Brooklyn newsies. They were rough boys which were expected but they held a sort of gentleness you would never find anywhere else. Maybe it was because of what Sky had said last night. They _understood_ the harsh realities of life. They realized how precious life was and how much it took to survive. For that I respected them and hoped that one day I could come to grips with that realization they all seemed to hold no matter who they were.

"I thought I said not to leave the warehouse under any circumstances." I jumped and turned to see Spot standing behind me his blue eyes narrowed. I smirked and turned back to the water in front of me.

"You did but I've been in there for two weeks, can't I be let out now?" he sat down next to me and laughed.

"Maybe, it was rather amusin' to see you stuck there." I glared at him.

"Was not amusin' for me."

"I know that was _why_ it was so funny."

"I don't enjoy that Spot." He smirked.

"I don't enjoy my newsies keepin' secrets from me." I turned to him.

"Aren't all newsies lives secrets?" he smiled at me.

"Sometimes." I nodded. "But not now. I have let it go until now about the night of Pirate's request. So tell me now Vaudeville, who were those guys?" I knew I had this coming for awhile now. Something inside of me warned me against telling him anything about the past I was constantly running from. It was a secret I'd rather leave buried in my head and not out in the open for me to remember.

"If I tell you, will you let me off of restriction?"

"That's the intention."

"So this is blackmail?" he laughed. "You could call it that." I wondered if he would be able to tell if I lied to him. I shook that thought from my mind reminding myself it was always better to be honest with Spot.

"I got mixed up with some people, and they've been looking for me for awhile now."

"Same people that left you to die?" I nodded. "That would be them."

"Why did they attempt to murder you?"

"I don't know."

"I don't believe you."

"Well it doesn't matter what you believe."

"Did you do something wrong?"

"Maybe."

"Dangerous?"

"I guess."

"Do you know or have something of theirs you're not giving up?"

"I could."

"Did you steal it?"

"I'm not a thief." I began to grow aggravated at his prying. Why did it matter so much what I've done? It wouldn't affect Spot; they weren't after him or the Brooklyn newsies.

"I need to know."

"Why? Why is this so important? Do you always pry into your newsies lives!?" he stared at me. "Only if it might hurt them or the people around them."

"Well it doesn't concern you or your newsies; it all has to do with me, my past."

"It does concern me and my newsies. You are living with us, an' if some guys are gonna come around an' cause trouble, an' possibly kill one of my newsies I ain't gonna just let it go." I stood and started to walk away deciding it best not to bring up the one thing I've tried to hide. Many times I told myself it was my fault. If I hadn't done this, if I had only been a good little girl I wouldn't be in this mess. I felt a hand on my arm and he spun me around to face him. "Don't walk away from me Vaudeville, I am tryin' to help ya, I've been tryin' to help ya since day one. So help me help you an' tell me what's wrong." His voice wasn't the usual roughness that demanded respect and submission. It was soft and understanding silently pressing for information. I pulled my arm away from his grip and lowered my head.

"Nothing is wrong, Spot." He shook his head. "I know that's a lie."

"So what if it is?" I paused and tried to control my thoughts. My head started to pound and things began to get blurry. I was caught up in trying to run but trying to stay and I couldn't agree with myself. "Lies are made to keep things away from view, out of the open, Spot I don't want you to know why I was there, I don't want anyone to know, just please let me stay here, just let me be a newsie a little longer. It's the only thing that matters to me right now. Soon my past will catch up with me, but when it does I will leave, I will keep you out of it I promise, just please, let me just keep it hidden, just a little bit, let me pretend everything's okay, please?" he watched me hold my face in my hands and start to cry. The last thing I wanted to do was break down in front of him, show him I'm weak. That maybe he was right. I can't survive on the streets; I don't have what it takes to be a newsie. I felt his arms wrap around me and he held me close, gently. I pulled my hands away from my face and latched onto him. He was the only thing that had felt real at that moment, that wouldn't forsake me. "Okay. But only for a little bit, but then promise me you'll tell me the truth." He whispered as he rested his chin on my head. I nodded, "I promise." We stayed like that for awhile until I pulled away and he went to arouse the boys. I assumed that I was off of restriction and could return to Manhattan. I wasn't sure if Slims and the others were still looking for me. It was smart on Spot's part to keep me off of the streets for awhile, but he was always one step ahead of everything. As I waited for Spot to return so he could walk me to Manhattan I made a pact. I would either leave before I had to reveal the truth to Spot, or stay and try to change from the person I used to be. Either way I felt like I would lose.

**A/n: I know it took me such a LONG time to write more. But this story has been on my mind for awhile. I've been working on other "projects" and got caught up in finishing a story I had already begun. I finished it, and finally freed up some time to work on this one. I can promise this will be on the top of my list, but I can't promise a sooner update. I'm moving on saturday and won't have access to a computer and my documents for awhile. So I will try my best. I am so sorry, and please keep reading and reviewing! it is always appreciated.**


	6. Come what may

Chapter six- Come what may

Everyone was happy to see me once I returned to Manhattan.

"Good to have ya back." Pirate said as we stood in line for papers. I nodded and tried to put on my best smile. My previous encounter from Spot had left me a little shaken and I wondered what he was thinking. A part of me felt as if he would make me leave soon or maybe on his own pry into my past. I had left him curious but I felt like he wouldn't do any of those things.

Pirate and I bought our papers and made our way out into the streets. It was unusually cold today and not many people were out. I could barely yell out my headlines with my teeth chattering so bad, Pirate had the same problem. At noon neither of us had sold a thing and we plopped down in Tibby's starving and disappointed.

"Didn't do so well?" Race asked who had obviously sold something since he had a plate of food in front of him. I shook my head and rested my chin against the palm of my hand. Race smirked and cut his sandwich into three pieces passing two to Pirate and me. We both accepted it graciously and devoured them in less than two seconds.

"Thanks." I mumbled reaching for his drink. He laughed as I took a sip and passed it to Pirate. "How come you did so well?" I inquired watching him order himself another sandwich. He shrugged, "Experience."

"I have experience!" Pirate said slightly slamming her hand down on the table. He laughed, "Yeah, well I have more." I smiled at them both and wondered where the others might be.

Pirate and I didn't linger long and left before anyone else could show up. Race had informed us that he would only sell one more hour then head home. It was too cold to be outside with no protection against the winds. Pirate and I agreed to do the same and made our way towards Central Park. It was unlikely anyone would be there enjoying the scenery but it was always worth a try.

"Some whiskey would be good right now." Pirate muttered as she pulled her cap down farther. I laughed. "You drink Pirate?" she shrugged. "Every now and then." We both started to laugh imaging the look on the newsboy's faces if we walked in drunk.

After walking for a few minutes we saw two people scurrying along. Pirate motioned for me to take the job and I nodded rushing towards them. I called out the headline but neither stopped. Again I tried but I never got a look from the potential customers. When I turned to show my failure to Pirate she was gone.

"Pirate!?" I called looking around the park. No one was in sight and it seemed horrifyingly empty. "Pirate!?" I screamed becoming more frantic. Quickly I dropped all of my papers and ran towards the lodging house. I hoped that newsies had decided to turn in thinking it futile to sell papers in this weather. As I ran I hoped Pirate's disappearance had nothing to do with Slims and **him**.

"What's wrong Vaudeville?" Specs asked as I stumbled into the lodging house out of breath.

"Pirate, she's missing." I gasped leaning down to catch my breath. Specs turned to Blink who was standing next to him and they quickly became concerned.

"What happened?!" Blink asked rushing towards me. I looked up and breathed in deep filling my lungs with air. "I don't know, I tried to sell a pape and when I turned around she was gone." Without anymore explanation Specs rushed upstairs to alert everyone. In a matter of minutes everyone was back out in the cold screaming for Pirate. I joined in the best I could despite the numb feeling that had taken over my body. Slowly I became unaware that I was walking. I pushed the thoughts aside and decided finding Pirate was more important than my health.

Sun set quickly and we were still looking. I had even stopped the occasional person and asked them if they had seen a newsie anywhere hurt or in danger. Everyone I asked had shook their head and continued on their way. Soon they would forget I had even inquired and Pirate would be lost. I felt that if I didn't find her today I would never find her again. Who could have taken her? Why hadn't she screamed? Did she and I just hadn't heard her? Was she dead by now? It was cold and Pirate, like many newsies, had no jacket. She would freeze to death if she was hurt somewhere. I leaned against a wall and screamed her name once more before I felt I couldn't scream anymore. My voice grew hoarse and I could taste blood in my mouth. I felt someone rest their hands on my shoulders, "Vaudeville." It was Race. He was gently coaxing me to come back to the lodging house and take a break. I opened my mouth to scream "no" but nothing came out. Something fell on my face and melted immediately. When I looked up there was snow falling. The only thought was of Pirate in danger and us not being able to come to her rescue. "Vaudeville come on." I heard Race again and I pushed him away from me staggering forward. Inside my head I was telling him that I had to save her that I couldn't leave her to die, I could never leave anyone to die. I knew nothing was coming out, nothing at all. Soon I tuned out his voice trying to continue finding her. I saw two people block my way and I turned to the side. There were more and I knew the newsies were trying to get me to calm down. I pushed the two boys I only assumed as Mush and Blink out of my way and ran. I didn't want to go back without her. Again I attempted to scream but there was no sound. I was as silent as the snow that covered the black streets. "Sherry." I stopped running and turned to see Spot standing behind me with a stern look. "That's enough, come home." I felt tears in my eyes and looked away from him. _Home?_ I thought as I closed my eyes. "Its okay, we'll find her tomorra." I nodded and stumbled forward. He pulled my arm around his neck and helped me walk back towards the Duane Street lodging house.

Spots POV

Once I had put Vaudeville to rest in the bunkroom I walked downstairs. Jack, Race, and a couple of others were standing around Kloppman's desk.

"Is she alright?" Jack asked lighting up a much needed cigarette. I shrugged and sat down on the second to bottom step. "Depends on your definition of 'alright.'" He smirked and passed the cigarette to me. I gratefully accepted it and took a long drag contemplating.

"What do you think happened to Pirate?" Race asked chewing on his cigar. I shook my head as I blew out smoke, "Anything coulda happened to her." Jack nodded his agreement, "She's my newsie Spot." I nodded understanding what he meant. All leaders of the Burroughs had an obligation to protect and look after all those they accepted every day. They felt responsible for the kids they watched over and made sure nothing happened to them. Each newsboy counted on them for guidance and if one went missing their life was in their hands. "Tomorra everyone looks, if we don't find 'er, then she's lost." I stood after my declaration and walked towards the door. "I'll come for 'er tomorra." Jack nodded and I left. As I walked back to Brooklyn I noted the time. Before I reached the bridge I made a turn down another road and walked farther into Manhattan. It had been a hard day for my newsies as well to sell. Each had come up empty handed or close to it. The owner of the warehouse told them it was fine if they didn't pay lodging for one night.

I stopped at a large home. Slowly I turned the door knob and walked inside. "Hello?" I called as I looked around the empty entrance of the house.

"Master Conlon?!" I turned and saw our maid Holly rush towards me. She smiled and threw her arms around my neck. I slowly reached up and embraced her as well. It had been a few years since I had returned to this place_._ "I thought you were dead, I thought you would never come back!"

"Well I'm not back forever." I said as she pulled away from me.

"You're not staying?" I shook my head and shoved my hands into my pockets.

"Where is everyone?" I inquired wondering why my family wasn't rejoicing at my return. She sighed and looked around then grabbed my arm and led me towards the kitchen. "Ian I have some bad news." I looked at her and a sudden fear struck. Normally I never felt that feeling, the only times I would ever _fear_ was when it involved my family. The loving family I left. It was a secret that the infamous Spot Conlon was wealthy, that he had a family to run to if things got too tough. Spot hadn't run to them though, he paid his dues like every other newsboy. He knew of harsh realities, and he would much rather live that way than live in blissful ignorance. "What?" she paused and sighed pouring a cup of coffee most likely for me. "Your parents and your sister…" she trailed off and pushed the cup towards me. I accepted it and took a sip feeling my stomach churn. "They were murdered Ian, for the money they owned." I was happy I had set the cup down before she had broken the news and I shook my head. "We still have the property, but I don't know if the people have the money or the papers." I turned away from her and stood exiting the kitchen. She followed me and grabbed my arm. "Ian, please come back to us, take the house. We don't want any thieves living here and taking over the inheritance. You're the only one who can accept it!" I pulled my arm away from her grip and opened the door. "Holly, do you have a jacket I could borrow?" she stared at me and hesitantly nodded. When she returned I gratefully took it and forced a weak smile. "I'm not comin' back, don't get youse hopes up." Was all I said as I closed the door. I felt myself denying the fact that my family had been killed. Now I was truly an orphan, I was an eighteen year old rich boy living another life as the notorious Brooklyn leader Spot Conlon. I could easily accept my inheritance and live in that huge mansion becoming some businessman that previously I had loathed. Shove kids away from me and turn a blind eye to the city of New York. That wasn't what I wanted to do, that wasn't what was crossing my mind. I wanted to find the people who had murdered my innocent family, my loving dad and mom, my young pretty sister, who could have killed them?

Vaudeville POV

I woke up in the quiet Manhattan lodging house. Slowly I pushed back the quilts surrounding me and rested my feet on the cold hardwood floor. I easily had slept through Kloppman's voice and the noisy boys as they got ready. As I looked out the window I noticed the snow had covered everything and I smiled. Most likely the younger newsies were having snowball fights in between calling out headlines. When I was younger and lived with my mother and father I used to play in the snow all the time with my next door neighbor. Quickly I pulled on my shoes and rushed down the steps.

"Whoa there Vaude." I turned to Kloppman who was smiling from behind the desk. "Spot said you had to wait until he came to pick you up before leaving." My face dropped and I let out sigh. "I don't wanna wait." I replied realizing my voice had become extremely rough. He nodded knowingly. "I know, I told Jack the same thing when he informed me to keep you here." We both laughed and when we had finished Kloppman disappeared down a hallway. I watched after him and then turned back towards the windows downstairs. _I wonder if Pirate would like to…_my thoughts stopped as I remembered that Pirate was not around. All my memories came flooding back. From when I screamed her name and she was nowhere in sight, to where Spot had to finally demand I return to the lodging house. I closed my eyes keeping my emotions in check. It seemed to be the only thing I always had trouble with. "Pirate…" I mumbled hoping that wherever she was she was fighting to return to us.

It was later that day that Spot had finally come for me. He entered the home and called my name. I had been upstairs playing cards with the younger newsies who had been sent home early because of the still freezing temperatures. They all waved goodbye as I dashed down the stairs. When I reached Spot he thrust a jacket into my hands.

"I knew you needed it so I got ya one." I smiled at him and slipped it on. Immediately I felt it begin to warm me up.

"Thank you Spot." He shrugged and I noticed that he was not himself. Something was seriously wrong. "What's wrong?" I asked as we walked out of the house.

"Nothing." I shook my head. "Obviously something." He kept walking and disregarded my last comment. "Spot you made me tell you." There was still no response. "I broke down in front of you. I even cried, I mean at least you could tell me what's wrong. It's always best to tell someone instead of keeping those feelings locked inside. I'm good listener anyway and-" he gritted his teeth. "My family's dead!" he turned and yelled at me. I stared at him with a surprised expression that quickly turned to one of sympathy. I knew he didn't want sympathy but it was possibly what he needed. Someone who could hold him and tell him they understood. I reached for him and wrapped my arms around his waist. At first he struggled and tried to push me away but finally gave in. He turned in my grip and held me close once more. I couldn't tell whether he was crying or not but it didn't matter. I would keep this a secret for I knew Spot wouldn't want anyone to know. It was all part of his image and if anyone had found out that he was holding a girl and possibly crying it could be ruined.

He finally pulled away from me and we continued the rest of the way to Brooklyn. I felt as if Spot and I were spending a lot of time in each others arms. Maybe things were close to being revealed. Hopefully that wouldn't happen.

As we walked in silence I thought about the pact I had made earlier. I finally decided on leaving before anything could be brought out into the open. Spot would let me keep my pape money and I would do what Sky was doing. I would save up enough to leave New York and go somewhere else. Starting now that would be my goal, it was best I disappear soon or someone else may get hurt or lost.

Spot had finally told me he wanted me to start selling in Brooklyn. I only assumed it was because he wanted me close by. Pirate's disappearance had shaken most of the newsies. Some were still keeping a look out and Spot had sent out his birdies.

Sky and I sat down on the sidewalk curb and pulled out our lunches. Both of us were having the same thing; sandwiches as usual. It was the only thing newsies seemed to live off of, it was the cheapest thing.

"So you hoid about Medda's?" he asked after we had been eating a little bit. I shook my head. "No, what's Medda's?" he laughed. "She helps us out." I nodded and we both ate some more until he continued. "Well she's throwin' a party two days from now, you goin'?" I shrugged and smiled at the thought of newsies at a party. It seemed that they only sold papers and hung out with themselves but I guess they would have some type of social life. Doesn't everyone outside of work?

"Sounds like fun." I mumbled through a full mouth.

"Yeah, it's goin' to be, you goin' with anyone?" I swallowed and smiled. "You asking me?" he shrugged and I saw him start to turn red.

"I might."

"Okay, I'll go with ya." His head shot up and his smile grew larger.

"You not goin' with Spot?" I rolled my eyes and stood shifting my papers. When I started to walk away I could hear him yelling after me about what he said. I wondered why everyone thought Spot and I was an item. Maybe sometimes we seemed like it but I guess we were friends. "Vaudeville!" I stopped as Sky caught up with me. "I didn't mean to upset ya." I smiled and shook my head. "You didn't let's just finish selling." He nodded and we tried to tackle the only people outside.

Spot was waiting for me the next day at the door of the warehouse. I walked up to him and smiled. As usual he didn't smile back and only motioned for me to follow him. We walked to his favorite place; the docks.

"I hoid you goin' to Medda's with Sky." I nodded and watched him lean against a wooden post. "He's fourteen ya know."

"Yeah, and your point?"

"How old are you?"

"Seventeen."

"There ya go." I sighed exasperated by his statement.

"Does age mean so much to you Spot?"

"Sometimes."

"I don't know why you're making a big deal out of Sky and me."

"I don't know why you're goin' with a fourteen year old instead of someone older." I smiled and wondered if Spot was jealous that I had found someone else to go with instead of him. "You're not goin' with Sky, end of story." I narrowed my eyes and placed my hands on my hips.

"You ain't the boss of me!" he turned towards me and lifted his cane.

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me!"

"I am to the boss of you, an' I say you ain't goin' with Sky."

"So I can't have any fun!?" he shrugged and slipped his cane through the loop in his pants. "I guess not." With that he walked away.

**A/n:** **Okay. new update. Sorry if things run together. I didn't go back to edit the paragraphs. review review review.**


	7. Forever hold your peace in pieces

Chapter seven- Forever hold your peace in pieces

It was raining hard the night of Medda's party and I was sitting in my room sulking. Spot had declared that no one would be going to Irving Hall tonight due to the weather conditions and walking distance. I somewhat believed that he was doing what was best for his newsies, but the other part of me knew he was smirking because he had stopped Sky and I from going together. A day after our argument he had expressed his feelings again about the matter and it took everything I had not to scream. He had claimed that Sky and I lived together and it was pointless to be going together somewhere when you would naturally be going together anyway. I had told him what an idiot he sounded like and walked away before receiving another tongue lashing. Now I was listening to the rain pelt the roof and the yelling of the boys downstairs. I had refused to come downstairs to eat when Spot had knocked on my door a couple hours earlier. This was my way of protesting his stupidity, but it would get me nothing but an empty stomach.

"Vaudeville?" I turned towards the door and recognized Sky's voice.

"Come in!" I called wondering if Spot knew he was up here. If so I was surprised he wasn't being dragged away in ropes for even standing outside my room. He pushed open the door slightly and poked his head in.

"How come you're not downstairs?" I shrugged and motioned for him to come in further. He ducked out and then quickly slipped in silently shutting the door. "Is this about Spot?"

"I guess."

"You guys are always at it."

"Only sometimes."

"More like all the time." He sat down cross legged on the floor and I joined him. "You fight like a married couple."

"Do not!" I protested crossing my arms. He laughed and shook his head pulling a deck of cards from his back pocket.

"Would you like to play?" I nodded eager for some entertainment and he started to shuffle the worn out deck. "I hoid not a lot of people went to Medda's tonight anyway." He commented dealing out the cards.

"I figured, I mean the weather is pretty brutal." I snatched my seven up and we naturally picked 'Go fish' as our game of choice.

"Yeah, so I guess she's havin' it some other time."

"Don't know her very well, but I guess so."

"Maybe we can try to go then?" I smiled and said go fish when he asked if I had any sevens. This time we wouldn't say anything and Spot wouldn't be able to lecture me over nothing.

"Yeah, we can try. No talking about it though, or Spot would be in our business like a-"

"Like a what?" we both turned to see Spot standing in the door way arms crossed and cane present. I rolled my eyes and threw down my cards assuming he would banish Sky from my room. He may go as far as demanding Sky not come within twenty feet of me.

"Nothing." I replied watching him. He narrowed his eyes and turned on Sky.

"What are you doing in here?" he stood dropping his cards.

"I just wanted to keep Vaudeville company."

"If she wanted company she would be downstairs not up here." Sky did not reply but instead waited for Spot's instructions. "Go back downstairs and don't come in this room again, unless I give you permission." He nodded and flashed me an apologetic glance before exiting the room. "And as for you-"

"Save it." I interrupted standing and falling onto the bed.

"What is with your attitude today?"

"You." He did not respond but instead slammed my door shut. I didn't care for his hissy fits today and only rolled over to fall asleep.

"Thank god it's warm enough to have people come outside!" I exclaimed unbuttoning the jacket Spot had given me. Sky nodded and shoved some pennies he received from an older gentleman into his pocket. We continued selling papers in silence until we reached the Brooklyn Bridge and I stared across longingly. It had been awhile since I had ventured over into Manhattan and I missed it desperately, especially my friend Pirate, who had still not returned. I would find myself tossing and turning at night wondering where she was or having dreams that I would stumble across her dead somewhere. Even when I was awake I would see her. She was always around the next corner and occasionally I would run and look but find nothing. Only once had I been brave enough to bring up my dilemma to Spot who had only laughed and said I was losing my mind. Since then I had kept my thoughts to myself and hoped soon enough they would go away.

"How bout you an' I go over to Manhattan." I turned to Sky who was staring at me intently.

"Are you crazy? Spot would have our heads!" he laughed. "True."

"And how is that funny?"

"It's not, but I know you wanna go over there an' visit." He was right; it was a little too obvious that I missed my friends there. Often times Spot would yell at me for my sudden attitude change and I knew it had everything to do with being confined to Brooklyn. "Come on, we'll be back before Spot notices." I didn't believe him since Spot seemed to notice everything, and even now I knew he _would_ find out we left for Manhattan.

"Alright." He smiled grabbing my free hand and dashing across the bridge.

There were more people out and about in Manhattan than in Brooklyn and I beamed at my potential costumers. Sky also seemed to realize this and immediately started to call out headlines. I quickly followed his lead and walked slightly away from him to gather my own crowd. By sunset I was sure we would walk into the warehouse with more than the others. This would only cause problems and suspicion but I tried not to think about the consequences Sky and I would face.

"We should be heading back." He announced as we both stopped to count our earnings.

"We really should, but can I see everyone first?" there was a small pause before he nodded.

"Yeah, go ahead." I smiled and shoved my change into my pockets before running down Fifth Street. I didn't stop to make sure Sky had followed me for I was pretty sure he was close behind. In only a matter of minutes I was outside the lodging house and could see the shadows of the boys through the windows. Quickly I walked in opening my arms as if I was expecting hugs.

"I'm back!" I called as I looked around at their faces. Some were surprised, other had blank expressions but it took a few minutes before it registered that I was there.

"Vaudeville, we haven't seen ya in foreva!" Snipeshooter called and I nodded my agreement.

"Spot musta locked you up good over there in Brooklyn." A few snickers accompanied Kid Blink's comment but I shrugged.

"You could say that." Sky had finally entered and he was greeted more warmly than I. "What took ya so long?" I asked as he leaned against Kloppman's counter.

"I wasn't in the mood for runnin'." There were a few laughs and soon enough all of us were engaged in animated conversation. I had completely forgotten that by this time Spot would be looking for me in the warehouse since I was expected to return home before everyone else. When Race had asked me if Spot knew I was here my smile faded and I turned to Sky who looked automatically worried.

"Actually, he doesn't." silence followed my reply and Race sighed.

"He'll be raisin' hell if ya ain't back." There was a pause as he stopped to light his cigar. "And I mean if ya ain't back _now._" Quickly I said my goodbyes and grabbed Sky's sleeve as we both dashed out of the lodging house and towards the bridge. I knew as we reached Brooklyn that there would be major hell to pay.

Everything seemed normal as Sky and I stopped in front of the warehouse door. I inhaled sharply and glanced towards him. He only nodded and I pushed open the door. Everyone turned to see who had entered their expressions turning to amusement. They knew what awaited us for leaving without permission or me at least.

"You are gonna get it!" Striker called causing many of the newsies to laugh. "You too Sky, don't think ya off the hook!" Sky pushed me towards the stairs. I was looking around paranoid that Spot would appear out of nowhere holding an axe. When we reached my room without incident I was amazed psychotic Spot hadn't shown himself by now.

"Where do you think he is?" I asked Sky as I hesitated outside my door. He shrugged.

"He could be anywhere." It sounded as if we were discussing some horror story and normally I would laugh if it wasn't my life on the line. "Well, I'll see you later." He waved and disappeared down the hall to the bunkroom. I felt as if he knew something I didn't but I shrugged the feeling off. Sighing I slid into my room and closed the door.

"Where the hell have you been?!" I spun around letting out a small scream as I saw a dark silhouette standing near my bed.

"Spot!" I gasped closing my eyes in relief that it wasn't another person I had been thinking about a lot lately.

"Answer my question." His voice was venomous and my relief quickly faded.

"I went to Manhattan, I thought you would know." He stepped towards me his hands clenched at his sides.

"You thought I would know?"

"Yes."

"Well I didn't fuckin' know!" he screamed raising his hand like he was inches away from hitting me. I cringed waiting for impact. It never came and I opened my eyes that I had subconsciously closed. He had lowered his hand and was breathing heavily his eyes burning into mine.

"Why do you care so much?" I asked curious as to the reasons he always kept an eye on me, or why he locked me up, or why I couldn't go to Manhattan. Why did he care about some poor stupid girl who had almost died? Suddenly his expression changed, and his eyes softened. He took two more steps closer to me so that our faces were inches apart. His eyes searched mine for an answer I couldn't give. I realized he didn't have an answer to give me.

"Next time you want to go to Manhattan, I'll take you." Was all he said as he stepped away from me. Quietly he left my room and I wondered if there was more to us than I thought there was, more I wasn't realizing.

**A/n: I briefly edited this chapter. I know it has been extremely long since I have written at all! I am so sorry for those of you who are still interested in even reading my story. Supposedly the last time I updated was in August. Well I ended up moving twice, and only shortly after I moved the first time. So I've been very busy getting used to a new school and all that jazz. Now I am determined to catch up on my writing. I actually re read everything over and realized i had written an update awhile ago but never posted it. strange right? so here it is. my new chapter. I will be dilliegent from now on. Please review! thank you. **


	8. You look so fine

Chapter Eight- You look so fine

Spot had been extremely distant after the day I had gone to Manhattan. The only time he would speak to me was if I asked him a question. Sky had realized his change in behavior as well and asked me if I knew anything. I had an idea, but I didn't feel like sharing this with Sky and only shook my head.

"It's just weird; Spot…doesn't normally act this way." I kept quiet as Sky expressed his concern. "I would talk to him but he is older than me." He sighed and sat down. I had kept walking and only realized he had stopped when he called my name.

"Oh jeez, I didn't see you." I said turning and sitting down next to him.

"You know, today is my birthday."

"Oh, well happy…" I stopped speaking when what he had said registered. "Today is your birthday!" I exclaimed jumping up in surprise. He laughed and nodded as I composed myself. "How old are you now?!"

"Fifteen." I couldn't believe that time had flown by so fast. Plopping back down on the curb next to him I shook my head.

"Humph, who woulda thought."

"Obviously not you."

"We need to celebrate this glorious event!" I balled my hand into a fist and punched the air. Sky was still laughing at my response.

"Have you never had a birthday in your life?" I was silent as memories of my past replayed in my mind. Sky noticed my sudden silence, "Oh, sorry."

"No, no it's fine." I replied sighing, "Birthday's where I came from…they weren't celebrated." I glanced towards Sky who looked like he pitied me. Quickly I flashed a smile and began to laugh. "But that's fine, because now I have yours!" he forced a smile and I began to plan as we finished selling papers.

Once we were back at the warehouse I searched for Spot. He was nowhere to be found inside so I assumed he was at the docks. Sure enough I found him sitting on the edge staring blankly ahead. I wondered briefly what he was thinking. His face always looked as if he was seeing or thinking something only he would understand. Spot lived only in his thoughts and only in what he knew. Never did he venture out of his well built box, a box he fought to keep so it would confine him. That was at least what I believed, though he had made it clear that one day we were both outside, _"You don't know me well." _

"Spot?" I said quietly as not to scare him. He only nodded not bothering to turn towards me. "I was wondering if Sky and I could go to Manhattan tonight. It's his birthday." I watched waiting for a response but none came. He only stood and brushed past me towards the warehouse. "Is that a yes?" I asked as he continued walking without a sound. "Spot?" no answer. "Spot Conlon!" I screamed hoping that this time I would get a reaction. He only stopped walking and glanced towards me his face blank but his eyes showed something else entirely. "Tell me what's wrong." I whispered wishing we could go back to how it used to be. His eyes searched mine and then he shook his head.

"I'll take you to Manhattan, get Sky." He replied disappearing around the corner. I shakily inhaled and pulled myself together before following him.

Spot had left once he was positive we were safely at the Manhattan Lodging house. Of course before leaving he had declared that he would be back around nine o'clock and I felt somewhat relief that he was still protective. Race commented on how he seemed detached from reality and I scowled. I couldn't help but feel it was my fault for leaving that day in the first place. Sky patted me on the back and I smiled weakly pushing aside all thoughts of Conlon for now.

"So what are the plans?" Cowboy asked leaning against the doorframe.

"I'm not sure, I thought we could go out to eat or something." He smiled at me and shrugged turning towards the rest of the crowd that had gathered downstairs.

"Well there is that one bar." Skittery yelled from the stairs.

"Are you crazy, Sky is turning fifteen!" I replied surprised that had even been a suggestion.

"If ya ask me its bout time he drank at a bar!" Skittery countered defending himself.

"Yeah long past due." Race agreed punching Sky in the shoulder. He smiled and turned pleading with me to say yes. I sighed and crossed my arms.

"Fine, but I'm out if the bulls want to arrest us!" there were snickers and Sky placed his arm around my shoulders.

"Don't worry, I'll cover for ya!" he seemed too excited to go drinking with the guys but since it was his birthday I didn't argue any further.

I had never been in a bar before and I was almost afraid to step inside this one. Sky practically dragged me along behind him as we entered. It was loud as the voices of men, women, and music meshed together, not to mention it was packed. "Don't be scared Vaude, I'll protect you." Sky laughed at my anxious expression as he pushed me through the crowd towards the bar. "Now if you don't mind order for me." I narrowed my eyes.

"Order for yourself."

"I'm not sure what to get."

"And you think I'm the expert?" my voice was bitter and he continued to laugh at my expression.

"I would think so." I turned to the bartender who was standing patiently in front of me.

"Can I help you?"

"I would like something to drink." He smiled, "Anything specific?" I shook my head and he reached for a glass filling it up with some type of gold liquid. "One or two?" I held up one finger and he pushed the drink towards me. I nodded my reply and sniffed the concoction before passing it to Sky.

"Would you like to test it for poison?" he mused and I rolled my eyes.

"Just drink the damn thing." I said as I slammed down a couple of quarters and then pushed him away from the bar. The others had already bought drinks and were making attempts at hitting on women. I found a table near the back and Sky and I sat down. "Are you sure this is what you wanted to do?" I inquired watching him gulp down his alcohol.

"Pretty sure, I mean, so far I'm not complaining."

"I bet your mom wouldn't want to hear that you're in a bar drinking for your fifteenth birthday." I mumbled and turned to watch the people. I saw many young boys laughing and dancing with young girls, older war veterans sitting at the bar telling animated stories, bartenders serving newcomers, and young waitresses filling glasses. It all seemed so careless, as if everyone was so _clueless _to the multiple people in the world suffering at this moment, though it occurred to me that almost everyone in here was suffering through something as well. None of them were wealthy, each lived on the streets also, and each had to work for a living. The girls standing near the exit wearing tight clothes trying to get a paying costumer were doing the only thing they knew how to in order to survive, the veterans only had horror stories to tell since the suffering they went through was over with, and same for everyone else in here. Later in life we would all only have horror stories to tell of the experiences that we survived through, _if_ we survived. I turned back to Sky who had finished his drink and was intently staring at me. I hoped with all my heart that Sky would be one of those who would survive, one of the people who grew up on the streets but ended up living in a nice house with a huge family. I knew deep down though that he was a survivor and I smiled knowing that even if I didn't make it, Sky would.

"What?" he asked noticing my sudden change in mood.

"Nothing, just thinking."

"About how much older I look?" he smiled and I shook my head.

"Sure let's go with that." I waved to one of the waitresses and motioned towards the empty glass, she nodded her understanding and I wondered if I really should continue to let him drink. "So what do you want for your birthday?"

"What do you mean?" he asked and I laughed. "You know, for a present." He flushed a little and my smile grew.

"I'm not sure," he said beginning to think. "Actually…I want two things."

"Go on." He leaned in closer to me and subconsciously I leaned away from him.

"First, you have to let me get drunk just for the experience." I laughed and shook my head.

"Spot will prolly kill me." He smiled.

"Maybe, but that usually never stops you." I nodded my agreement.

"Second thing?"

"I want you to kiss me." I stared at him waiting for a laugh or anything to show he was joking, but the only thing there was a very serious expression.

"Sky…" I sighed looking away from him.

"Come on."

"I'm seventeen!"

"Doesn't matter." He replied quickly.

"It does to me."

"It's not your birthday!" he had a point but I still didn't want to.

"Sky, it's not like that with us, we're friends." He studied me and then leaned back in his chair as the waitress set down a pitcher. Pouring himself another glass he almost finished it off in one gulp.

"Is it Spot?"

"What?" I asked surprised that he would be mentioned in this conversation.

"Spot, ya know Brooklyn, is it him?" his face had darkened and I knew he was upset.

"What do you mean?"

"Don't be stupid." He grew louder and I hoped no one had noticed. I doubted it though since the noise in the bar was still much louder than his voice. "Are you and Spot _together_ Vaudeville, Do you _love_ him?" I stared at Sky in disbelief at his acidic tone and the outrageous question he had asked me.

"No, no I don't and we're not together." I replied my voice almost inaudible.

"I don't believe you."

"Believe me."

"I'm not, but I don't care, just leave, I'll meet you back at home later." Slowly I stood and left the table feeling myself begin to fall apart. First Spot, now Sky, who else would push me away?

"Vaude are ya leaving?!" I heard Racetrack call from somewhere far off. I only waved and exited. I hadn't noticed how warm it had been inside and pulled my jacket around me tighter. As I began my walk towards Brooklyn I remembered that Spot was going to come back for me at nine. I wondered what time it was as I changed directions to the lodging house. I figured it was better to just wait for him to get me instead risking a lecture for walking home alone. As I turned the corner I felt myself make impact with another person. I stumbled backwards but the wall caught me before I fell.

"I'm sorry." I said looking up to see who I had run into. Immediately I recognized the black hair and green eyes. "Pirate?" I breathed watching her eyes widen. Quickly she turned and dashed down the sidewalk. Without thinking I ran after her screaming her name. "Pirate it's me Vaudeville! Why are you running?!" It was stupid for me to think that she would stop; maybe I was finally going insane. She said nothing as I desperately ran after her hoping that eventually she would grow tired and stop. A few minutes later it wasn't her who had grown tired. My sides were aching and I could hardly breathe as I abruptly stopped chasing after her. I saw that she had disappeared into the darkness ahead and I realized that I was at the entrance to Bottle Alley. Tears silently fell down my cheeks as I stared blankly forward. Was it a coincidence that she would run here? The one place I was positive that **he** lived? Was this fate that her disappearance might possibly be connected to the very people I was running from? Before I could delve deeper into the thoughts I did not want to think I started running again, this time to somewhere else. Somewhere I knew would accept me with open arms and give me advice. Somewhere that I would be safe.

**A/n: So here it is, another update!! YAY! ahaha. anyway, I hope you guys enjoyed it. The song I wrote this chapter to was "Sing me to sleep." By Waking Ashland. It's pretty good, it kept me going. I love making soundtracks for my stories. review review review! thanks. **


	9. Waiting is over rated

Chapter Nine- Waiting is over rated

In my eyes Queens was no different than Manhattan or Brooklyn. I tried to make sense of the houses that looked the same and I wondered if I would even remember where she lived. As I turned the corner onto another street full of similar homes I saw someone familiar. A small fair haired boy was dashing up the steps towards the entrance of one of the buildings. Briefly I wondered what he was doing out late, but called his name hoping I was correct, "Benjamin!" he stopped and turned around searching for who owned the voice. I smiled and jogged in his direction. At the sound of my shoes on the sidewalk he turned to me and broke out into a toothy grin. I was at the stairs before he could come towards me and I pulled him into a hug. "I haven't seen you since you were…" I trailed off thinking about the last time I had been here.

"Five!" he replied his voice muffled since I was still hugging him. I laughed and released him smiling. "Mama's in the house!" he exclaimed grabbing my hand and pulling me inside. He dragged me up the stairs and pushed open the apartment door. "Mama! Mama!" he yelled still dragging me.

"Goodness sakes Ben! What are you yelling about?" My smile still had not disappeared and I watched as Alice exited the kitchen to the hall we were standing in. I was sure it hadn't registered at first but suddenly she dropped the wooden bowl she had been drying and snatched me up into a hug. "Oh Sherry, oh I thought you were never coming back!" she exclaimed pulling away obviously about to cry.

"Nothing to get worked up about sis." I mumbled hoping this wouldn't turn into dramatics.

"Of course it's something to get worked up about! My sister returns after three years when I was positive she would get herself killed and you expect me to be perfectly calm!?"

"Well please, don't go into hysterics."

"I am certainly not going into hysterics!" Benjamin was snickering next to us and I couldn't help but start to laugh. Alice looked confused but soon joined in on our lively laughter. "Now, what brings you here?" she bent down and retrieved the bowl as she walked back into the kitchen. "Are you planning on living with me like I offered the last time? That would be wonderful, Benjamin constantly asks about you ya know."

"I know." Ben had always thought of me more like a sister than an aunt. I hated how much he was attached to me despite that I had been missing for three years. "But, I'm not here to live." She turned to me her expression pained. I looked away and pulled up my sleeves deciding to help with washing dishes.

"Why not?"

"Alice, I don't want to settle down."

"You're not settling down! You're only living in a home where people love you, why is that so hard for you?" I thought back to the parents that abandoned me and sighed.

"I know you feel guilty for what mama and papa did to me." I whispered hoping Benjamin was somewhere else. He was the last person that needed to hear this conversation. Alice was silent as she dried the dishes that I passed to her. "You don't need to feel that way; I'm not your responsibility."

"That's where you're wrong Sherry." She pulled my hands out of the soapy water and turned me to face her. "You _are_ my responsibility. How could I ever leave my little sister out there on the streets when I have a home big enough for you? Charlie can give you a job at his bakery and you'll be able to spend more time with Ben, and…" she trailed off when she saw my expression. "You don't want any of these things?"

"I'm sorry, it's just…I was never made to have the life you live it doesn't feel right. I love you, Charlie and Ben, believe me I do, but I can't live with you." She sighed and let me go so we could finish up the dishes.

"I can't say I understand but I won't stop ya if you've made your decision."

"Thanks."

"So, is there any special reason for your unexpected visit?"

"I was just curious if I could stay for a couple of days."

"A couple of days as in a week?" I nodded. "Wonderful!" she exclaimed clapping her hands. "Charlie will be so ecstatic that his favorite sister in law is here for awhile."

"Where is he by the way?"

"Oh, he's out delivering some baked goods to his mother. She hasn't been feeling well lately." I nodded and we worked in silence as we finished up our chore. Once we were done Alice led me back to the one other bedroom they had. She lit one of the lanterns after she had closed the door. "It's a little stuffy in here. Benjamin refuses to turn it into his bedroom," She sighed as she walked over to one of the windows pushing it open, "I have no idea why, but I suppose boys will be boys." I smiled as I sat down on the bed. She plopped down next to me wrapping her arm around my shoulders. I leaned my head on her and closed my eyes in contentment. Even if the sky was falling I would feel safe here in my sister's home, listening to Charlie and Benjamin's jokes and Alice's enthusiastic responses to everything. They were the only family I truly had that wanted me, besides the newsies. "So you still haven't told me why you're dressed like a man!" I laughed and sat up glancing down at my outfit. Most of it belonged to Spot, except the shirt which Race had given me from the kindness of his heart, or so he had said.

"I um, have a new occupation." She raised an eyebrow in response and I continued, "I'm a newsboy." She began laughing and stood.

"That makes sense I guess, but really, while you're here I'll lend you some clothes." I didn't argue as she rummaged through the closet behind the bed. She had pulled out three rather pretty dresses and laid them out beside me. "This one belonged to mama." She said pointing to a faded pink one.

"It's pretty." I responded automatically. I never really thought of my mother. The only memory I had was of her screaming for them to take me away. Alice studied my face and I knew she felt guilty for bringing her up. I picked the dark blue dress finally and Alice said she'd sew me more if I wanted extra clothes for when I'd leave. I only nodded saying it was nice of her and she left me so I could change. Slowly I pulled off the newsie cap allowing my blonde hair to fall around my shoulders. My sister and I looked about the same; except she was beautiful with blue eyes and I was average with brown. When I was younger I used to be jealous of her since she had most of the attention. Alice was the golden child who did everything right, and I was the surprise, the mistake my father didn't want to deal with.

It was odd wearing a dress again and I looked at myself in the reflection of the window. I twisted my hair up and clipped it in place with a barrette I found on the dresser. When I emerged from my temporary room Alice was beginning to make bread. She turned as I came to stand beside her and she smiled.

"You look beautiful!" she exclaimed, "Do you feel better?" I nodded and pushed aside the thoughts of the uproar Spot would be in when Sky returned without me.

Spot's POV

I wasn't positive how long I had been waiting but when the newsboys appeared I felt as if I was about to slaughter them all. They were laughing as if nothing was wrong and easily I picked Sky out. Both his arms were draped over Race and Jack and I rolled my eyes.

"Why is he drunk?" I asked aggravated. Race turned to Jack naturally passing the responsibility to his leader.

"We went drinking for his birthday and well, he drank." I kept my face blank as they stopped in front of me and Jack instructed the others to go inside. Suddenly I realized that Vaudeville was nowhere to be found. My aggravation was quickly replaced with rage.

"Where is _she_?" I asked through clenched teeth.

"We're not sure." Jack responded stepping back slightly incase I wanted to throw punches. I closed my eyes and inhaled through my nose attempting to clear my thoughts. "She was at the bar though…for a little."

"Jack, shut up you're not helpin'." I said opening my eyes. "Take him inside and watch 'em for the rest of the night."

"What are ya plannin' on doing?" Race asked pushing Sky over to Jack who dragged him inside.

"Lookin' for her that's what." I said nothing else and began my search deciding the best place to start would be the bar. I couldn't imagine what made her decide to disappear but I hoped it wasn't the same thing as Pirate. As I scanned every alley and stopped a few people now and then I wondered why I cared so much about what happened to her. She was nothing but a pain in my ass but I couldn't help but worry. There were people searching for her, people that I doubted wanted her alive. She was involved in something I didn't understand or knew about and that pissed me off. I was used to knowing what was happening around New York, especially with what was happening with my newsies. I reached the bar and marched inside. It was overflowing with people and I was surprised that this small place could even hold them all. I searched for her but found nothing. Asking people if they had seen her wouldn't help and I exited. As I stood outside I wondered where she could have gone. I started towards Brooklyn thinking that she might have decided to come home, but I doubted she would have done that. Stopping across the street I decided to head towards Bottle Alley. It was the place where the men had attempted to hurt her and I felt the rage I had felt earlier surge through my veins. If they had touched her in any way I would…I stopped my thoughts and stopped walking. I stood frozen for a long time as I thought things through and turned around. Maybe she was safe, maybe I shouldn't worry I told myself as I continued towards Brooklyn. It was plausible that she was sitting in the warehouse right now waiting for punishment. If not, all I could do was wait and I knew that, wait, and search.

"Spot?" I turned to Sky who was standing behind me awkwardly. It had been four days since Vaudeville hadn't come home. Most of my time and energy had been spent searching for her, but I only came up empty handed. Afterwards I left it to my birdies that were scoping the city for any sign but so far no one had found anything.

"What?" I growled wishing he hadn't disturbed me. I had put all the blame of her disappearance on his shoulders so I didn't feel guilty for not staying. He had told me how he had asked for a kiss and what he had said and how she left. In my mind it was his fault that she was gone, his fault I felt this way, but what way was that exactly? He sat down beside me without permission and I moved away turning so I could glare at him.

"I've finally earned enough." I didn't reply. "I'm leaving tomorrow." I had known he had been saving up money to leave and I felt a smile spread across my face.

"Well now isn't that wonderful." I responded my glare disappearing. He was silent as he stared at his hands. Slowly he reached into his pocket and pulled out an envelope with Vaudeville's name scrawled across the front.

"Can you give this to her please?"

"What makes you so sure she's coming back?" I snapped giving into what I thought in the back of my mind. I had seen too many street kids disappear, and too many never return.

"Because she's Vaudeville." He smiled to himself as if sharing a private joke and then his expression went blank. "Just please?" I stuffed the envelope into my own pocket and curtly nodded. "Thanks." He jumped up and inhaled looking at the clear blue sky. "Ya know Spot I'm actually gonna miss this place." He turned to me smiling and I was surprised for a moment, but I never showed it.

"Is that so?"

"Yeah it is." I watched as he walked away and wondered if he was completely sane.

Vaudeville's POV

"Charlie I swear!" I yelled pulling cookie dough out of my hair. Charlie, my sister's husband, was laughing hysterically behind me as he finished mixing the dough. I couldn't help but laugh with him. Like Ben and Alice he was a very warm person. He had dark curly brown hair and dark eyes. My sister had met him when she was helping new immigrants find work. Charlie was from Ireland but not nearly as rough as the other Irishmen. He contrasted greatly with the other burly strong men for he was skinny with only baking as his skill. His mother Fiona had spent most her life teaching him how to cook when she realized she would never have a little girl. He had told my sister that if she couldn't find him a job as a baker than he would most likely starve. Being the type of person my sister is she offered for him to stay with her until she found an opening business and he agreed. Since then it had been fate. "How am I supposed to learn to bake when you keep throwing the ingredients at me?" I asked taking my place beside him once more.

"Sorry it was just so tempting." He replied in his normal Irish accent.

"Well now that we're past that." He laughed, "What happens when you're done with mixing the dough?" I watched carefully as he demonstrated on how to bake them and I followed his instructions to the best of my ability. Throughout placing them on the sheet and pushing them into the oven he made fun of me. I was obviously not the type of person who was born to cook he claimed shaking his head.

"And you're a woman!"

"Hey! Women aren't only supposed to be home makers ya know!" I yelled punching him lightly on the arm.

"You are a perfect example of that." I mocked anger as I flung my arms into the air and dashed for the exit. "Where are ya going?" he asked when I pushed open the door.

"Alice said she wanted my help with making dinner. Tonight is my farewell supper." Charlie frowned when I hung my apron on the hook.

"Why can't ya just stay Sherry?" I sighed deeply as I fixed my hair.

"We've been through this already!" I exclaimed placing my hands on my hips. "I have another life, a life separate from all this." I gestured around the bakery and he shook his head.

"You could give that life up. Is living on the streets really much better than being with us?" I was silent as I thought his question through. _Yes_ I thought but decided not to continue the conversation. I smiled warmly and stepped through the threshold.

"See ya at supper!" Quickly I shut the door dashing down the sidewalk wrapping my jacket around myself. My thoughts strayed to Spot and I wondered how he was. I was surprised that I hadn't heard of any crazy riots in Manhattan after my sudden disappearance, but Sky could have been wrong, I probably didn't mean that much to Spot. I had confided in Alice about the incident in the bar and she grinned when I had finished. She thought Sky sounded interesting and she wanted to meet him. I had to smile at her comment. Sky was indeed interesting, but as far as her meeting him I doubted it. I wanted to keep my street life separate from my peaceful life.

"Vaudeville!?" I stopped and turned subconsciously at the sound of my name. Standing a few feet behind me was a boy I had never met. His black cap was pulled almost all the way over his face and his clothes were clean, too clean for a newsie. I hesitantly stepped backward debating on whether to run or stay. He seemed to read my mind when he extended his hand after spitting in his palm, "Don't worry I'm not gonna hurt you." I spit in my own and we shook. Still on guard I narrowed my eyes as he pushed the hat up so I could see his face. He was only a few inches taller than me and a little bit older.

"How do you know me?" I inquired glancing around for others who might be watching.

"I don't _know_ you personally, but I've seen you."

"Where?" I demanded. He laughed not phased by my hostile response.

"Brooklyn of course."

"Well I've never seen you."

"You're not supposed to see me." I became confused.

"What do you mean?"

"I'm a birdie."

"A what?"

"Birdie."

"What's that?" the word sounded familiar but I wasn't sure of the meaning. I racked my memory and remembered Spot had used it once.

"You could say I'm a spy for Spot."

"So you've been spying on me?"

"No, no only looking for you."

"Well you've found me."

"Indeed." He seemed too civilized, for lack of a better word, to be a newsie and I wondered if all of Spot's spies were similar. He studied me for a moment and broke out into a grin.

"What?!" I glanced behind me half expecting Spot to be there looking like a rapid dog. He shook his head.

"Nothing, anyway, my orders are if I find you to escort you back to Brooklyn immediately." I rolled my eyes.

"Well I'm not going back _immediately_."

"And why not?"

"I'm doing something tonight."

"Do you have a lover?" I almost choked on air at his question.

"No I do not!" I yelled turning and stalking off towards home. He laughed and jogged to catch up and from there on kept easy pace.

"Don't be offended it's only a question."

"A stupid question and I am offended." He followed me until I reached Alice's and I stopped turning to him. "If you don't mind I have supper plans with my sister."

"I don't mind at all, I'll be waiting right here until you're done." My eyes became slits and I crossed my arms.

"Don't you have a life?"

"Not tonight, now if you hurry I could possibly get one once I deliver you safely to Spot."

"Spot? _Safe_?" I began laughing, "Those words don't go together, and Spot will have my head when I get back!"

"Not really my fault, but Spot has had _all_ of our heads since you've been missing so please make it easier on us and hurry up." I had no more time to argue because Benjamin burst through the door asking me why I wasn't upstairs yet. I shrugged off the questions about who I was talking to and pushed him through the door slamming it shut when we were inside.

Supper was nice and I enjoyed the conversation thoroughly. Once I had helped clear and clean the dishes I pulled Alice aside.

"So I guess this is good bye." She said sighing. I nodded and she hugged me tightly. "Sherry please reconsider we would love to have you live with us, and there's this nice boy down the hall your age maybe you guys could become acquainted and just please stay!" I smiled and pulled away from her.

"The boy down the hall is tempting but I might have to pass." She laughed with me and hugged me once more. I felt her warm tears and I tried my best to blink my own back. "Don't cry Alice I swear I'll come back and visit again real soon."

"You better young lady!" Benjamin was in the kitchen before I could call him and I ruffled his hair after our own tear jerking hug.

"You have to come back again!" he said shoving something into my hand. I looked down and saw his favorite penny and smiled. "It's lucky ya know." I nodded and turned to Charlie who already had his arms open.

"I will be missing my baking student." He laughed squeezing me tighter. I patted his back, "No one to throw dough at, what will I do!" I pulled away and smiled,

"Charlie I hope you were not throwing food at her!" I heard Alice yell from my bedroom. We both laughed loudly.

"She has ears like a dog." He mused as she returned to the kitchen holding out a bag. I took it and quickly kissed her on the cheek.

"Take care." I said and before they could really convince me to stay this time I was out the door and down stairs. The boy I had met earlier was still waiting for me and he pushed himself off the wall.

"Ready to go?" he asked and I nodded. "Your family seems nice." He commented trying to make small talk.

"I suppose."

"Why live on the streets if you have them?"

"Why not?" he shrugged still smiling and I sighed. I briefly wondered how good a mood Spot was in as we made our way out of Queens and into Manhattan. Hopefully he would be easy on me. After some careful thought I shook my head. Easy was not in Spot's vocabulary.

**A/n: Alright! jeez, I saw the page count for this and it was 7 pages!! I almost couldn't believe it! Anyway, I hope ya'll enjoy this chapter. Despite the goodbyes I think it was alltogether rather happy. I really love Alice! tell me what ya think of Sherry's family. review review review. Thanks for those who do review! I don't mind if they're long, I like long reviews. If any of you have any constructive criticism I would enjoy reading it, I always like to improve my writing. thanks! **


	10. Best Mistake

Chapter ten- Best Mistake

The boy stopped and I did as well. He leaned against one of the many posts outside of the warehouse and smirked.

"This is how far I have to take you." I nodded feeling the urge to run screaming through the streets. The last person I waned to face was Spot Conlon, especially after a week long disappearance. "What are you waiting for?" he inquired. I shrugged and watched the door carefully waiting for him to burst through at any moment with a pitch fork. "Are you scared?"

"No!" I lied attempting to keep a blank expression. I failed. My emotions were plastered clearly on my face as if I were a book. He smiled and straightened.

"I'll walk you inside, just as a favor." He said as I glanced at his face noticing he was obviously amused.

"What's your name anyway?" I asked trying to buy myself time before facing the raging storm inside.

"Navy."

"Is that your honest name or a nick name?"

"I don't have an honest name." I studied him curiously.

"What do you mean? Everyone has an honest name."

"I'm not everyone." He began laughing and commenced walking forward. I followed him sighing.

"What did your parents name you?"

"I don't know." We stopped at the entrance and as he reached for the knob I stopped him.

"You don't know?" he shrugged my hand that had been holding his off and pushed opened the door. No one was there and I wondered where they all could possibly be. I was half expecting them to be waiting with stones in their hands ready for execution.

"Spot!?" Navy called looking around cautiously. He inched closer to me and gripped my arm leading me towards the steps. "Are you here?!" We waited a little longer until we saw a figure at the top of the stairs.

"I'm here." Spot replied finally and my stomach flipped. Slowly he strolled towards us and I held my breath. Navy pulled us backwards when he reached the bottom and I waited for his reaction. I saw nothing but an empty expression. His hair was loose and fell over his eyes masking anything I might have seen in his eyes. There was no cane in his hands and I wondered why he didn't have his "stick of authority," as he called it. He looked like he had just woken up and I turned to Navy who didn't look alarmed, he still had his usual amused look. "Thanks for bringin' her back." His voice was unnaturally calm and I wondered if he had taken some type of drug, or was possibly drunk. Navy nodded and waved before exiting. I wanted to call out his name as he closed the door but I refrained myself. My gaze finally met Spot's and he had pushed his hair back.

"So I'm back." I said trying to break the awkward silence. He didn't go along he only kept staring intently as if I wasn't real. I bit my lip unable to turn away. "Don't you have anything to say? Are you going to yell at me?"

"No."

"Are you going to say _something_?"

"I don't have anything to say." My mouth fell a little and I became extremely worried.

"Spot, are you alright do I need to call a doctor?" I saw traces of a smile begin and I hoped he would stop this soon. "Spot what's wrong!"

"Would ya like me to yell at you?"

"Yes, oh my gosh yes it's better than this!" I felt myself tear up and I wondered why I was getting so upset. In a sudden movement Spot had his arms wrapped around me squeezing me so tight I could barely breathe.

"Vaudeville don't ever leave me like that again." He whispered. I closed my eyes tightly and the tears disappeared. "I couldn't find ya and I wasn't sure if those other guys had killed you."

"Spot...I was safe I swear." He pushed me away from him and studied my face. His mouth opened and then quickly he closed it. "What?" he shook his head and only hugged me again. We stayed like that for awhile because he refused to release me. Finally he pulled away and I was convinced he was drunk. "Have you been...drinking?" I asked. I heard a loud almost hysterical laugh and then Spot spun around his usual scrutinizing expression in tact. This was the Spot I knew, the Spot that didn't seem so scary compared to the emotional one, the relieved one, the _fearful_ one.

"Do ya really think you're _that_ important?" I smiled.

"Obviously."

"Get over youse self."

"If I can make you act like a _normal_ human being than I can sure as hell make ya drink right?!"

"Wrong. I have more common sense than that."

"Men don't have common sense, especially you."

"I'm not like most men." I narrowed my eyes remembering Navy's response.

"You like to think that but welcome to reality." He rolled his eyes pulling his gray cap out of his back pocket placing it on his head.

"I'm always in reality doll you're the one who has to be welcomed constantly."

"Whatever you bipolar boy." I started up the stairs and Spot jabbed me in the ribs causing me to fall. He caught me from behind.

"I believe I'm more of a man." I blushed at the feel of his arms around my waist and inhaled through my nose. Roughly he pushed me upwards and I dashed up the steps and into my room. "What was that all about?!" he yelled.

"Nothing leave me alone!"

"We have to go to Medda's tonight!"

"When did this happen!?"

"In the week you were missin' in action." He was outside my door and I sighed remembering I had my bag in my hands. Throwing it onto the bed I pulled out the pink dress that supposedly was my mothers. I stared at it for awhile smiling as I thought about burning it. "What are you laughing about?" I heard Spot ask and I jumped. He was standing behind me and I glowered.

"Hey! I didn't say you could come in! And I wasn't laughing."

"I can come in when I want, and I ain't deaf I heard you laughing." I shrugged. "No reason, now get out so I can get changed."

"Don't get all dressed up for some stupid party." He turned and began walking away.

"I'm not getting dressed up! Anyways, Sky told me that he wanted to see me in a dress before he left so I'm fulfilling his wishes." The sound of Spot's shoes against the wood floor stopped and I glanced towards him. He was standing completely still by the door and my eyes grew wide. I knew something was wrong by his stance and I hoped nothing had happened to him the night I left him drunk in the bar. "Is he alright?" I asked my voice full of worry. Spot nodded and I felt somewhat relief as he slowly turned to look at me.

"Vaudeville..."

"What?"

"Sky left. He finally saved up enough to leave." My eyes searched his and I knew he wasn't lying. I clenched my jaw and automatically began walking. I wasn't sure where I was headed but I felt like I needed to find him. "Where are you going?!" Spot yelled following after me.

"I have to find him." I responded monotonously my pace picking up speed.

"He's gone Vaude he ain't coming back."

"He's not gone."

"Yeah, he is now come back here and finish getting changed."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes dammit stop!" Spot had my wrist and he pulled me back to him. I didn't want to cry but I felt guilt. I felt as if it was my fault he decided to leave, my other friend, the other person who understood me who I was close to. Wrenching myself from his grip I stood a few inches away from him. After a few minutes I looked down to see Spot holding a white envelope in front of me. "He wanted to give you this." Hesitantly I accepted it and looked up at him. Spot showed no emotion and I sighed pulling myself together.

"Thanks." I mumbled turning and heading back to the warehouse. "I'll be down in five minutes."

"I'll be waiting, but ya only have five." I rolled my eyes and locked myself into my room. I needed to be alone to read my best friend's farewell, just incase I finally broke down.

I plopped down on my bed and ripped open the top pulling out the white paper. There were multiple ink spots and I smiled realizing he had a hard time in what he wanted to say exactly. Taking a deep breath I began to read:

Vaudeville,

I couldn't find you in time to tell you that I was leaving. Or to tell you something else I've been hiding that I'm sure you know already. So here is what I want to say. You and I both know that at one point I had to leave. I have to find my mom and dad I know you probably feel guilty about the whole thing that happened at the bar, but don't worry. I was the one who was wrong. I am only fifteen. I probably know nothing about being a man, at least compared to Spot Conlon. I doubt I could compete with him and even if you don't realize it yet I see the way you look at him and how he acts around you. Take that however you want. Vaudeville, I want you to come with me, but I don't think you will. So once I've found my family I will return to find you, because I love you, and by then I will be a man. My last request is wait for me.

I hope I see you again,

Sky

I felt the tears and I let out the breath I had been holding. Inside my heart I knew I wasn't going to wait for Sky. I smiled stuffing the letter back into the envelope and pushing it under my pillow.

"It's been five minutes!" I heard Spot scream from outside. Rolling my eyes I quickly changed and dashed down the steps. He was smiling when I came through the door and I stuck my tongue out at him. I knew better than Sky how I looked at Spot, I knew better than anybody that I was in love with him. That was exactly the reason why I to couldn't stay. At some point I had to leave, and it had to be soon.

**A/n: Alright! here's another update. It's only three pages. I felt like it took me forever to even write, I might be landing on some writer's block. Anyways, I think I'm going to have to find new music to listen to or something. Oh! and I lost my idea page so that doesn't help. Maybe tomorrow in Journalism I'll think of something. review review review!! Thanks for the reviews I've gotten so far from ya'll. They're fun to read! **


	11. Bound to Happen

Chapter Eleven- Bound to Happen

Newsies were crowded at the entrance to Irving Hall. Thankfully Spot and I didn't have to push our way through since most of them stepped aside at the sight of him. He was smirking when we made it inside faster than anyone else.

"I hope you're not egotistical all night." I grumbled.

"I can't guarantee anything." I sighed and scanned the overwhelming amount of people searching for anyone I knew. When I caught sight of Race, Mush, and Blink I told Spot where I would be and disappeared.

"Vaudeville!" Mush called waving me over when he noticed me. I doubted anyone could miss the pink dress I was wearing in a sea of browns, blacks, and blues. "How are ya?" he asked giving me a quick hug. "We heard just earlier today that you had been found. Most of us were extremely relieved since we thought we had lost ya like-"he was cut off when Race elbowed him in the side.

"I'm sure glad to see ya too." He smiled and I smiled back and turned to Blink who nodded his agreement with the others.

"So, what's there to do?" I inquired glancing at the others around us. There were numerous girls, but most were already partnered up for the night. I had never been to a large party such as this one nor had I ever met Medda, who according to Race was going to perform.

"I dunno dance?" Race replied through a laugh.

"Oh."

"Well, do ya wanna dance with me?" I turned to him and shook my head.

"I don't dance."

"What do you mean?"

"Exactly what I said."

"I think she means she _can't_ dance." Blink mused his eye sparkling. Race seemed shocked his mouth hanging open. Mush only laughed and sometimes I wondered if he was mentally all there.

"You _can't dance_!?" Race practically yelled and I automatically looked around to see if anyone had looked over.

"Gosh Race is that such a sin?" I asked feeling slightly embarrassed.

"I'm teaching you to dance, right now let's go." He grabbed my wrist and I turned towards Blink and Mush pleading for help. Neither of them obliged they only gave quick thumbs up as Race led me out to a semi empty space.

"Race I don't want to learn! I'm content with watching!" he didn't give in he only placed his cigar on a table and turned back to me.

"Alright, the basics of dancing are-"

"I'm not listening." I interrupted beginning to walk away. "You are too gonna listen!" he yelled following after me. I weaved through the hordes of people wishing that Pirate was present so she could keep him off my back. There had been many times that we both had teased and annoyed Race that he had stopped speaking to us for a whole week! I smiled at the memories and noticed the exit in front of me. I wondered if Spot was monitoring me from somewhere and would demand I not leave the theatre. He hadn't told me any conditions in attending the party and I pushed the door open stepping outside. I hid behind a brick wall pressing myself against it so I was concealed by the shadows. "Vaudeville you are gonna learn to dance one way or another!" I heard Race scream into the street. I stifled a laugh and waited until I believed the coast was clear. There weren't as many newsies outside as there had been when Spot and I first arrived. All I could hear were the distant echo of horse hooves against the cobble stone streets. I inhaled the scent and smiled. Spring was on its way and I could tell by the way the air smelled.

"Too crowded inside?" I jumped and spun around my hand at my throat. The fear I had felt slipped away when I recognized who it was.

"Navy! You scared me." I said lowering my hand and relaxing. He smirked and stood beside me looking up.

"It's a beautiful night." I followed his gaze towards the velvet black sky and smiled.

"Actually it is."

"Winter's almost over."

"I know."

"Spring is my favorite season." I glanced at him.

"That's a coincidence."

"How so?"

"Spring is my favorite season too."

"Well it's a beautiful time." We were silent but I wasn't uncomfortable. He was the first person I could be silent with and it not be awkward. "So you didn't answer my question."

"What?"

"Was it too crowded inside?"

"Oh. No Race wanted to teach me to dance." He began laughing and shook his head pulling out a cigarette. He gestured towards them and I put my hand up signifying I didn't want one.

"That would have been interesting to watch."

"More like disastrous."

"Are you that bad of a dancer?" I shrugged and he took a long drag. When he had blown out the smoke he glanced towards the doors. "Spot was curious as to why you left."

"He sent you out here?"

"Do you think he'd just let you walk out of the building after your previous disappearance?" I narrowed my eyes as I crossed my arms. "That makes you angry?"

"Of course it makes me angry! I don't need to be baby sat!"

"Perhaps that's true." He dropped the cigarette to the ground and stomped on it with his shoe. "But for now why not go back inside?" I contemplated leaving and returning to Brooklyn but that would be boring so I nodded walking back to Medda's. Navy hadn't followed me and I wondered if he was returning to Queens.

Spot was waiting for me when I returned to the room. He was sitting at an empty table and I hoped he wasn't angry that I left. I plopped down in the chair next to him and noticed that Medda was performing. She was pretty for an old woman I definitely hadn't expected that.

"Navy has a way of finding you and making you return."

"It's not Navy who makes me come back Spot." He looked at me and I caught his gaze. For a moment I thought he had understood my underlying meaning since his eyes widened slightly. Then as quickly as I noticed the change of his expression he slipped back to a blank face.

"Race told me ya can't dance." he smirked and I rolled my eyes hoping he hadn't spread it to the whole world. Then I remembered him screaming out into the street.

"I guess." Medda waved goodbye and left the stage. Different music played now and the newsies went back to their pairs.

"Spot." We both turned to see Jack standing beside him. "I need to talk to you." His face was serious and Spot nodded.

"I'll be back." He said to me before leaving with him. I watched until they disappeared behind stage and I turned back to the other newsies. Closing my eyes I thought of Pirate as I listened to the music. Before I could get too nostalgic someone interrupted my thoughts.

"Excuse me?" My eyes flew open and I looked towards the sound of the voice. A tall boy was standing next to me smiling. He had short dark red hair and brown eyes. I had never seen him before so I guessed he was either a random person or a newsie from somewhere else.

"Yes?" I asked suddenly feeling nervous.

"Would you dance with me?" I sighed expecting that at some point I would have to dance tonight. At least Spot wouldn't be able to see me mess up.

"Um, sure." I replied not wanting to hurt his feelings. He smiled and I took his hand as he pushed his way into the crowd. At that moment the fast music turned slow and I clenched my teeth. This felt like it was going to be long and unbearable. He wrapped his arm around my waist and the other held my hand. My other hand was on his shoulder and we began swaying to the music. I stumbled a little but he continued smiling and I felt my cheeks turn red.

"How old are you?" he asked and I knew he was trying to make me feel less nervous.

"Seventeen."

"I'm nineteen." I nodded scanning the crowd for Spot. I didn't see him and I felt relieved as I tripped over his feet.

"I can't dance..." I mumbled and he laughed.

"I noticed." I felt extremely self conscious as we continued. It seemed he felt my sudden tense posture and chuckled, "Don't get offended I think it's cute."

"What?" I looked at him and his face contorted into something evil. I knew then his intentions and tried to pull away.

"Oh, don't be afraid I'm not going to hurt you." He whispered pulling me closer to him. Striker's amused face flashed inside my mind and I began struggling. "Stop." He said constricting his arms around my waist. I could barely breathe as I felt us move. "How about we get out of here huh?"

"How about not?" he stopped suddenly and his arms loosened. I knew that voice and I felt euphoric when Spot pushed the boy away from me. He didn't complain as he left and I threw my arms around Spot's neck.

"Spot I've never been so happy to see you!" his arms hesitantly wrapped around me. I pulled away to look at his face and I noticed that it had turned slightly red. "Are you blushing?" I was astonished and he glared at me.

"No I'm not." He replied in an indifferent tone. I smiled and buried my face into his shoulder. That was when I felt us moving. I jerked back and realized we were dancing. Once I had noticed I stepped on his foot and my face turned red.

"I can't dance!" I exclaimed wishing that everyone would believe me.

"Well everyone's gotta loin sometime." The blush had disappeared and he looked like the same Spot.

"Spot!"

"No complaints just follow my lead and don't think." I relaxed and tried to keep along with his rhythm. Soon we were moving together and I hadn't stumbled or stepped on his feet. "See you trusted me and now you can dance imagine what would happen if you trusted me all the time."

"When did trust ever become an issue?"

"It's an issue between us all the time."

"About what?"

"Why you're here, why those guys are looking for you, and how you feel."

"Because I don't tell you don't mean I don't trust you."

"That's not how I perceive it."

"Well perceive it differently." He smirked and pushed a strand of hair behind my ear. My face flushed and I tried to control my sudden rush of emotions. The last thing I wanted Spot to know was how I felt. It would ruin everything and then I would have to tell the truth. His eyes searched mine and I looked away.

"Sometimes I don't think you realize."

"Realize what?" I mumbled noticing Race smiling at me. I turned away and regretted it since I caught Spot's gaze.

"How pretty you are." I stopped breathing and my heart almost pounded out of my chest. He laughed and pulled away from me when the song ended. "We're gonna leave soon so go say goodbye to ya friends." He motioned towards Race and I nodded as he walked away. _Don't make it a big deal_ I thought to myself _He doesn't mean anything by it_. Sometimes it was hard to convince yourself the opposite of what you wanted, and I wanted Spot. I wanted him to want me, but I doubted it. Race was patting me on the back when I reached him claiming I almost danced like a pro and next time he would teach me much more complicated things. I hoped that there wouldn't be a next time and waved goodbye not looking forward to the long walk back to Brooklyn which would most likely be silent and awkward.

Navy's POV

I pushed open the almost non existent door to the apartment building. Passed out men were lying on the steps as I descended the stairs making my way to the third floor. I heard yelling and loud noises coming from behind the last door at the end of the hallway and knew that was my destination.

"Boss!?" I called feeling disgusted as I entered his home. Usually I was used to a well kept house with servants waiting to help me with whatever I needed. "Are you in here!?"

"Yeah, yeah quit your yelling!" I heard him growl as he entered the room. There were multiple people clustered around and I noticed Benson and Slims as the men I was supposed to partner up with. "You found her?"

"Yes." The chatter in the room died down and there was complete silence as the boss wanted more information. "She's back in Brooklyn."

"Interesting, well can you lead her over here?"

"I'm not sure." I felt dirty for what I was doing. It was wrong and I knew it but I couldn't stop now. There was something I had to do. This seemed to be the only way I could get what I wanted but in the process I had to destroy someone else's life.

"You better find a way to be sure Navy."

"I have an idea and I think we should use Pirate." He smiled and motioned for Slims to retrieve her. We waited until he returned with the battered girl. The reasons for why Pirate was brought here were unclear to me. Though I had never been interested enough to ask.

"What's your idea?" the boss inquired smiling at the young girl next to him. Pirate was wary as I stepped closer to her.

"Pirate?" she nodded once, "Can you do me a favor?" when she didn't reply I continued. "I need you to lead Vaudeville here so that we can ambush her."

"No." she responded looking at her feet. I knew she was fighting within herself. A moral battle I had once fought as well.

"If you do this we'll consider your debt cleared." The boss said touching her arm lightly. She turned to him and her expression was clearly pained.

"I would rather continue to work for you than betray her." He backhanded her across the face.

"Consider this your next job then." There was silence and I smiled. I felt as if I was one step closer to my goal.

"Boss," he looked towards me, "I'll return with the full plan next time, but for now just think of ideas."

"Sure, sure." I touched Pirate's cheek gently before leaving. I felt bad for using her but I pushed the thoughts away. Vaudeville's face flashed inside my mind and I smiled. "Sorry." I mumbled swiftly walking back to Queens.

**A/n: Ooo, twist! ahaha. So I'll try my best to update after this. Amazingly The Spill Canvas inspired me enough to write this chapter. It's 5 pages! woot! review review review! **


	12. Breakdown

Chapter Twelve- Breakdown

I was staring blankly at the ceiling holding my stomach. Recently I had caught some type of cold and I had been locked inside the lodging house for two weeks now. By the way I felt I was positive that the worst was over and I could begin eating normal meals. With new determination I stumbled out of bed and dragged myself over to the window. Using all my strength I wrenched it open and inhaled the air. It smelled like fish, water, and other familiar scents that defined the city. Spring was finally here and I loved every moment of it. The weather was nice and I desperately wanted to leave the warehouse and travel over to Manhattan. I placed my elbows on the window sill and rested my chin in the palm of my right hand. It was peaceful as I scanned the scenery and I enjoyed the moment. I knew that my time here in Brooklyn and Manhattan was coming to an end. Sooner or later my past would catch up to me. Turning away from the window I sat cross legged in front of Spot's suitcase and searched for clothes. Jack had given me two new pairs of gray pants and three extra shirts. Today I decided that I would wear a dress and I retrieved the peach colored one my sister had given me. I pulled it on and tied the black ribbon around the waist in the back. It was a beautiful dress and I assumed she had worn it to church many times. Once I had finished changing I entered the boys' room and washed my face. There was a small mirror behind me and I turned undoing my matted hair from the bun I had messily placed it in. Since I had gotten sick I kept it up and it showed. Picking up a random brush I began attempting to smooth out the snarls. After what I was sure was an hour I had finally accomplished my mission. My hair felt silky as I ran my hand through it and I smiled. There was an entirely different person staring back at me in the reflection, a more presentable person. I returned to my room and pulled on my boots. Today would be the day I did not portray myself as a man or as a newsie. Quickly I scrawled a note to Spot and left it on my bed sure he would discover it. Then I dashed out of the warehouse and swiftly made my way through Brooklyn.

Manhattan Mental Facility was one of the many asylums we had around New York, but one of the few that hadn't been moved out of the city. I stood at the bottom of the stairs my eyes transfixed on the door. Swallowing the lump in my throat I slowly climbed the steps. Pushing open the door the familiar scent of medicine, sweat, urine, and blood filled my nostrils and I held my breath for a moment. It had been at least two years since I had been dragged off to this very building. Fixing my face into a composed expression I found the main desk and smiled at the nurse behind it. She turned to me disregarding the smile.

"May I help you?" her voice sounded bored and my smile faded.

"Ah yes I would like to see a patient."

"Are you family?"

"I am."

"Patient's Name?"

"Caroline Brown." She disappeared into a back room and I leaned against the counter. I felt like I was exerting tremendous physical and mental energy to do what I was doing. The nurse reappeared and I stood.

"What relation are you to her?"

"I am her daughter."

"Your name then?"

"Sherry Brown." She opened the book she was holding. I assumed it was my mother's paper work as she skimmed the records.

"I will have someone escort you to her room," She pointed to a bench across from her, "Sit there until he comes." I followed her instructions and lowered myself onto the hard wood. As I glanced around the main office I relived countless memories. I thought it ironic that my mother, the woman who despised 'crazy people' would end up placed here.

"Are you Sherry Brown?" I glanced up and felt something warm and wet slip down my cheek. I wiped away the tears and nodded.

"Yes I am." The man looked concerned but he did not ask me what was wrong.

"Follow me." I cleared my throat smoothed out my dress and fixed my hair as I followed behind him. We passed multiple rooms and I felt my stomach flip as we began slowing down. Briefly I wished Spot was with me, holding my hand and making me feel like I could actually do this. It had been six years since I had confronted my mother. He unlocked a door that led to another hallway. At this time we were going through many locked doors until he reached a rusty metal one. Steel numbers had rust creating lines from underneath them that read 1023. "She's in here, but I suggest you be careful she's very delusional."

"Delusional?"

"You'll find out what I mean."

"Will she remember me?"

"Possibly, I'll be waiting right here."

"Time limit?" he shook his head and unlocked the final door. The creaking noise echoed through the hall and I shuddered. Slowly I stepped into the semi darkness of the cell my mother had been in for the last year.

She was curled up on her bed that only contained a mattress. Around her were different items such as dolls and half burnt pictures. Dirty dishes were staked up in a corner and a bucket with flies around it was sitting across from it. For the first time I felt compassion for my mother and closed my eyes. I hadn't noticed the man shut the door but suddenly my eyes adjusted to the little light inside. My mother's usual brown hair was black and four huge knots was what it was now. She was sickly looking and had lost a lot of weight since I had seen her. Working up the courage I finally spoke in a raspy voice that was not my own.

"Mom?" she didn't move and for a fraction of a second I was sure she was dead. "Mom?!" I said louder hoping she would twitch or something along those lines. Slowly but surely her arms pulled away from her knees and she lifted her head to stare at me. Her eyes were dark and her face had tear streaks through the dirt on her cheeks. "Do you know who I am?" I couldn't stop the tears and everything I held in for the past years of my life was seeping out.

"No." My eyes automatically closed and I didn't think they would ever open. My breathing was strained and after every two seconds it came out in gasps. "Who are you?" It was as if it wasn't possible for me to answer her. I shook my head and she spoke again louder and unrecognizable. "Are you deaf? Who.are.you?"

"Sherry, Sherry Brown." She was silent and I looked up wiping my face. Her eyes were narrowed.

"I don't know any Sherry."

"Mother I'm your daughter."

"No I only have one child and you are not her."

"Mom you have two and I-"

"Shut up! Keller do you hear this stupid girl?" she turned away from me and looked to her left. It was only thin air and I did not see anyone else there. I was confused for a few minutes and then I remembered she suffered from delusions. "I know, I should call the staff members she's obviously insane."

"Mom I know you recognize me!" I screamed feeling that if she said she did, if she apologized everything I had done would be forgiven. My mother was the judge and this was my final judgment.

"Keller listen to her!" she screamed throwing an apple core towards me. I didn't have time to dodge it and stumbled backwards at the impact of it on my forehead. "Get out right now I don't want to hear anymore of your nonsense!" By this time I crumbled to the floor my hands over my face. "Do you hear me?!" Suddenly I felt two hands grab my hair and pull me forward. "Hey girl!?"

"I hear you mom." I opened my eyes and saw a hand fly towards my face. I could feel the sting after it happened.

"I am not your mother! I never was!"

"You do remember me." I stated as I saw tears create new streaks in the dirt.

"Never." She breathed yanking my hair. Pulling her hands away I could see thick strands of my blonde hair twined around her fingers.

"Mother...I'm not the screw up you were positive that I would be."

"Shut up! Keller!"

"I'm not, I'm in love, I'm a better person!"

"You can never love you are a worthless child! You are dirty and you will never understand anything get out of my room now or Keller will escort you out!" With another smack she crawled away from me back to her mattress. If looks could kill I would have been lying on the ground life sucked out of me. My mother's glares brought up multiple memories as she began screaming for Keller to hurt me. "Kill her! Kill her now! She sent me here she's the reason! She killed those people, she killed the..." she had no time to finish I had slammed the door shut and was in the hallway. The man stood from the chair he had been sitting in and locked the door. We could still hear her screaming from inside and he shook his head.

"She'll do that until she bleeds." He muttered to himself and led me up from the depths of the insane asylum and back towards the other world outside. The office nurse nodded to me but I couldn't say anything. When I exited the building I felt the sobs coming but I tried to push them down. As I looked down the steps I noticed a familiar person glaring at me. I couldn't smile in fact I couldn't feel much of anything. At my final step I saw him open his mouth to most likely lecture me but instead he snatched me into a hug.

"Spot...take me home please." He pulled me along with him my arms locked around myself trying to hold the pieces together. I knew that it was a matter of time before I broke down, a matter of time. Before I realized it Spot had pushed me down onto my bed and as I opened my mouth to say 'thanks' all I could do was scream. The agony I felt inside was unbearable and I thought it would never end. I had seen my mother at her worst; I had seen my past and every component of myself in the basement of the asylum. Was that where I would end up? My mother had lied and said I wasn't her child, was I really worthless? I felt Spot's arms and they only delivered a small amount of comfort, but the happiness he would make me feel was engulfed in the darkness of my childhood. She mentioned my crime, she knew my secret. The only thing keeping me sane were the newsies and now they were fading into my mistake. For a moment I thought I heard Spot singing to me softly and then I thought, and felt nothing.

**A/n: This chapter is not a lot, but I felt like it took forever to write!! I'm sorry its short the next one will be a little longer, and I'll try to organize myself for more time, and I'm a bleeding heart. Today during my set writing time a stray cat came into the yard and I couldn't just leave her there! so I had to feed her and stuff. She's nice! I named her Neko (I guess Cat isn't an original name, but oh well). She curled up in my lap and then I was in love! review review review! THANK YOU FOR THE REVIEWS YOU HAVE GIVEN ME THOUGH! I LOVE EM!!**


	13. Make your move

Chapter Thirteen- Make your move

I felt the small splash of water on my face and looked up. The clouds were black and I knew a storm was brewing. Spot had told me a few days earlier that there would be a severe thunderstorm and to make sure all the younger Brooklyn newsies were inside before it rained. He was at some function in Manhattan tonight with the rest of the newsies and women weren't allowed. I knew this only because he had not told me not to come along. Ever since I had returned from the asylum Spot kept me glued to his side whenever he was around. I hadn't been able to completely emerge from the newly acquired darkness in my heart and spent most of my time not selling and lying in bed. From what I understood Spot paid for my room and board and I felt guilty. I stood wrapping my quilt around me tighter and calling in the newsies I was put in charge of. At first they didn't listen but when it began to pour they dashed inside. I laughed at their soaked appearances and sent them to get washed up and changed. Slowly I made my way to one of the empty tables in the front room and plopped down sighing.

"What's wrong?" I turned and smiled at Dusty. He was the youngest Brooklyn newsie at the age of seven. When Sky had left somehow he comforted me by reminding me of my young friend. They didn't look the same but personalities were similar.

"Nothing." I replied ruffling his dirty blonde hair.

"You've been actin' weird for awhile now and I know it ain't nothing!"

"Come on, would I ever lie to you?" He shook his head his chocolate brown eyes became slits as he scrutinized me. I kept my expression cheery praising myself for almost mastering the trick of keeping my face blank. After a few minutes he beamed and gave me a quick hug.

"Of course you wouldn't!" I patted his back and he pulled away resting his small hand on my shoulder. "Cheer up Vaude, life is worth livin'!"

"When did you become so smart huh?!" I punched him lightly and he pulled away pretending as if he were boxing me. When we had stopped laughing another newsie called his name and he quickly waved taking the stairs two at a time. Most likely they were playing some type of card game upstairs. I settled back into the silence of downstairs and began to think. The only time I thought was when I was alone and that was when the battle I felt inside would rage as if it always continued. This time the battle was the memory of something I had tried to repress all these years. I knew what would follow when that memory was over but I allowed myself to see them. Clenching my fists I slipped into my past hoping that I would be able to resurface.

_The nurses on duty jumped at the blood curdling scream echoing from inside room 206. _

"_Who's getting her this time?" one of the old nurses inquired organizing papers into a separate folder. There were murmurs of 'not me' and the newest member glanced around at their faces. _

"_Get who?" she asked curious as to why they didn't want to take care of this particular patient. She was positive that caring for mentally insane people day after day might be tiring but to ignore someone screaming was unheard of. There were snickers and the head nurse smiled. _

"_Sherry Brown of course." The new girl shook her head. "You haven't heard of her?" the other nurses urged her to continue and she quickly fell into the story. "Well apparently she's one of the craziest patients here. Her mother practically threw her at us and since then we've been taking care of her. The poor girl is only twelve and if you ask me really not that mentally insane just severely abused." The new nurse turned her head to the continuing screams. _

"_Then why is she considered the craziest?" _

"_Oh I'm not sure. I think it has something to do with a recent death here of one of our patients Amanda Martin." _

"_What happened to Amanda Martin?" _

"_She had been hung in the dining hall one afternoon." A new person said taking the place as narrator. "They say that she and Sherry had an awful fight right before her death and some patients even claimed they saw her tying the sheets around her neck!" There were more murmurs and nods of agreement. _

"_Well we can't just leave her there to scream!" the new girl exclaimed checking the hallway once more this time more afraid. _

"_Why don't you take care of her then?" _

"_No way!" she was terrified now after the story but tried to comfort herself saying there were worse patients._

"_Yes way, go ahead here's the room key. Trust me she won't hurt you, just tell her its okay." The head nurse pushed her out from behind the desk and hesitantly she headed towards the screaming. Swallowing her fear she unlocked the door and slipped into the dark room. The poor girl was curled up in a ball on her mattress screaming as loud as she could. _

"_Um, excuse me?" she said cautiously stepping closer to the form. The screaming continued and she spoke louder. "Sherry?" Suddenly she stopped and her head snapped up her dark eyes wide and afraid. "I won't hurt you I swear I'm a new nurse, Nurse Hannah." She was silent and watched as Hannah moved closer and finally sat on the edge of her bed. Shakily she extended her hand to brush back some of the wet blonde strands of hair. "What are you screaming about honey?" she shook her head and curled back up. "Please tell me so I can help." Her hands snatched her arms and tightened. Hannah gasped at the sudden movement and almost screamed herself. She was taught in class not to make any sudden movements around the mentally ill and froze. _

"_Don't let them take me away..." the young girl whispered glancing back up. Their gazes locked and Hannah became concerned. Was she delusional? _

"_Who sweetie?" _

"_It doesn't matter who, but they'll come for me don't let them take me away!" she began screaming again and Hannah wrapped her into her arms. _

"_Shh, I won't I swear I won't let them get you." Finally after comforting her for awhile she fell asleep and Hannah found a blanket to wrap around her. She exited and found the nurses again who seemed impressed she stopped the girl from making anymore unnecessary racket. "Is anyone coming to discharge her?" there were glances around and the head nurse nodded slightly. _

"_Tomorrow her uncle is coming; he says that they will take on full responsibility of her care and good health from now on." Hannah wondered if these were the people that abused her. _

"_Really?" there were nods. "Does Sherry not like them?" _

"_Not that we know of, did she say 'don't let them take me' to you?" Hannah nodded reluctantly. "Oh don't worry about that she says that all the time, her uncle seemed fine when I spoke to him." She pulled out a folder and thrust it into Hannah's hands. "Now to continue with your transfer, your ward is in the other building behind this one. Thanks for watching over Sherry tonight!" they waved her off and Hannah hoped Sherry would be alright. _

_The next day Uncle Seth discharged her. As he waited at the front of the asylum he mulled over his plans. Sherry was escorted down the halls fully dressed in presentable clothing a suitcase in her left hand. Bandages were wrapped around her palms from digging her nails into them this morning. She was well aware of whom her uncle was and the fear of being sent off with him was near unbearable. When she saw his smiling face she turned to run but the staff members grabbed her arms dragging her over. _

"_Here she is Mr. Larson." He nodded and took Sherry's arm roughly pulling her towards him. "Please keep in mind her condition and we wish you both luck, goodbye Sherry!" the head nurse called as she motioned for the staff to leave. Sherry wanted to scream again but her throat was sore and she had lost her voice. Seth pulled her out of the asylum and down the sidewalk. They had walked a long ways when they reached a run down place. There was a large apartment building coming into view and he pushed her in and up the steps. His home was trashy and multiple men were sitting around laughing and drinking. Uncle Seth as he called himself pushed her to the floor at his feet and whistled. All the attention was on both of them and Sherry crossed her arms trying to contain her heartbeat. _

"_Welcome Sherry to the family boys!" he called and before she knew it she was snatched from the ground and taken to a back room. They threw her onto the bed and she opened her mouth to scream. The only sound she could make was silence and she shut her eyes trying to find a happier place as they 'welcomed' her. Why would her mother ever send her here? What did she ever do to deserve this? Was she a bad child? Did she do something wrong? _

I could feel myself being shaken and suddenly I snapped out of my daze. Spot was at my side his hands firmly wrapped around my shoulders. His eyes were full of concern but he was scowling. I looked to see the rest of the Brooklyn newsies standing around attempting to show that they weren't listening.

"Vaudeville." He said his voice quiet but demanding, demanding the truth.

"Spot." I tried to sound the same but instead my voice cracked and I inhaled and exhaled. He helped me up letting the quilt fall at my feet. I was still wearing the same dress never bothering to change and I was sure I smelt bad. He led me upstairs to my bedroom closing the door behind us and letting me sit down.

"You have to snap out of this sometime." He said studying me. I unclenched my fists and saw the blood beginning to pool at my nail wounds. Spot had placed his hands over mine and I lifted my eyes to his. "What's wrong?" He was sincere and I knew it. I couldn't drag him down with me.

"I have to leave Spot." I choked out finally breaking away from his gaze and pulling my hands away from his.

"What?"

"I have to leave, there's somewhere I have to go now. Something I have to...finish." It was time for me to leave. Everything I had lied about was on the verge of being exposed and it was time to run away once more run back to him like always. I felt him grab my arm when I began placing my clothes into a bag. He turned me around and I noticed anger.

"No there is nowhere for ya to go!" his voice rose and I bit my lip.

"Spot you don't understand I knew this was only...temporary."

"You were dying Vaudeville!" I felt the tears and I hung my head trying to slip away from him. "Don't lie to me I told ya once you would have to tell me everything and I've given ya more than enough time!"

"Spot stop, nothing is wrong!"

"Bullshit!" He was yelling now and I cringed when he came closer to me. "You were screamin' just a few moments ago downstairs, screamin' for someone to stop, screamin' that ya were a good kid screamin' a lot of things!"

"I'm sorry."

"Don't!" he started to yell again but lowered his voice so it was gentle. "Don't apologize just let me help you, let me protect you." I wondered if Spot cared about me the same way I cared for him. Quickly I pushed the thoughts away and tried to convince myself different. I didn't need a protector, I didn't need Spot to suffer it was the last thing on my list.

"There's nothing for you to protect me from." I held myself together, something I was usually never able to do and continued packing.

"The hell there isn't!" he tried once more to grab me and turned me to face him. I didn't want to look into his eyes; I didn't want him to convince me to stay. I was falling and I knew it and there was no way I would break in front of the newsies. Seth would never stop looking for me I knew too much and he needed it, he needed me.

"Spot let me go!"

"No!"

"Why do you care so much!?" I screamed finally meeting his gaze. He seemed surprised by the sudden question. By his reluctance I knew he didn't know the answer himself and his arms fell to his side. I felt a small twinge of pain and stepped away. Forgetting my bag I left dashing down the stairs and out into the rain. Walking as fast as I could I began sobbing. It felt as if Spot had rejected me. Of course it was silly to think such a thing and finally I stopped walking. There were very few people outside and I tried to control my breathing. I reached up to push the wet hair from my face and felt two arms encircle my waist. Gasping I went to turn around but they kept me in place.

"It's me." Spot whispered and I stopped struggling. My heart slowed and I wondered what he was doing out here. We were silent and I leaned against him suddenly feeling weak. "You want to know why?" I jumped when he spoke and slowly nodded my head. I assumed he was talking about the last thing I screamed at him before I left the warehouse. He pulled his arms away and rested them on my shoulders turning me around. Our eyes met and they locked. Suddenly my pulse quickened and he filled the space between us. At first I was surprised and then wrapping my arms around his neck we deepened the kiss. There were no words I could think that could describe the moment. It was almost as if everything clicked. Pulling away we were both breathing heavily and he smirked. I wasn't positive what my face expressed and I was slightly worried at what I was giving away. At that moment we were both vulnerable and I waited until he spoke. "I don't want you to leave. The truth is I don't want to know what it's like not to see you again. I'm not the type of person who _cares_ that much about anyone otha than my boys and to realize that I'm actually afraid that I won't eva see you again when you walk out the door is aggravating." He paused closing his eyes and I could tell this was hard for him. When he opened them again I couldn't distinguish what they expressed. "At some point Vaudeville I fell for you. So the reason why I care so much is because I love you." The darkness I felt inside slowly started to recede and I smiled.

"I don't think I need to tell you how I feel." I replied and he laughed brushing his fingers along my cheek.

"Yeah, I think I know already." Blushing I wondered if it really had been that obvious. "Maybe that was partly the reason why I didn't understand the point in ya leaving." Against my will the world was returning and I had to face reality once again. He detected my sudden change in mood and hugged me tightly. "You're not still leaving are ya?" How could I? Spot couldn't have picked a better time to tell me that he loved me than the moment I knew it was time to face Seth.

"I'm...not sure." He pulled away his expression blank.

"What do ya mean?"

"Spot just because you confessed your feelings doesn't mean I'm going to stay." His jaw tightened and I sighed. "You don't understand."

"You're right I don't!" he started yelling again and I wished I could have kept my mouth shut. "Vaudeville there is something you're hiding and for some unknown reason ya won't tell me what the hell is going on with you!"

"Because it's not important!"

"It is important, anything that will take you away from me is important!" I groaned placing my hands over my eyes. "Don't get frustrated with me!"

"I'm not frustrated at you!" Turning my back to him I ran through my thoughts attempting to make a choice. Nothing bad could possibly happen if I stayed a little longer. It would give me plenty of time to say goodbye to Spot before dashing off to end the debt I had with Seth. I felt Spots hands on my shoulders and I sighed noticing the rain had stopped and we were both standing soaked completely through. I glanced up towards the sky and saw the rainbow arching over the Brooklyn Bridge. "Spot, look." I pointed towards the rainbow and Spot followed my gesture. "Isn't it beautiful?" When he never replied I assumed he nodded and took that as a sign. "Let's get back to the warehouse." I pulled away from him. As I brushed past him I looked up to see him smiling and I couldn't help but smile back. We walked silently together and I for the first time in a week I felt as if I had everything I could possibly want.

Before another week was over everyone knew that Spot and I were more than just friends. We both weren't very huge on public display of affection and kept everything at a minimum. Occasionally if it was just Spot and I walking he would hold my hand. Nothing eventful had happened and I asked Spot if I was allowed to go to Manhattan to sell for a day. After my weeks of absences from working I was determined to pay back all the money Spot had spent on me. Manhattan was one of the best places to sell and I knew it was a good argument to make if Spot protested.

"I guess." He said when we were eating supper one night. Randomly he had decided to take me out to one of the small restaurants a few blocks away from the warehouse. I felt he just wanted time alone with me since most of the newsies documented our every move. Racetrack had told me that it was rare to hear of Spot having a relationship with anyone and for a long time some of the boys believed he was attracted to men. Unfortunately for Race Spot had been within ear shot and he received a nice shiner for that comment.

"I promise I won't get into any trouble!" I exclaimed excited that I could leave the confinements of Brooklyn without Spot stepping on my heels. He rolled his eyes taking a large bite of his sandwich.

"That'll be the day."

"Shut up!" I threw a wadded napkin at him and he smiled. Returning the smile I turned back to my food and exhaled through my nose. These were the best times of my life and I knew nothing could top any of the moments I had lived in.

"Ya know I'm gonna give ya guidelines though right?" I moaned and picked at my spaghetti.

"I already _know_ your guidelines!" I complained dropping my fork and taking a sip of my water.

"It doesn't matter. Reviewing makes ya smarter." Our dinner concluded with my 101 rules on what to do when he wasn't around and I felt like a child under the age of thirteen.

"I think I know how to take care of myself." I said when we were heading back home.

"Ya should know by now I don't care."

"Yeah I should." I mumbled already deciding I was breaking some of my 'guidelines'.

Manhattan was beautiful in the springtime and I beamed when I saw Race, Mush, and Blink sitting together in Central Park.

"Hey!" I called waving and they waved back. Swiftly I made my way over to them papers already in hand. "What are ya doing?" I inquired when I saw they had no newspapers.

"We decided to take a day off." Mush smiled leaning back on the bench for emphasis.

"Why didn't ya tell me?" they all shrugged and I looked down at my stack of twenty. "Will ya help me sell these anyway? I really need to pay Spot back." There were moans but Race hit Blink and Mush in the back of the head simultaneously and I laughed. "Thanks." A little past noon I had sold all of my papers and felt good about myself. "See it wasn't that hard!"

"Yeah, but it was our day off." Blink replied bitterly.

"Get over it we still have hours." Race scanned the area we were in and gasped.

"Don't do that!" Mush exclaimed the only person who had jumped out of surprise for the sudden sound from the short Italian.

"Ya know there's a place where we can get cold ice tea for free!"

"Oh where!?" I asked immediately excited. I had always loved ice tea. Alice usually made it for me regularly during the summer months and I felt a small twinge of 'home sickness' for them. If I played my cards right it would be possible for me to visit them before I faced my demons. He pointed to a shop and we followed his lead. Stopping us in front of the door he explained that he would need help carrying the drinks out and the woman who made it only liked familiar faces. "So you want me to wait out here?" he nodded and I sighed. "Fine, just hurry up."

"You owe us anyway for helping you sell." Race stated and I agreed even though waiting outside by myself, breaking guideline number ten of Spot's, wasn't that big of a deal. They disappeared into the shop and I sat on the steps in front of the door. It was unseasonably warm outside and I removed my hat. Thankfully I had twisted my hair up before I left the warehouse. As I scanned the passing crowds of people I recognized someone. I blinked multiple times remembering that the last time I had seen this person was awhile ago and I was led to a dead end. Glancing back at the door I decided to follow them in silence hoping they would lead me to where they have been for the past months. Pirate was a brisk walker and I was out of breath after only a few minutes. It was hard to keep sight of her and push my way through the crowds going in opposite directions. Finally she paused and turned into a building. I looked around comforted that I was still in Manhattan and recognized the building as the bar Sky and I had come to for his birthday. I couldn't fathom why she would ever come here in the middle of the day but continued on. There weren't many people as I scanned the room. She was nowhere to be found and as I turned to leave I felt a hand cover my mouth and strong arms pull me backwards and out the back door. They released me and I tumbled to the ground.

"Good to finally see you again, Sherry." I froze and my eyes widened. I could tell he noticed my sudden rigid form by the sound of his heartless laughter. "I guess you still do remember me." I stood shakily brushing dirt off of my clothes. Then slowly I turned to face **him**, Seth.

**A/n: Alright updated chapter!! It was rather quick if ya ask me. I enjoyed writing this since I LOVE mushy love confession scenes. I attempted to fit Spot's confession to his character so please tell me if ya think it sounded like him. OH! and was the flashback alright? I didn't feel like explaining her past, and if ya'll like it say so because I might put more in. or not. Thank you so much for those of you who review! talk to you guys later. **


	14. Can't be saved

**Disclaimer: I do not own anyone familiar from the wonderful musical 'Newsies.' **

Chapter Fourteen- Can't be saved

We were facing each other our faces blank. A slight wind stirred the few strands of hair that had escaped my clip. My eyes shifted to Pirate who was standing awkwardly in the shadows shuffling her feet. It was obvious this was the last thing she wanted to do and I wondered if she had been told the truth about me.

"How have you been?" I didn't answer for I feared I would scream if I opened my mouth. "I think I'll take that as good." He chuckled and moved closer. I stepped back looking for an escape route. "I'm sure you know what we want." My eyes found his and I inhaled. "Well?" His hands reached out to me and I pressed myself against the brick wall. The back of the bar was a small enclosed space. Besides the door brick walls surrounded us and I found no way of getting out alive. I closed my eyes when his fingers found the collar of my shirt pulling me up to his face. He was taller than me and the toes of my boots were touching the ground as my face became level with his. "Answer me." Finally I opened my mouth and with a shaky voice replied.

"I remember what you want." He smirked and then began laughing.

"Do you really?" I nodded and he released me shoving me backwards. "Personally I don't think you remember anything at all, because if you did you'd remember Spot Conlon." I narrowed my eyes confused by his statement.

"What?"

"Oh I know about you and his relationship but I also know something you forget." I racked my brain for any relevance of Spot. The only things that came to mind were the night of the murder and the beating I received.

"I don't understand! Why is he being brought into this!?" my voice rose still shaking hoping that they wouldn't drag him into my past. I glanced at Pirate her head down her fingers tangled in her hair. "Pirate?" I asked noticing that she didn't look too well. Stepping forward Seth pushed me back and motioned for one of the men to take her away. I recognized Slims as he wrapped his arms around her waist and exited the brick cage. "What's wrong with her?" I inquired turning back to him. He shrugged and tried to redirect my attention.

"Who cares about her she's done her job now its time for you to give me what I want." His hands snatched my wrists in a sudden motion I wasn't prepared for. I gasped when he slammed them beside my head and I grimaced when I felt the pain of skin breaking. "Tell me where the money is Sherry." Seth's voice was quiet and deadly. My eyes searched his as I tried to remember that night. A few things appeared but other than that it was blank.

"I can't remember where it is..." I trailed off. Seth's jaw clenched and he let go of one of my wrists to punch me in the stomach. I groaned in pain as I fell to one knee wrapping my arms around myself.

"Don't lie to me!" he shrieked placing his boot on my shoulder and pushing me face down.

"I don't know Seth!" I yelled back feeling tears fall down my cheeks. "I don't know!"

"Shut up!" he kicked me in the ribs and I gasped. "I'll torture you until you do know and once you tell me I'll give you what you've always wanted."

Spot's POV

I noticed the sun was setting and I sighed impatiently. Vaudeville had told me that she would be back by now and there was no sign of her. I promised myself not to search for her so that I could continue to keep my image of being the tough leader everyone respected. Tapping my cane on the floor I was interrupted by Striker.

"Worried bout her?" he asked and I turned my eyes narrowed.

"No." I spat back grinding my teeth. Striker chuckled from behind me and I sent him off to do something else and leave me alone. It was aggravating for me to sit around and wait so I stood and finally decided to take a trip over towards Manhattan. If Vaudeville complained I had already thought up the perfect lie. Before I could even get out of the warehouse Racetrack was out of breath in front of me.

"Spot!" he gasped reaching up and holding onto my arm as he caught his breath.

"What? Where's Vaudeville?!" Immediately I was concerned and scanned the area for her.

"I don't know, next minute she was there and then she was gone." I pushed him off of me and ran towards Manhattan. "Spot!" I heard Racetrack screaming from behind me but I didn't stop. There were only so many places she could be and I had to find her before I lost her.

As I neared the Lodging house in Manhattan I screamed for Jack. When he emerged from the door so did Navy and I was relieved.

"Navy!" I called. He was in charge of Vaudeville's whereabouts and if no one knew where she was he would. "Where is she?" I asked when we had met up halfway down the sidewalk. He grabbed my arms before speaking as if to steady me.

"She's at the new bar, in the back."

"Is anyone with her?" he nodded solemnly and I gritted my teeth.

"A group of men." I turned and ran assuming Navy and Jack were behind me.

Vaudeville's POV

My right eye was swollen shut as I wiped blood away from my mouth. It didn't matter how much Seth beat me I wouldn't remember what he wanted me to.

"Seth, it's gonna take me time to remember." He rolled his eyes and spit next to me.

"I've given ya plenty of time." I sighed knowing that wasn't the first time I had heard that. "Time is up Sherry." By this time the sun was almost completely set and with the last fading light I saw the glint of something. Looking up Seth's arm was poised a knife in his hands.

"Wait..."

"Why?"

"I swear I'll tell you where the money is, I'll even give it to you if you just let me live and let Pirate go." He lowered the knife slightly.

"How do I know you won't run again?"

"You have my word." He shook his head.

"No, your word isn't enough."

"Seth!"

"I'll make you a deal. If you don't have the money in four weeks we'll kill Spot, Pirate, _and _that lovely family of yours in Queens." I bit my lip and nodded.

"Deal." I breathed. He reached down and grabbed my arm lifting me up.

"Meet me here exactly a month from now with everything I said or else. I won't be lenient on this deal Sherry." I nodded, "Believe me I'll even make you watch." He smiled pulling me closer once more our faces inches apart. "And while you're remembering where our money is why don't you try and remember Spot. I'm sure it'll be an awful awakening on your part." He kissed me and with more force than the rest he shoved me back to the ground. The door swung open and as I lifted myself up I saw Spot, Navy, Jack, Blink, Mush and a couple of other newsies rush in.

"Leave her alone!" Spot shouted pointing his cane at Seth. He smiled showing off his crooked yellow teeth.

"You can have 'er Mr. Spot Conlon." He glanced towards me and I felt sick as I turned away. "I'm done with her." The newsies were in fighting stances as Seth motioned for his boys to file out. Before the door shut Pirate stumbled outside and they were gone. Everyone was silent and Spot was at my side. I looked over at him and attempted to smile. He ran his hand along my face and I saw the rage in his blue eyes. I rested my hands on his arms and he pulled me up.

"Don't Spot." I mumbled leaning against him. "Stay with me." I wanted to make sure that he wouldn't leave me for revenge and he nodded curtly.

Pirate and I had been under house arrest since we had returned. Jack and Spot decided it was best to leave me in Manhattan with Pirate until I was completely healed. My face was better except for the fading green, purple, and black colors of my eye. Two broken ribs and a sprained wrist were added to my list of damage. Pirate was unharmed, but besides taking care of my injuries with Kloppman she didn't speak or look at me.

It was another typical day of silence in the lodging house. The newsies had already left and I was lying in bed. I wished that Pirate would get over whatever was keeping her from me because she was lying in the bed next to me and not talking. Sighing I shifted as much as I could and decided today was the day I would ask her what was wrong. I held nothing against her whatsoever for what happened. Seth and I had history and I knew what he was like.

"Vaudeville!" I rolled my eyes at the sound of Spot's voice. He visited me a thousand times a day to make sure if I was alright, along with lecturing me about the same thing over and over again.

"Yeah?!" I called back aggravated when he reached the bunkroom. I heard Pirate's bed creak and she was gone. Whenever Spot appeared she always left and I wondered if he had lectured her as well, for what I wasn't sure.

"How are ya feeling?"

"Good." I replied as he pulled up a chair.

"Are ya sure?"

"Yes." I snapped. He smirked and reached for my hand.

"You betta get well soon."

"Yeah, yeah."

"I mean it." He squeezed my hand and I couldn't help but smile.

"I know Spot jeez." Quickly he slid his hand away from mine and shoved it into his pocket.

"I gotta sell. See ya later." He stood and exited. I hated being bed ridden and I hoped my injuries would go away as soon as possible. As I sat in bed healing my time was ticking away to complete what Seth had told me a week ago. Three more weeks and I would have to come up with the money or Spot and everyone else I cared for would be dead. Seth was not one to mess with.

It was around lunch time when Pirate returned with a tray of food. She set it down on my bed and I thanked her. Plate in hand she went to leave but I stopped her.

"Pirate?" she froze and I continued not expecting a reply. "Why won't you speak to me?" The silence was becoming awkward and I shifted uneasily.

"Does it matter?" she whispered and I had to strain to hear her.

"Of course it matters you're my friend." Her plate fell to the ground and shattered. She turned to me tears streaming down her face. I was startled by her reaction and bit my lip.

"How can you say that?" she asked her hands curling into fists. "How can you still call me your friend I almost killed you!" she was screaming and I held up my hand.

"Pirate I don't blame you!" I shouted over her sobs. If I had known she was going to break down I would have held off my question.

"Blame me? I led you there, I knew what I was doing, I asked you to get rid of that girl and they found you, I disappeared and you almost froze to death outside looking for me. Yes I heard about that too! The first time I accidentally let you see me! Vaudeville you've been the only _true_ friend I've had since the newsies and I didn't want to betray you but he made me!" By that time her words had become incoherent. She was at my bed side crying and I hesitantly reached out resting my hand on her head.

"Pirate...I understand. I'd been with Seth for awhile before I found the newsies, before I found you and Spot. Now I know I'm not alone, I can face him because of you guys." She looked up her eyes red with a confused expression.

"You're not gonna see him again are ya?" she asked fear obvious in her voice. I smiled and lied shaking my head.

"No, but I was able to stand there because you guys were with me. And I hope you can still be my friend because I don't hold anything against you." She wrapped her arms gently around my stomach and rested her head on my shoulder. I hugged her back as she stopped crying. Kloppman entered the bunkroom and I knew he had waited for the right moment.

"Do ya need help cleaning this up?" he asked pointing to the mess on the floor. Pirate straightened and laughed wiping tears away.

"Sorry Klopp."

"I guess I forgive ya." He smiled and she left to get a broom. I looked over at him and nodded to signify that everything was okay. With a swift nod he exited and I exhaled. Returning to my lunch I ate it feeling that everything was slowly falling back into place. Now I had to focus and try to regain the suppressed memories of the past two years. Closing my eyes I drifted off into sleep praying that my injuries would heal, and heal fast for I had a plan.

It was the first day I had been out of bed and I was ecstatic. I woke up before the newsies and quickly washed up. Once I finished I changed into a fresh pair of clothes and checked myself in the mirror. There were no bags under my eyes and I looked well rested and completely rejuvenated. I heard Kloppman on the stairs and I dashed down to meet him halfway. He was startled when I jumped in front of him and for a moment I thought I had given him a heart attack.

"Vaudeville!" he exclaimed laughing. I grinned and he patted my shoulder. "Sometimes you remind me of my granddaughter." It seemed his eyes began to water and I forced a smile.

"Where is she?" I asked and he seemed reluctant to tell me.

"Some place else." Patting me again he brushed past me to wake the others and I continued down the steps. I pushed open the door and stepped outside into the warm air. The familiar noises of New York in the morning made me smile. When I was younger I had dreamt about the day I would leave and never come back and now I wasn't so sure that was what I wanted. Now that I had Spot in my life I considered sticking around after I gave Seth what he wanted.

"I see you're up and around now." Pirate said coming to stand next to me.

"Yeah, I'm glad I can finally get out of bed."

"Then we should celebrate!" I laughed and nodded.

"That sounds nice but I have to talk to Spot first." Pirate's face split into a grin and I looked at her bewildered by her reaction.

"I forgot about you and Spotsy." She started to chuckle demonically. "So are you guys serious?"

"Define serious."

"I think you know what I mean." I blushed and shook my head. "Anyway I bet he wants to spend time with you after having to live without you for so long." I shrugged still slightly embarrassed by Pirate's insinuation. She was all smiles as Spot appeared and I felt it was a little too coincidental. He smirked when he saw me standing.

"Glad to see you're better." He said turning to Pirate and nodding curtly. She snickered and started to walk away.

"Have fun with her Spot!" she called and before I could say anything dashed around the corner.

"What is she talking about?" he asked sounding aggravated.

"Nothing." When she was gone he hugged me close. He was gentle clearly afraid he might hurt me. As he pulled away he kissed me and I hugged him tightly. I hadn't realized how much I missed him while I was here. "So are we selling here today?" he shook his head and took my hand. I was surprised by how affectionate he was being but was careful not to say anything; it wasn't as if it bothered me. "Brooklyn then?"

"I'm not in the mood to sell."

"Really?" It was unusual for Spot not to at least sell a little during the day and I hoped nothing awful had happened while I was away.

"I thought we might just ya know." He trailed off.

"Yeah that sounds nice." I said understanding what he was trying to say and glanced towards him from the corner of my eye and he was smiling. I bit my lip to suppress the urge to tackle him right then and there. Spot Conlon scarcely smiled he only smirked.

Spot and I had spent the day walking around Manhattan, avoiding Bottle Alley of course, enjoying how nice the weather had gotten. It felt as if we both were carefree like most of the wealthier people and I enjoyed it. When the sun had set he directed me towards the dock area of Manhattan. I had only been around there once and it was to dispose of the girl Pirate had murdered. There was the sound of music and he pushed me into a dark building. At first I was afraid that he had decided to dump me somewhere but then I realized it was a restaurant. An old man wobbled over to us smiling from ear to ear.

"Well if it isn't Master Conlon." He wheezed. Spot nodded and reached over to shake hands with the man. I took the time that they talked to observe the small place. There weren't a lot of people but enough to use the word crowded. They were mostly people of the poorer class but seemed happy all the same. The tables and chairs were nice and a small deck extended away from the building over the water. I thought it was beautiful.

"This is Sherry." I was surprised to hear my real name and turned back to the man. I smiled and he held out his hand. Resting my hand in his he pulled it towards his lips and kissed it.

"Nice to meet you Madam." I nodded and Spot seemed amused by my expression. "She's beautiful Master Conlon; I would definitely keep her if I were still young." His laugh shook his frail body and he motioned towards an empty table. My face flushed and Spot chuckled. When we were seated and the man left I turned to Spot my eyes wide.

"Who was that?" he smiled and unrolled his silver ware.

"Ippolito."

"Who?"

"I've known him foreva, his name is Dante Ippolito, but I just call him Ippolito."

"I see. What was all that Master and Madam stuff?" Spot laughed and shrugged.

"He's just polite don't over analyze it."

"I'm not!"

"Sure, sure." He ignored my comeback and scanned the small menu that I hadn't noticed were left on the table. Slowly I picked it up and looked over the contents. Nothing jumped out at me so I set it down telling Spot I was having what he was. "I take you to a nice restaurant and you want what _I'm_ having?" he mocked aggravation and I nodded.

"You know I'm awful at decisions."

"Mm I guess that's true I mean I'm not the best decision to make." I turned towards him and narrowed my eyes.

"Don't be so egotistical."

"Hey, when you're Brooklyn you're automatically egotistical its part of the job description." I yawned and pretended to ignore him. He continued talking about his 'job' as a Brooklyn leader and I tuned him out. There were always pros and cons about every relationship. "Are you listenin'?"

"What?" I asked realizing I had zoned out. Spot sighed and I laughed. "Sorry, what were you saying?"

"Nothing. I ordered by the way."

"Dinner was great!" I enthused on our way back to home. It had turned out to be a wonderful night and I closed my eyes. My head was tilted up towards the stars and I heard Spot snicker. "What?" I snapped continuing to keep my eyes closed.

"You look ill." I smiled.

"Well I'm not."

"I'm not saying you are I'm saying you look it."

"Spot why are you so critical?" I opened my eyes and turned to him. He was staring at me blankly and we both stopped walking. His eyes shifted from me to the scenery. We had crossed the bridge and were only a few minutes away from the warehouse. After a few moments of an awkward silence he began walking again and I followed.

Spot still hadn't said a word when I entered my bedroom. I couldn't fathom why my question had gotten that particular reaction out of him but I tried to brush it off. There was no use worrying about something that I didn't understand. Alice had told me once that it was best to worry about something you had a solution to and not something you didn't. I smiled at the memory of my older sister and plopped down on my bed. As I laid down to go to sleep I heard my door open and close. At first I wasn't sure if it had happened or if I was dreaming, but when I turned to look I felt myself brush against something. I inhaled sharply about to scream when a hand clamped over my mouth.

"Shh, it's just me." The tension I had felt earlier melted and Spot removed his hand. "I don't know why you're still so jumpy." He mumbled pushing the blankets back so he could slip in.

"At least I don't have mood swings anymore."

"Thank god for that." I rolled my eyes and tried to give him some room but he wrapped his arms around me and pulled me closer. My breath caught in my throat and I felt the heat rise in my face.

"Spot." I muttered.

"Don't ruin the moment." He whispered in my ear and I felt goose bumps. My heart raced and I hoped he couldn't hear it because it sounded awfully loud to me. Gently he kissed me and I was positive my heart was going to pound out of my chest. Only after a few more kisses did I finally relax.

"What brought this on?" I asked after we had broken apart. He smiled and kissed me again.

"Does it matter?" I shook my head and we continued. I realized just how much I cared for Spot that night.

**A/n: Hey guys. So this was another 7 page update! Whoo! There was action in the beginning, but after that and Pirate's break down I attempted to make it more happy and show the 'connection' between Spot and Vaudeville more. So you guys know the drill, review review review. Hope ya'll enjoyed this chapter! **


	15. You won't know

Chapter fifteen- You won't know

Navy's POV

I walked briskly towards Seth's apartment. It was a few days after the incident with Vaudeville at the new bar. I hadn't told any of them that now was the time to start a full on attack.

"Navy!" Seth called when I had come into view. I sighed as I stopped in front of him. He was outside of his building drinking, like usual, with his employees around. "Some show huh?" I knew what he was referring to and shook my head.

"We weren't ready yet." Seth shrugged and chugged the alcohol before throwing it away from him. He turned to me and I kept my face expressionless.

"I know when we're ready."

"Then why ask for my help?"

"You _asked_ for a chance to bring down Spot, and I'm giving it to you be grateful."

"Grateful? Well we haven't killed him yet have we?!"

"Sherry first, then Spot!" I narrowed my eyes and Seth did the same. We mirrored each other until Slims cut in.

"Hey listen, ya know that Spot an' Sherry are together, if you want to hurt Spot hurt her." I turned to Slims letting his statement sink in. Everyone knew about Spot and Vaudeville but I only thought it was a fling. I had never known Spot to have any type of long standing relationship he always seemed to be a one night stand. The thought of them being serious hadn't crossed my mind until now. Seth chuckled and ordered one of his men for more whiskey. He took a sip before turning to me smiling.

"See, it all works out. Now hold ya horses okay? Sherry and I worked out a little deal." I listened as he explained and decided that I could wait just a little longer. Spot had taken someone from me and now I would take someone from him, and enjoy doing it.

Vaudeville's POV

Pirate and I were eating well today. Since summer was coming fast the usual few people had turned into crowds. We smiled at each other as we gulped down our second sandwich.

"I can't believe today was so good!" she exclaimed and I nodded enthusiastically. "I've never sold out of newspapers before, especially in such short time."

"I think I've made enough to finally pay Spot back for all the weeks I haven't worked." Pirate smirked and took a sip of her water.

"You're not the only one owin' a debt." She had informed me that she intended on working hard to pay back the newsies for the food and care they had supplied for her when she had returned.

"I guess we're in the same boat." We smiled at each other and paid for lunch before exiting the restaurant. The encounter with Seth had brought both of us back to reality with full force and through that we had grown closer as friends.

"So should we continue to sell or go have a girl's day off?" she inquired and I glanced around. We had sold a lot of papers and I couldn't imagine why anyone could complain, Pirate and I were our own people.

"Um, if tomorrow is as good as today can we try then?" she stared at me obviously confused and I looked away. "I have something I need to do today so I'll talk to you later; Spot said something was going on in Queens anyway." Pirate nodded.

"Yeah that's true I guess I'll see ya then." I knew she felt rejected but I ignored it and continued on my way. In the end I was doing her a favor by saving her life.

I scanned constantly as I walked to make sure Spot was nowhere in sight. The last person who needed to be following me would be him. Pirate had told me that Spot made Navy keep dibs on me and that was annoying. It felt as if he didn't trust me enough, but he was only being extremely careful and over protective. As I turned right into the vaguely familiar area I strained to remember anything. Since I was younger I was always the type to repress and at this moment I wish I hadn't.

The farther you ventured into Manhattan the more homes of the rich would begin to appear. Mostly the wealthy enjoyed being far from the action of the streets and alleys of the poor. Seth always kept men around this area to keep watch for any jobs that they could surely pull off. His gang was mainly made up of thieves and it was the only way they learned how to survive. In their minds they were justifying their actions but I saw it for what it really was, **wrong**. That one fact alone made me different from all of them and also gave me fresh black eyes. As I crossed onto Stewart Avenue the house I would never forget came into view. It was the same it had been two years ago. The only thing I knew had changed was who was living there. I wasn't positive if any new owners had taken over the property but I doubted it. Seth had given me the money and the papers to claim the estate. I stopped in front of the steps and lifted my head so I could study the outside. The windows were clear and the sunlight reflected off of them. The walls were brick and the two front doors had been painted blue. I closed my eyes and opened the door to my past.

_"Keep up Sherry!" Seth yelled. She was lagging behind the group that was hastily moving along the dimly lit streets. Tonight was the date of Seth's premeditated robbery. It had been Sherry's fault that this particular family had been chosen. If Seth felt 'charitable' he would keep them alive only to find that their things would be missing. Two years ago Sherry had been allowed out of the apartment and was given an escort to Central Park for air. Seth had kept her inside for almost a month, except for errands, and he reluctantly agreed, with the help of her only friend Tommy, to let her off punishment. What she had been punished for she wasn't sure but she enjoyed being alone in the apartment than with any of his men. Tommy usually joined her and she constantly wondered why he had involved himself with Seth's people. Once they had reached their destination she had accidentally run into a boy about her age, possibly a year older. He seemed very polite when he apologized for not paying attention. Somehow they had began a conversation and without thinking she had told him a little too much about her life. Without warning Seth had appeared and grabbed her arm yanking her away and pushing the boy back. Quickly he left and they had watched him until he disappeared around the corner with his family. After he was gone Seth told Tommy that he wasn't doing his job correctly. Tommy took the lecture well but to be on better terms with Seth he pointed out that the boy's father was a very wealthy and powerful man. Now they were stalking along the sidewalk protected by shadows towards this man's home. Sherry felt guilty and when she had expressed her feelings to Tommy Seth over heard and forced her to be part of their job. _

_It had been a spur of the moment decision to rob this particular family. Seth had been failing on jobs for the past couple of years and randomly Sherry had noticed the man walking when she was with Seth, and subconsciously pointed out that it was the powerful man Tommy had informed him about. The moment the words had escaped from her mouth Seth set his plan in motion to rob him, a job he should have done the two years ago they had encountered his son. _

_Seth held out his arm and the group stopped a few feet away from the home. He motioned for Slims to go in first to make sure the coast was clear. A few seconds later they received the signal and each one forced their way into the home as quietly as possible. "Sherry keep watch." Seth demanded as he crept up the stairs with Tommy and Benson. Quietly she stood next to the large window in the dining room. She moved aside the floral curtains and checked the streets for any police or bystanders. Inside she prayed that someone would notice something wasn't right and get help. Suddenly there was a loud noise and Sherry turned to see the silhouettes of more than three people. "Light the lamps!" Seth screamed and Sherry knew he was talking to her. She dashed and lit all the lamps she could find and returned to her post. By this time Seth had what she assumed to be the father, mother, and their daughter on their knees facing the front doors. She scanned their pale, fearful faces to find that the boy was not there. A sense of relief rushed over her as she was thankful he would be spared from this awful crime. _

I heard the front door slam and my eyes shot open. It hadn't been the house I was standing in front of instead it had been across the street. I sighed with relief and decided that I would move away so I wouldn't look suspicious. As I began walking back the way I came I heard an all too familiar voice. My instincts told me to hide and I did jumping behind a small opening between two buildings. I waited until Spot had passed my hiding place and well enough away from where I was so I wouldn't be seen before I moved. Curiosity overwhelmed me as I racked my brain for any reason that he would be over here. I knew I wouldn't ask so instead I came up with my own excuse and made my way to the warehouse. The sun was setting and I hadn't realized that I had been standing there for so long. Inside my mind my memories were much shorter and sometimes going much to fast for me to make any sense of the jumbled images. I swallowed to wet my dry mouth and felt warm tears fall down my face. If I had let myself remember anymore than I surely would have gotten to the gory picture I knew was still in my memory. Today was too soon for me to remember that but too late in another sense. I didn't have much time until I had to meet Seth with the money in order to save the lives of the people I loved.

Spot was waiting for me outside the warehouse and I smiled when I saw him. He returned the smile and glanced around before hugging me. It was a tight hug but gentle. When he pulled away he kissed me quickly and we began the walk to Queens. I stuffed my hands in my pockets and stared at the sky's orange and red glow. For the first time in awhile I wondered if Sky had found his parents and if I would ever see him again.

"How was your day?" I asked Spot after we had been walking for awhile. He shrugged and I hoped he was in a good mood.

There was a hall in Queens know as Sheldon. It was nothing like Irving Hall in Manhattan. Sheldon was similar to a bar with a much larger space that usually contained young men and numerous newsies who gathered there. I felt Spot rest his hand on my shoulder when we entered the building. The Manhattan newsies were already there and I picked Pirate out of the crowd. Turning to Spot he let go of me and I waved as I sought her out. She saw me before I reached her and she elbowed her way towards me.

"A lot of people huh?" she asked practically having to scream over the large amounts of newsboys. I nodded and she laughed taking my arm and leading me to a staircase. We climbed the steps until we reached the middle and sat down.

"How come they're all crowded down there?"

"They haven't opened the doors that lead into the much larger hall."

"Have you ever been here before?"

"Oh yes. The Queens newsies hold this event almost every year; we all look forward to it." I smiled and assumed the crowd had been let in when the noise disappeared and music began to play.

"And I thought only Medda held parties." Pirate shook her head and stood straightening out her pants and shirt. "So is it only for newsies?" I inquired following her lead.

"No anyone is invited actually we have a lot of boys and girls join in." She stuffed her hat in the back pocket of her pants. My hat had already been removed and I placed my long hair up into a bun. "Last year Spot danced with quite a few girls." I laughed and couldn't imagine that as we entered the large room. Multiple newsies were up and dancing already and I saw Spot standing by the bar.

"I hope he's not drinking." I commented watching him as he spoke to the bartender. Pirate nudged me and led me towards an empty table.

"Let 'em drink Vaude!" we sat down and she waved the normal crew over. "This is a celebration anyways." I sighed and rested my chin on the palm of my hand. As the seats around us began to fill I turned back to Spot. He had left the bar and when I began to search for him Race called my name.

"Vaudeville." I glanced at him.

"Yes?"

"Can you go tell the bartender that we need some drinks over here pronto?" I sighed and nodded pushing my chair back as I made my way over to the bar. On my way I didn't see Spot and wondered where he could possibly had wandered of too. The image of him dancing with another girl made my eyes narrow and I felt one my few waves of jealousy.

"Excuse me!" I called behind the bar looking for the man I had seen earlier. As I waited I turned and looked once more before the bartender called my attention back.

"Can I help you?" When I turned to face him my face fell and my eyes widened. Coincidentally someone I hadn't seen in half a year that I was sure was dead was standing in front of me holding a glass. He recognized me immediately too and his face split into a large grin. "Sherry!" he exclaimed setting the glass down.

"Wow, Tommy." I replied quite not so enthusiastically.

"How are you?" he inquired ignoring his other costumers' yells for service.

"I'm pretty good, how are you?" he shrugged still grinning.

"I could be better but can't everyone?"

"I suppose." He shook his head and sighed.

"This is amazing that I would run into you here of all places." I nodded and he asked me to wait for a minute as he asked another young man to step in for him. A few seconds later he was at my side and asking if I would like to take a walk. Agreeing we left the room and stepped outside. "So are you still with Seth?" I hated how he made it sound as if we were a couple. I shook my head and looked him over. He still had the same curly red hair and brown eyes. Over the years he became much better looking and I wondered if he was glad for that. "That's good," he paused as he looked at the sky, "You deserve better than that life Sher, much better." I smiled.

"What about you Tommy? You must have a wife somewhere waiting up for you right?" he laughed and shook his head. I forgot how much I had enjoyed his laugh.

"No not me I've continued to be alone all this time, but ya know I'm still pretty young."

"Yeah but aren't you lonely?"

"No. I actually have a dog, and she always keeps me company."

"That sounds like you." I chuckled as I remembered his compassion for animals. "Did you rescue her?" he nodded and seemed as if he was remembering that time.

"You could say she's the wife waiting up for me."

"What's her name?"

"Lily." He described his dog to me and said that sometime I should come and visit him. "I know Lily would enjoy company." I laughed.

"Stop, you're making her really sound like your wife." He smiled and we stopped walking noticing that we had gone farther than we should have. We fell into silence as he stared at me thoughtfully.

"Sherry?"

"Tommy?"

"May I ask you a personal question?"

"Sure." I replied hesitantly.

"How did you get away from Seth?" I looked at my feet before answering. I wasn't sure if I could really tell Tommy everything but I had no reason not to trust him. Through the years that we had spent together he had never betrayed my trust.

"I took the money remember?" he nodded waiting for me to continue. "His men beat me and left me to die." I hadn't lifted my head and heard him inhale sharply. "Someone saved me and now I'm living as a newsie to make money."

"You? A newsie?" I nodded and he started to laugh. The tense moment we had lessened and I glanced up at him smiling a little.

"What's funny about that?"

"Everything." When he had stopped I decided I would ask him a personal question.

"Tommy how did you get out of prison?" he looked a little taken back but then smiled. He had always been an easy going person and I loved that quality about him.

"Actually a maid witnessed our crime and she saved me." I was surprised that someone had been there since I hadn't remembered seeing anyone else.

"Really?" he noticed my tone and expression and nodded.

"I had the same reaction. I hadn't seen anyone upstairs." I felt fear wondering if I would run into her next and she would tell the police everything. "Don't worry she left after she got me out." I sighed.

"Am I that easy to read?"

"I've known you for awhile ya know." I nodded and he continued with his story. He had moved to Queens once he had gotten out and made sure that he kept himself out of crime. Since then he rescued Lily from the harsh winters of New York and lived in a small apartment not far from the hall.

"So you're a bartender?"

"Yes ma'am. I actually want to open up my own bar to make money, but I'm not sure if my finances can handle that."

"I'm sure you'll do it some day." I rested my hand on his arm when we stopped in front of the hall. He smiled at me and I knew he understood we were saying goodbye. "Promise me that you'll find a wife, and I don't mean Lily."

"She'll be jealous if another woman entered my life."

"If she loves you I know she'll understand." I couldn't picture Tommy's life as empty as it would be if he only kept animals for company. He was the type of guy you wanted to see with a wife and kids and die not alone but with someone. In a way Tommy and I were the same for we both had done things we weren't proud of but now we were correcting them.

"Vaudeville?" I jumped at the sound of Spot's voice and turned. He was standing a few feet away from me his arms crossed. "Who's this?" his eyes were focused on Tommy but he seemed calm.

"This is-"

"No one." I glanced at Tommy startled by his reply. It seemed rushed and surprised, and his face said the same thing. Spot raised his chin slightly and I looked at Tommy confused. "I just wanted to know if she had a cigarette, that's all."

"That's-"he cut me off by holding his hand up slightly.

"Really?"

"Yeah, but why is that important?" Spot stepped next to me and took on his macho role.

"Because it is." Tommy seemed to understand and turned to me his eyes gentle.

"Thank you. Have a good life." I nodded and he disappeared. I knew that when Tommy was gone he wasn't coming back and I felt sick. I wasn't sure if it was because I was sad that he had come into my life in a split second and in that same interval disappeared never to return.

"Are you okay?" Spot asked and I nodded.

"Spot I don't want to go back in there." I gestured towards the hall and he nodded.

"Alright let's go home then."

"No I don't want to go home either."

"Then where do you wanna go?" I looked at him and smiled a little remembering that we were in Queens.

"Do you wanna meet my family?"

**A/n: I had next to no time to finish editing this. Sorry if you find mistakes or sentences do not make sense. I'm a big editor so I always continue to edit the things I write. Sorry its taken me forever to update, I've had to take my driving test and I've missed classes for it so I'm trying to make up loads of work. REVIEW PLEASE!! thanks for those who do. **


	16. Welcome to the Good Life

Chapter sixteen- Welcome to the Good Life

I felt slightly nervous that Spot was about to see a different side to me. Alice, Charlie, and Benjamin were people of my other self, my alter ego. They brought out the good deep inside my heart and made me vulnerable. It was strange to know that Spot was about to witness that very thing. If I explained the circumstances to Alice and told her everything about Spot and my relationship then she would tell me that he had already seen me vulnerable and to forget about it. I sighed calming myself down deciding to listen to the voice of reason that I usually disregarded.

We came upon the front door and I entered. Spot followed closely behind and I knocked when we reached apartment 102. I could hear my sister yelling inside and I smiled. As I extended my hand to knock once more Ben had swung the door open. His eyes widened at the sight of me and he flashed his usual grin. I returned the smile and his gaze flickered to Spot who was standing awkwardly next to me.

"Ben who is it?!" Alice called.

"Sherry Mama, and um...some man!" he replied and I chuckled turning to Spot who wore a blank expression. When I had asked him if he wanted to meet my family he had hesitantly responded. Now I hoped he wouldn't feel odd but I knew he most likely would. The King of Brooklyn as they called him was possibly the last person you brought home to your parents. Alice stampeded out of the kitchen, her typical place, her arms outstretched and face lit up.

"Sherry!" she exclaimed and crushed me as she pulled me into her. It had been awhile since they'd seen me but not too long. I pulled away and took a deep breath after the feeling that I was being suffocated.

"Alice, you saw me not too long ago do you really have to go crazy?"

"I thought you weren't coming back! Of course I have to go crazy." Her hands were on her hips now and she seemed offended that I didn't like her enthusiasm. Ben rolled his eyes.

"Don't feel bad Aunt Sherry she acts like that whenever I get home from school too."

"Benjamin Edward McLaughlin!" I laughed and when Alice had finished hitting the back of Ben's head she turned to Spot. "And who might you be?" her cheeriness had returned and I studied Spot's reactions carefully.

"Spot Conlon." She glanced towards me and I noticed her confused look.

"Well nice to meet you Spot." He nodded. "Now where are my manners?!" she cried when she saw that we were still standing in the doorway. "Come inside and make yourselves at home." She motioned for me to follow her into the kitchen and I turned to Spot.

"Will you be okay with Ben? I have to go speak with Alice for a minute." He glanced at my nephew who was wearing a large smile.

"Yeah I'm fine." I felt as if he was annoyed but I ignored the feeling and left. Alice was leaning against the counter a mug of tea in her left hand.

"Spot Conlon?" she questioned taking a sip of her drink. I nodded and went to stand next to her. "Is that his real name?"

"No. I'm not sure what his real name is to be honest."

"Newsie?"

"Obviously."

"Do you have an odd name too?"

"Yes."

"What is it?" I hesitated before telling her. She stared at me blankly before laughing. "What is the significance of these names?" I felt offended as she continued to laugh. Usually my sister was understanding and accepting and now she was laughing at the life that I had chosen for myself.

"If you think it's so funny then I should just go." Abruptly she stopped and set down her cup.

"Oh Sherry I didn't mean to offend you honestly!" I could tell she was sincere and I sighed pushing away my feelings. She reached for me and I gave her a hug. "I'm sorry." I felt like I was her second child and she had wrongly punished me. I pulled away and nodded.

"It's fine."

"Anyway he's a very handsome boy." I smirked and she reached into the cupboard for plates and cups. "Does he like brownies?" I shrugged realizing that I had only rarely seen Spot anything beside sandwiches and such.

"Spot!" I called and a few moments later he entered the kitchen. Ben was close at his heels and I hoped they were getting along. "Do you like brownies?"

"Uh yeah." He replied and I couldn't help but smile. His reactions and responses were nothing but adorable and I threw my arms around his neck. At first he was startled by my sudden affection and hesitantly wrapped his arms around my waist. I heard Ben make an odd noise and Alice squeal. I finally let Spot go and his face was now red. Challenging that it was I suppressed myself from saying, 'aw' that he was blushing and turned back to Alice.

"Brownies it is then." She nodded and for the rest of the time that we were in the kitchen Spot stayed with me. "Where's Charlie?" I inquired when Alice began placing the freshly made tea and coffee, along with the brownies on the table.

"He should be here any second. He went out to mail a telegram." As if he had been telepathically called he appeared in the dining room and smiled at the sight of me.

"Sherry!" he called setting the things he had in his hands down and moving towards me. In one swift motion he was hugging me and I wondered what Spot thought of all this hugging and yelling. "Glad you came to visit sooner than usual." He turned to Spot and extended his hand. "Charlie McLaughlin." Spot shook his hand.

"Spot Conlon."

"Spot?" I sighed knowing that Charlie would ask questions. "Is that your god given name?" Spot smirked and I bit my lip hoping he wasn't offended.

"No."

"Then what is?" he glanced towards me and then back to Charlie.

"Ian, Ian Conlon." Charlie beamed and shook hands with him once more.

"Much better, nice to meet you Ian." Alice removed her apron and asked everyone to sit down. Spot sat next to me, Ben next to him and Alice near Charlie who was at the head of the table. I liked Spot's real name and briefly wondered if he would kill me if I began calling him that. "So Ian are you and Sherry together?" Charlie asked and I felt myself turn red. Spot did his best at hiding his emotions and cleared his throat.

"Yes we are." I thought that he would deny it but I felt happy that he hadn't.

"How did you meet?"

"Charlie can you nix the questions?" I interrupted not wanting to put Spot, well on the spot. He looked at me and smiled laughing as he drank his coffee.

"I agree dear the poor boy probably feels interrogated." Spot said nothing as he took a bite of his brownie. "Is it good?" Alice asked and he nodded.

"So you never answered my question." Charlie said again.

"Charlie!" Alice yelled and I sighed loudly. Spot began to laugh, actually laugh. I jumped when I heard the sound and watched him. Charlie was smiling and Ben was also laughing behind his hand.

"Vau- I mean Sherry is my newsie in Brooklyn. Basically we met that way." I rested my hand on his arm and he turned to me. I smiled and he did as well as I silently thanked him for not telling them about the alley.

"So you sell the newspaper?" Alice was the one to ask questions now and I knew soon Ben would jump in.

"I do." Spot's mood seemed to lighten and he was less tense. The questions continued and Spot calmly replied to each one. Once everyone was done with their brownies and drinks we stood from the table.

"Well it's time for Ben to go to bed." Alice said placing her arm around his shoulders. Ben made an unpleasant expression and I smiled.

"Alright give me a hug!" I said opening my arms. Ben meandered his way towards me and I hugged him close.

"Are you gonna come back soon again? Like this time?" he asked and I nodded.

"Sure I will."

"Are you gonna bring Spot too?" I turned to him and he smirked.

"I can't speak for him Ben, why don't you ask." He pulled away from me and glanced towards him.

"Are ya?"

"Wherever Sherry goes I go." Our eyes met and I felt something strange inside of me. It was a feeling as if this was the last time Spot and I would have such a peaceful moment, the last time Spot and I would be here. Finally I broke away and kissed Ben's cheek. Alice told him to go and get ready first while she said goodbye.

"Normally I would tell you to be careful on your way home, but Ian seems to be strong enough to protect you." I laughed as Alice gave me a hug and a quick kiss. "Come again soon, and of course you're welcome too Ian." She smiled warmly and disappeared down the hall. Charlie was standing with his hands on his brown suspenders smiling. He shook Spot's hand and gave me a kiss.

"I don't have to tell you to come again soon 'cause you already know I want you too. It was great meeting you Ian. Take good care of Sherry for us." I felt as if they were all giving me away to be married, minus Ben of course. I nodded and Spot and I exited the apartment. When we had reached the street Spot began laughing.

"The last time anyone ever called me Ian was before I became a newsie." I nodded.

"That's my sister and brother in law for ya." We were quiet as we made our way back to Brooklyn. "Did you enjoy yourself?" It took him a few moments to respond and he shrugged.

"Surprisingly I did."

"You seemed annoyed."

"At first." I didn't press the issue further. "I was curious about one thing though."

"What's that?"

"Why aren't ya livin' with them?" I stopped moving and Spot did the same. We were staring intently at each other. I bit my lip at the swarm of emotions I felt inside myself at that moment. It was similar to what I felt inside my sister's lively home and I wanted to turn and run.

"It's complicated." I finally responded my voice shaky. Spot seemed to notice that I was on the verge of a breakdown but continued to question me.

"How can it be complicated, they're your family."

"Spot."

"Vaudeville." I felt relieved that we had returned to our street names not sure if I could handle him calling me Sherry. There was some type of intimacy in using our real names. It could have been the fact that they tied us to a life that both of us left behind. A life that could break us at any moment, and no amount of fronting that Spot could do would make me think that he wasn't also standing on the edge of his own personal cliff. "You can tell me." He reached for me but I stepped backwards.

"I don't like it."

"Don't like what?"

"I don't like how I feel when I'm there. Of course I feel happy, and I love them, but I can't take their smiles...or their laughter as if nothing could touch them as if they're happiness is indestructible." I paused and waited for Spot to smirk, laugh, or say I sounded stupid but he didn't and I continued. "I believe my sister doesn't think that but it's what I feel. When I watch them I want to leave. I don't deserve something like that, I don't deserve them." I was done and I closed my eyes while I took deep breaths. I felt two arms encircle me and I rested my head against his shoulder.

"I know that feeling real well." Spot whispered to me. We pulled away and continued home.

"Today wasn't as good as last week." Pirate groaned as she plopped down on a bench in Central Park. I sighed and sat next to her holding my stomach. "What's the matter?" she inquired when I bent down so my head was almost between my knees.

"I don't feel well." I mumbled as I tasted something disgusting in my mouth.

"Oh jeez." She replied beginning to rub my back. "This has become a normal routine for ya every morning."

"I know."

"Maybe you should start to sell in the afternoon?" I shook my head and bolted upright. Dashing behind a tree I emptied the contents of my stomach. "Are you alright?" Pirate called still seated on the bench. I wiped my mouth and waved my hand towards her. When I had returned she suggested getting something to drink at Tibby's. I agreed and we began the walk there. "Do you feel sick?"

"You ask me this every time Pirate and I always give you the same answer, no." she was silent as we entered the restaurant and asked for a glass of water. After I finished it off we exited since water was free and made our way back to our selling area.

"Have you ever considered that ya might be...pregnant?" my heart raced and my stomach flipped at the thought that I could be carrying a child. It wasn't impossible and I shrugged that likelihood off. Pirate noticed my uncertainty when I said I didn't think so. "So you and Spotty have gotten serious huh?" I blushed and changed the subject deciding that was the last thing I wanted to discuss. Thankfully she went along and we finished selling. By the time we had returned to the Manhattan lodging house I had thrown up a couple more times. Pirate flashed me a worried look but I shrugged it off and we stepped inside. The newsboys were sitting around laughing and Race jumped up when he saw me.

"Hey Vaude something came for ya today." He passed me an envelope and I thanked him as I tore it open. Pirate had left my side and disappeared upstairs when I pulled the small piece of paper out. I gasped loudly when I read the words that were scribbled hastily. "What is it?" Race asked watching me. I shook my head and crumpled the paper up.

"Nothing." I replied attempting to make it seem so and dashed upstairs before anymore questions could be asked. Pirate was sitting on Snipeshooters's bed brushing her hair when I entered the bunk room. There was a red dress lying next to her and I narrowed my eyes momentarily forgetting the letter I had received. "What's all this?" I asked sitting on the bunk bed across from her. She jumped at the sound of my voice and then laughed nervously.

"I forgot to tell you I guess." She replied setting her brush down.

"Tell me what?"

"I met someone."

"Who?!" I exclaimed curious as to when she had.

"You wouldn't know him."

"When?!"

"This may sound odd, but during the time I spent with Seth." Immediately my curiosity spiked. She noticed my expression and hurried on. "I was out one day running an errand for him when I tripped. This man caught me and I thanked him realizing that he obviously wasn't from New York. He explained that he was visiting and asked me for directions. Since then I usually snuck out and met him places."

"Good for you!" I practically yelled and she motioned for me to be quiet.

"Thanks, but the guys don't know so don't make a big deal outta it."

"Well at least you haven't murdered anyone." She made a face but surprisingly enough she didn't act offended. "What's his name?"

"Ethan Johnson."

"I'm gonna have to meet him now." She laughed and stood picking up her dress.

"I don't know about that." She said to me as she changed in one of the bathroom stalls.

"Pirate!"

"Of course you can." When she emerged my mouth nearly fell open. This was the first time I had ever seen her look like a woman for lack of a better way to say it. The dress almost clung to her and her black hair went along perfectly with the colors. "Vaude I'm in love with him. Seriously." I nodded. "So here's the issue, I wanna quit being a newsie." It took a few moments for it to sink in.

"What!"

"I'm leaving with him Vaude I don't want to live this life anymore."

"No you can't!" she smiled weakly and began pulling on her regular clothing as to hide the dress. "Pirate just stay with me a little longer okay? I lost Sky and I don't want you to go yet."

"I'll talk to Ethan about it."

"You're gonna have to tell the newsies." She nodded and placed her hands on my shoulders.

"When the time comes I will, but for now I gotta date." I watched as she went downstairs and barely heard her excuse. Slowly I stood and found Spot waiting for me near the front door.

"Ready?" he asked and I nodded. Waving my goodbye I exited the lodging house and the letter I had received flooded back to me.

_Have ya found the money yet Sherry? _

_Seth_

**A/n: Alright I did not edit this chapter. Sorry. I have been in a hurry to update for ya'll. First I was suppper excited that they're making a movie for Twilight!! then afterwards I went to New York City for the first time in my whoollee life to see RENT on broadway and it was amazing!! so now i'm back and fully commited to finishing this story. REVIEW please.**


	17. Artist Artists

Chapter Seventeen- Artists Artists.

Pirate and I were sitting in a large office on the ritzy side of town. Today was Saturday and for some odd reason Jack and Spot had both agreed that we shouldn't sell and should take the day off. At that declaration Pirate decided that I would be able to meet Ethan at last. They had gotten rather serious since I had heard of him. Yesterday Pirate and I had stolen a suitcase from an unknown store manager and now she was packing her belongings inside anxious for the day she would depart from New York.

"So what's he doing here?"

"He's getting his things of course."

"Things?"

"Well his Aunt died. That's the reason he's here in the foist place, and she left him things in her will." I shifted uneasily in my seat. Offices always made me anxious and I hoped he would come out soon. Sure enough a few minutes later he emerged from a hallway and smiled when he saw Pirate. Before we had left she changed her clothing once again to look feminine. I decided I would stay in what I normally wore. She protested at first but when I refused to change she gave in. "Ethan this is my good friend Sherry."

"Very nice to meet you Sherry." He held out his hand and I shook it. "Emma has told me so much about you!" My eyes flickered towards Pirate and I smiled.

"Oh yes she's told me a lot about you too Mr. Johnson."

"So do you know that we're leaving here soon?"

"Yes she informed me a couple days ago, where are you going?"

"California." My eyes grew wide and I thought Pirate looked sad for a moment.

"That's far out there." I commented sighing as I thought of Pirate leaving.

"Yes it is, but I have a ranch out there." After a few more minutes of discussion we decided to leave and go out to lunch. As we walked I realized that Pirate and Ethan looked perfect together. He was a few inches taller than her and had short brown hair. Each time he looked at Pirate his green eyes sparkled and I could see the affection he held for her. Ethan picked a very nice restaurant so I assumed he had money. We were seated and I sat across from the two.

"So what did your aunt leave you?"

"A large amount of money." He paused as we ordered our drinks and he continued. "So now I can buy our tickets for the train out west." They smiled at each other and when Pirate glanced at me I faked a grin.

"Sounds like you have it all planned out."

"As much as we can plan out yes." Pirate had changed the subject we when received our food and I went along. I wanted to ask what his plans for Pirate were but figured it was better not to. When lunch was over we walked to other nice places of the city, including Central Park, and when the street lamps were lit Pirate said her goodbyes. "I'm glad I met you Sherry!" he shook my hand once more.

"Me too."

"I'll be seeing you soon Emma, remember to tell your family you're leaving okay?" she nodded and they kissed quickly before he departed.

"Family?"

"He means the newsies."

"So you've told 'em everything?"

"Everything he needs to know." She kicked a stone off the sidewalk as we started our way back home. "Besides I'm leaving soon what's the point of mentioning Seth?"

"I wasn't talking about him." I watched her face and a few seconds later I saw tears. "Pirate?" I rested my hand on her shoulder and she stopped walking.

"I can't tell them Vaudeville I just can't!" I knew what she was talking about and I gave her a hug.

"Why not?"

"I feel like I'll be disappointing them if I leave. After everything they've done for me."

"Pirate, I don't think they'll think you're abandoning them."

"Everyone they've ever known has left them and now I am too."

"Yes, and everyone has to grow up too. Leaving is a part of life and they know that, but leaving without saying anything will hurt them more." She nodded and wiped her eyes.

"I guess you're right."

"They know that sometimes you have to do these things for you. I'm sure they just want you to be happy." I rubbed her back and she nodded again. "Plus no one is stopping you from visiting."

"Yeah do you like him?"

"Mmhm, he's a nice guy." She smiled and I saw her blush.

"I know." I laughed.

"Come on lets get home." When we returned to the lodging house I didn't see Spot waiting for me. The only person that was there was Mush and he looked worried. Kloppman was patting him on the back when we entered and he spun around.

"Vaudeville, Pirate!" he yelled and I glanced at Kloppman his expression grim.

"What's wrong Mush? Where are the others?" Pirate asked taking a quick look around.

"Well..." he seemed as if he didn't want to tell us but Kloppman urged him on. "Someone has set fire to the Brooklyn warehouse and-" Before he could finish I turned and ran as fast as I could home. Images of Spot injured raced through my mind and I attempted to push them away. There was no way he would let a fire bring him down and I ignored the sick feeling in my stomach.

As I reached the warehouse I saw the flames. They had already engulfed most of the house and my breath caught in my throat. The fire department was there and I pushed myself to run the rest of the way. When I arrived at the scene some of the fire men tried to keep me back.

"You can't miss there's a fire!"

"I'm not blind!" I retorted and noticed Navy standing a few feet away. I began screaming his name and he turned and told the fireman to let me go. I pushed them away and frantically asked my question. "Where's Spot?!" he pointed towards a group of newsboys and I felt myself breathe when I saw him. He was standing staring blankly into the fire his face slightly illuminated and I could tell he was upset. The gold tip cane he normally carried was clenched in his right hand and I smiled. "Spot!" I screamed running forward. He turned around and when I reached him hugged me close. "Spot I was so scared..."

"I thought you would be." I pulled away and saw him pull a key over his neck.

"What's that?" he looked down and shrugged.

"This is a key to my old home, I thought for sure I had lost it in the fire but thankfully it was in my pocket."

"Your old home?"

"Yeah...I used to live in a house ya know."

"Where?"

"Stewart Avenue."

"Stewart Avenue?" I repeated and stepped away from him.

"Vaudeville?" I had the feeling that Spot was connected to a life that I tried to keep him from. "Are you alright?"

"Yes, I um remembered something is all." He nodded and we stood in silence until the fire was completely out.

"Where we gonna go now?" Striker asked Spot and he sighed. Most of the Brooklyn newsies stood crowded near him.

"Everyone will have to go to different Burroughs for a place to stay!" he yelled over the group of newsboys. "I'll see what I can do for a Brooklyn lodging house, but for now ask other leaders!" The boys groaned as they departed moving towards their friends. Spot turned to me and took my hand. "As for you and I we're going to Manhattan."

"That should be interesting." I muttered still shocked that Spot had once lived on Stewart Avenue.

"Spot!" Jack screamed storming down the steps. It had only been a couple of days and it was obvious the Brooklyn leader was overstaying his welcome.

"What?" I heard him yell back following close behind.

"I'm leader of Manhattan not you!"

"And I think I know a little more than you about coitain things!"

"That may be true but I know how to take care of my boys!" I sighed and stood from the chair I had been sitting in and made my way towards Spot and Jack. Spot was now glaring intensely at Jack and he seemed unaffected.

"Spot?" I said waving my hand in front of his face. Reluctantly his cold gaze was directed towards me and I smiled innocently. "How about we go somewhere?"

"Why?" I shrugged and bit my lip hoping he would pick up on the message I was sending. "Maybe to let you and Jack cool off some?" Hesitantly he brushed past Jack and I flashed an apologetic look at the Manhattan leader before closing the door behind Spot and I. "Jeez you'd think ya would murder the guy." I said stretching. Spot was obviously not amused and said nothing as we walked to some unknown destination. Finally we paused in front a small market before the distribution place.

"Vaude."

"Yeah?"

"I think I'm gonna go on by myself from here."

"Okay, um...are you okay?" he nodded but I could tell it was a lie.

"There oughta be other places you and I can stay." Before I could say anything he had moved on. I knew better than to follow him and as much as I hated leaving him alone when he was upset I knew he could take care of himself. My eyes fell to the ground and I walked blindly forward. There was nothing for me to do or anywhere for me to go. I knew that the day I had to meet up with Seth was drawing closer and I had to find the money soon. I couldn't bear knowing that if I didn't hold up my end of the deal that Spot and Pirate and anyone else I cared about would be hurt.

Navy's POV

Seth, his boys, and I were sitting crowded at a small round table. We were in a shady bar on the far side of Bottle Alley. It normally held various kinds of riff raffy people and I was not up to meeting here. Seth ignored my suggestions and I sighed as I shifted uneasily in my chair. The place barely had lights and a small lantern flickered beside us.

"In two days Sherry has to meet up with me."

"With the money right boss?" Slims asked excited. He nodded and I rolled my eyes.

"Alright so what's the plan?" I inquired glancing at the blank faces of the people that worked for Seth.

"Once I get the money I'm gonna kill her of course." Seth replied matter of factly as he waved one of the bar employees over. "Another round sweetie." As she walked away I scowled.

"If you kill her there's no way I can kill Spot, she's my only way to him." Seth shrugged and tapped his fingers along the wood of the table.

"Spot is not my problem. If you want 'em dead you figure out a way to kill him." I stood restraining myself from attacking Seth. Pulling on my cap I nodded to him.

"Fine. I'll see you in two days." Briskly I exited the bar and made my way back to Manhattan where I was currently residing. The fire at the warehouse had temporarily separated me from Spot and Sherry ruining my chances to watch them and make plans. I slowed down as I reached the old church near the newsboys lodging house. There was a small graveyard behind it and I pushed open the gate. It was obvious that it was barely kept up with as weeds and vines grew upon most of the headstones. North Side Church used to be a second home. This was the place I had met the love of my life and the same place I had buried her. I noticed a small bouquet of purple flowers and smiled as I knelt down. Her mother Maratha constantly visited and always brought something to adorn the grave with. I ran my hand over her name and took a deep breath. For the thousandth time I read the epitaph:

Josephine Anne Marcelo

1881-1898

_For death begins with life's first breath and life begins at touch of death_

I remembered her mother had insisted that be carved into the stone. "Josephine..." I whispered knowing very well she would never reply. "I'm going to get revenge I swear...soon." Standing I turned and jumped. The pastor of the church was standing his arms crossed his face gentle.

"Never thought I would see you again Navy." He said a trace of a smile upon his face. I couldn't help but smile back.

"Father John, how are you these days?"

"Very well my boy, very well." He uncrossed his arms and gestured towards the church. "Come in for some tea?" Reluctantly I agreed and followed him inside. I had spent most of my earlier years growing up in this very place. As I looked around I noticed that some things had changed. The church was much more run down as if no one had even bothered in the last few years to show up. "I see you visit Josephine every once and awhile...it used to be every day."

"I've been busy."

"With what?" Father John asked as we entered the kitchen. He placed the kettle on the stove top and turned to face me.

"Work."

"You've never been the type to make work your life." I shifted uneasily. If there was anyone in this world who could read me it would be Father John.

"Lately I have." He nodded and changed the subject.

"You should really visit Maratha."

"Why is that?"

"She's been asking about you, that and she's fallen quite ill." Immediately I was alarmed.

"Ill how?" John sighed and pulled down two mugs as the kettle began to whistle.

"I believe its heart break. It's only been a year since Josephine departed this world."

"Hard to believe." I responded.

"Anyway you're her last connection to her daughter, so see her." I nodded silently and accepted the tea. We drank in silence as I remembered the last days I saw Josephine alive. "She still has the ring you know." I stiffened and stood placing my cup in the sink. "You're going to have to face it Navy to let it go and forgive." I turned restraining the urge to scream.

"I forgive nothing. Good day Father." I exited the church as fast as I could. There was no way I would forgive Spot Conlon. He murdered my fiancé and took away the only person who made me feel not completely alone. My parents had forsaken me and left me on the streets of New York at the age of six with no memory. I would not sleep until I killed Spot Conlon and his blood created a puddle around my feet.

Vaudeville's POV

I felt as if I was visiting Stewart Avenue a little too much. The familiar house came into view and my stomach began to hurt. I wasn't sure if it was because I had been sick lately or if I was nervous. Today I had made the decision to enter the home for any chance of remembering where I had taken the money. Thankfully I had an excuse as I felt the vomit in my throat. Stumbling up the steps I knocked on the door hoping someone was home. A few seconds later it opened and a woman answered.

"Oh dear, are you alright?" she asked her hand on her chest looking concerned.

"May I please have a glass of water?" I asked wrapping my arm around my stomach.

"Of course have something to eat while you're here come in!" she exclaimed hesitantly placing her arm around my shoulders. Other maids and employees stood staring. The house seemed vacant and she stopped in the entrance of the dining room.

"_Isn't there another one boss?" Slims asked as he scanned the faces of the family they were holding hostage. Seth shrugged and placed his gun against the father's back. _

"_It doesn't matter now does it?"_

"_Where's Ian?" the mother asked her voice panicked as she glanced towards her husband. He shook his head as if to silence her. "But-" _

"_What do you want with my family?" the father asked cutting off his wife his voice shaky._

"_That doesn't matter either. Get up." Seth commanded and he stood. He pushed him down a hall and disappeared around the corner. Sherry watched fearfully as the men leered at the daughter and mother. She turned away tears falling down her face. A few seconds later Seth appeared holding papers in his hand. He shoved the father back towards his family and called Sherry over. _

"_Yes?" she asked wringing her hands uneasily. Seth shoved the papers in her hands. _

"_Hold these while we get rid of them." Her eyes widened and before she could call out Seth opened fire. The bodies of the innocent family fell and blood covered the wood floor. Sherry felt a surge of anger and she opened her mouth to scream. Seth turned and slapped her across the face. _

"_How could you!?" she screeched clutching the wall for support as she stood. _

"_Shut up Sherry." Seth gestured for his boys to silence her. She glanced towards Tommy who looked away as the others beat her. "Now give me the papers." The only thing she could think of to repay the family they had murdered was to not let Seth take the money. Turning she ran from the home as fast as she could. "Get her!" she could hear Seth scream from behind her. Nothing would make her stop she told herself as she ran to the other side of Manhattan. There was a small alley and without thinking she ducked inside and fell to her knees. Groping along the wall for some type of crack to hide the papers she found a loose brick and clawed at it until it fell. Her finger nails were bloody as they were briefly illuminated by the lamps on the street. She pushed the papers in the hole the brick occupied and shoved it back. A few seconds after she had hid it she heard the sound of multiple feet enter the alley._

"_Where is it Sherry?!" Benson screamed kicking her ribs. _

"_I don't know!" _

"_Liar!" without mercy and deaf to her pleas they beat her until she was close to being unconscious. "Let's just leave her." Benson spoke up as he wiped the bloodied tip of his boot on a nearby newspaper. _

"_I agree we'll tell Seth we couldn't find 'er." Slims spoke up and she heard their footsteps die away. _

"Here ya go." I jerked startled by the sudden calm voice and shook my head.

"I'm fine now thank you." I responded quickly feeling the vomit in my mouth now. Before she could protest I had dashed out the door and stumbled down the steps to the street. There I emptied my stomach and staggered forward until I slumped against a wall. I couldn't feel anything as I finally remembered everything. Now I was walking on a very dangerous line and soon I would fall off.

**A/n: Hey guys. I feel like it's been forever. Anywayz, I rushed to get this chapter up. Finals are happening in like four days at my school so don't know how busy i'm gonna be. Plus I'm moving after school gets out, but I should be able to write. Just a heads up. **

**Joker is Poker with a J- I did not acutally! I was on youtube one day and I saw the trailer and freaked! at first I was not happy at who they chose to be Edward because I dunno I viewed him differently but now I seriously have a count down! Its in 7 months. But Breaking Dawn is closer! whoo hoo! Thank you for your review!! **

**Thank you to everyone who has reviewed the last chapter and those who keep reviewing I love em! **


	18. The truth about heaven

Chapter Eighteen- The Truth about Heaven

Spot studied me cautiously as I drank in silence. Today I was supposed to meet Seth and my stomach couldn't seem to hold anything down except water. After I had returned from Stewart Avenue I had been this way. Aware that I was making him alarmed I glanced up and smiled awkwardly.

"Vaudeville...are you alright?" he asked his eyes narrowing as I choked on the last bit of liquid I had swallowed. Wiping my mouth with the back of my hand I nodded.

"Course why wouldn't I be?" he shrugged and stood when I did.

"This is our day off an' you're acting strange." I sighed and briskly walked away from the bench we had been sitting on.

"Sorry." I mumbled as I pondered ways to get Spot away from me. Yesterday I had received another note stating that I was to meet Seth's gang around 1:00 pm at the new bar. I felt that it had been bad luck when Spot claimed that we would take a day off. Now I knew why he had made that decision. Most likely I had worried him with my quiet demeanor and lack of interest in him and he probably assumed I was upset with him. "So when are we supposed to move into the Queens lodging house?"

"Sometime today." Spot had found us a place to stay momentarily while Kloppman gathered the nuns so they could ask the governor of New York to help re build a home in Brooklyn for newsboys. I wasn't fond of Queens, though my sister was there and reluctantly I told Spot I would stay there with him. "We could go now." I shook my head and stopped searching for a clock. When there was none to be found I tapped a young gentleman on the shoulder.

"Excuse me." I said flashing a quick smile, "But may I ask you for the time?" He lifted his chin slightly as he pulled out a pocket watch. Snapping it shut and closing his stubby fingers around it firmly he replied.

"Quarter to One." And without another word dashed in the opposite direction that Spot and I were standing.

"Why did ya need to know the time?" I turned to Spot and forced an innocent smile.

"I'm supposed to meet up with Pirate at Tibby's at one."

"And?"

"So I'll talk to you later?"

"No." he crossed his arms over his chest his eyes reverted back to slits. "Something's goin' on with you and I wanna know what it is." I sighed loudly and rolled my eyes trying to be nonchalant.

"_Nothing_ is going on." I reassured him for the hundredth time.

"Don't lie to me." His voice was cool and I could tell he was getting aggravated.

"Spot...trust me." I rested my hand on his arm and he stiffened as I moved in closer. "Can ya do that, huh?" His jaw tightened as he stepped away from me.

"Manhattan lodging house...in three hours." My face split into a fake grin and I hugged him quickly.

"Thank you!" before he could change his mind I disappeared around the corner. My grin faded and my confidence drained. I was facing Seth alone and unarmed. There was no way of telling whether or not he had something planned. Knowing him as well as I did he would most likely want to off me or use me in some way after giving him what he wanted. Turning into the alley I had hid the papers I paused. It was cold and dark and memories I had never wanted revisited me as I ventured farther into the nightmare that had plagued me for so long. Lowering my self to the last place I had remembered being I ran my hand along the grimy bricks. At my fourth attempt to find the hiding place my fingers caused the red stone to move inward. Jumping my heart began to race as I pulled at it allowing it to fall on the cobble stone with a thud. Sure enough inside the black hole was a flash of white and my shaking fingers grasped it. Unfolding the dirty papers I found codes and such for some type of bank account, along with deeds to the house. My eyes watered as I thought back to the innocent family slaughtered for these documents that I now held in shaking hands. There was no way that I could possibly give these to Seth. I felt as if I would be betraying the murdered souls that now rested under six feet of dirt, betraying the one missing son who had escaped, it was he who was the rightful owner of these papers. Shoving them into my pockets I balanced myself on the wall as I stumbled from the alley and back into daylight. A new determination struck me at once and I knew that I wouldn't let Seth win. Swiftly I made my way to the Manhattan Lodging house desperate to find anything that would look similar to what Seth wanted. If I could trick him for just a few days I might have enough time to...to what? I asked myself as I rounded the corner leading to my destination. Run? Of course that was what I had done in the past and that was one thing I was best at. It occurred to me as I stepped through the doorway that if I ran it would leave those I loved in danger, possibly not Pirate since she was leaving soon, leaving this mess behind her, but Spot who had innocently been dragged into a conflict I had never resolved. "Kloppman!" I called my eyes falling upon a clock. It read 1:00 and my heart fluttered. He appeared slowly behind the large desk and I smiled. "Do you have a stack of papers?" I inquired hoping he did. His knobby fingers rubbed his chin as he nodded slowly.

"As a matter of fact I do." He responded turning and making his way down a dark hall. I tapped my fingers along the wooden table top noticing that I was only finding courage through adrenaline. He returned with about a dozen old log book papers and I accepted them. I ran out the door calling a quick thanks as I made my way to the bar. Before I entered I stopped and folded six to make it seem like the documents I had stashed in my pocket. Catching my breathing and pulling myself together I entered the bar. It wasn't as lively as it usually was at night but there were still a few people occupying space. No one seemed to take notice that I was there as I made my way to the back door I had been pushed through the last time I were here. Biting my lip I pushed it open to reveal Seth and my least favorite people standing in a small circle. They looked up and Seth emerged from the group smiling.

"Sherry!" he called as if I were an old friend visiting for afternoon tea. I let the door slip from my fingers and it closed behind me. Keeping myself firmly planted on the top step I watched him as he moved towards me. His eyes flickered to the fake papers in my hand. "Are those what I think they are?" he asked his voice leaking with the greed I had known all too well.

"Yes." I choked out hoping my plan would work. I scanned the men's faces as Seth stopped on the first step. They seemed as if they were waiting for something and my heart pounded harder against my chest. I thought for sure it would rip through my skin and blood would gush out.

"Then how about ya give them to me?" Seth's voice was calm and collected as if soothing a wild animal. Carefully I passed them to his eager waiting hand. Quickly he pulled away from me turning his back and pushing the false papers into his pocket. "I really enjoyed this time with ya Sherry," He began and I noticed Benson reach into his pants. "But I don't think I wanna have ya around just incase you might let something slip." My eyes widened at the glint of metal and I knew Seth had never intended to allow me to leave the bar alive. Before Benson could make a move I swung the door open. He seemed a quick draw as two bullets narrowly missed me as I raced for my life. Once on the streets I didn't stop and multiple hiding places flew through my head. All seemed easy places to find me except one, Stewart Avenue. Skidding to a halt I changed my direction not bothering to look behind my shoulder.

Navy's POV

I stretched and threw my remaining papes away from me. Selling newspapers was something I did to pass the time. I lived with a wealthy family and had a much larger income than the newsboys I was acquainted with. The only reason why I had integrated myself into their insignificant society was to get close to Spot.

"Navy!" I turned to see Slims waving towards me and stopping to catch his breath. I wondered if they had killed Sherry and I felt anger that they were destroying my chances of luring Spot into my trap.

"What?" I asked when he caught up with me.

"Sherry escaped!" Suddenly my mood changed and a smile spread across my face.

"Escaped?" Slims nodded solemnly, "Did she hand over the papers?" there was another meek nod.

"Seth wants you to help find her." I rolled my eyes and began walking once more. "Where you going?!" Slims asked matching his pace as he walked beside him.

"Nowhere."

"Are you gonna find Sherry?" Deciding it was best to lie in this situation I said I was. Slims left my side and I immediately started to make plans. If Sherry did not show up then I would assume she ran away. Once I was positive she wouldn't show up lie to Spot and lead him to an uninhabited place perfect for his murder, then dump his body in the water. I hadn't thought about what I would do after getting my revenge but I quickly thought of leaving New York and going somewhere far away.

Vaudeville's POV

I had moved towards the back of the house and found an old wooden swing. My stomach flipped as I thought about the people searching New York ready to murder me. There was no way I could explain this to Spot without the truth, something he had waited a long time for. Going over my options I decided that I could disguise myself and finally tell Spot why I had to leave. Slowly I stood from the swing and went around to the front. I stared up at the large home not paying attention to my surroundings and felt myself impact with something hard. Before I could fall they had caught my arm and pulled me upright.

"What are you doin' heah?" I could barely find the ability to speak. Spot was standing in front of me, in front of the same place this whole mess had started. Finally everything registered and I shook my head. "I thought you had to meet Pirate." He continued and I said nothing. "Vaudeville!" he shook me slightly and I swallowed hard. With a deep breath I conjured up a quick lie.

"I already met her and I wanted to take a walk and found myself here." He seemed not to believe me but didn't ask anymore questions. His eyes moved to the house at our right and I saw a longing inside his blue eyes. "Spot?" I felt myself calming down as I checked to see if anyone I recognized was standing near. He seemed to be having an internal struggle of some sort before turning back to me.

"You see that house?" My eyes shifted to where he had previously been staring and I felt nauseated. I knew what he was about to say and every feeling I had was to be confirmed in a matter of seconds.

"Yes." I muttered and he sighed.

"I used to live there." My eyes closed and I felt as if my heart was tearing apart. Spot's real name was Ian, the same name the woman had said before she died. He continued speaking as if he couldn't stop. "I had a family once and we were wealthy and happy." I listened feeling my insides churn. "I was like you...I felt that I didn't deserve it."

"Spot why are you telling me this?" I finally asked the guilt I felt overwhelming. He stared at me and shook his head.

"Vaudeville, Sherry..." he trailed off and rested an ink stained hand on my cheek. "I trust you and I prolly shouldn't but I do. I trust you enough to tell you somethin' that I have been keeping inside for awhile now. What I want to know is how long it's gonna take you to trust me." I felt tears run down my face as I inhaled a ragged breath.

"Spot I do trust you."

"If you did you'd tell me what is happenin' and don't tell me nothin'!" his voice rose a little and I reached up to wipe my tears away.

"Spot, I need to leave for a few days." His expression tightened and he quickly pulled away from me. "Please it's not you!" I felt desperate as my voice pleaded for him to understand. I was in turmoil. I murdered his family I took away his life, a life he could have had if he had never spoken to me in Central Park.

"Go Vaudeville just go."

"Spot I need you to understand-"

"Understand!?" he screamed as his eyes flashed with anger. "Since the day I've met you you've been keepin' up some twisted charade! I know you're hiding somethin' Sherry and I'm not goin' to continue to act dumb. Men have been chasin' you and attempting to hoit you and Pirate somehow is involved as well and you expect me to blindly let you lead me into a death trap!" I was positive the whole neighborhood could hear his screams of rage and all I could do was cry.

"I'm not leading you into a death trap...I would never intentionally hurt you..." I spoke only loud enough for him to hear.

"I'm tired of your lies Sherry and until you can tell me the truth and decide what you wanna do then get out."

"What?"

"Get. Out. Don't come back! Don't show yourself in Brooklyn or Manhattan! I refuse to be lied to anymore so go make your decision somewhere away from me!" I reached for his arm and he shrugged me off and without another word he left me alone. I stood staring blankly ahead. This was what I had wanted right?

**A/n: Alright this isn't as long a update as I would love it to be. But I have so much to do for finals that it just isn't funny. I hope you guys enjoy this one! and thank you so much for those who have reviewed my story and given me tips on how to better my writing. I appreciate it a ton! **

**Joker is Poker with a J- Emmet is pretty awesome. I love how he teases Bella I think thats pretty funny. But I hope the movie doesn't turn out bad, usually that happens when awesome books become movies. But I seriously think Twilight is my favorite vampire book ever! I love Stephanie Meyer she inspires me as an author. **


	19. All over you

Chapter Nineteen- All over you

Spot's POV

I ran a hand through my hair as I watched Kloppman talk with the mayor. We had decided to start building plans today and naturally I was expected to come. My eyes wandered from the two older men and rested on the slightly cracked window. A warm breeze blew in from outside and ruffled a small stack of papers on his desk. Two weeks ago I had kicked Vaudeville out and now I felt immense guilt.

"Spot?" I jumped and turned to find Kloppman staring directly at me.

"What?" I asked sitting straighter in the chair I had been slouching in.

"Is that alright with you?" I nodded deciding that whatever Kloppman had decided was fine with me. We ended the meeting and I thanked them both and made my way towards the Manhattan Lodging House. I had been sending Navy everywhere to find any whereabouts of Vaudeville. Her sister knew something but she had refused to express any information about her sister and I was back to where I started from. Pirate had also said she knew nothing and that I believed since she had been worried sick. I refused to tell anyone the real reason for why Vaude had decided to suddenly disappear. The excuses I had created seemed to not be believable and everyone seemed on edge.

"Spot!" I stopped in front of the door that led inside to the newsboy's home and turned. Navy stood behind me an unhappy expression plastered to his face. I had taken my rage out on him multiple times since her disappearance and he obviously had no new information.

"Nothing?" I ventured and he shook his head solemnly. I shrugged and turned away from him.

"Spot I don't think we're going to find her." I clenched my jaw and my eyes narrowed. He continued despite my sudden rigid appearance. "It's been two weeks she obviously doesn't want to be found."

"See you later." I replied my tone venomous. Navy said nothing more and I heard his footsteps die away. I entered the lodging house and scanned the entrance room. Most likely most of them were selling papers and I sighed plopping down in Kloppman's favorite chair. I assumed he wasn't here since he had said he had to run an errand. "Vaudeville..." I mumbled closing my eyes. I smirked as I remembered her smile and laugh and the warmth of her-

"Spot!" For the second time today I jumped forward. Pirate stood in front of me her hands clasped firmly in front of her as if she were expecting something.

"What do ya want woman!?" I replied sighing and picking my hat off the floor to place it back on my head.

"Have ya found Vaudeville?" I shook my head and the guilt I felt once again attacked me.

"Don't ya think I'd tell ya if I did?" I snapped and she sighed.

"I know something else happened besides she went away with her sister." I licked my lips and gritted my teeth. "What really happened Spot?"

"I don't know!" I spun around raising my fist as if I were about to punch her. She flinched and I squeezed my eyes shut. Stepping away from her I braced myself against the doorframe. "I don't know." I repeated my temper falling. "I came to ask if you heard anything."

"I haven't." I nodded and exited the lodging house. I made my way towards Queens. I had been staying there for awhile and the same problems I had with Jack seemed to plague me. It was hard for me to step down from a role as a leader and watch someone else do the job. My thoughts strayed to Vaudeville once more something that happened regularly. I couldn't wipe her from my mind I couldn't possibly sleep easy knowing that she was somewhere out there and I didn't know where. What had I been thinking? Why did I run her off? Sure she hadn't told me the truth since the day I met her, but I loved her. I remembered the day I confessed my feelings and wondered if I had contradicted what I said. I told her that I never wanted to know what it was like to live without her. That at least was true. I hated the way I felt as I thought about her, as I thought about what I said. I especially hated that I felt anything when I thought of her never coming back. There was no way around the solution. I had to find Vaudeville or die trying.

Vaudeville's POV

"Not there!" I threw my dish towel to the side and wiped my hands on my apron. Sam rushed over and snatched the plate from the sink placing it in its proper place. "You've been here two weeks and you still don't know where things go!?" she exclaimed and I rolled my eyes as I seated myself at the kitchen table. "When Alice lived with me she had caught on immediately."

"I'm sorry Sam but I'm not Alice I'm Sherry!"

"No doubt in my mind you aren't Alice." She turned and narrowed her eyes when she saw me resting. "Get up girl what are ya doing? We still have a lot of work to do before sunset!" I sighed and stood continuing to wash the dishes. Samantha Kessler was Alice's and I cousin. She was much older than us but she kept her door open if either of us needed to get away from the city. Since her young age of 18 she had refused to marry and establish a family, though she had had many offers in the past. Instead she went against everything society believed women should be and moved out to the countryside of New York. Alice suggested I go and stay with her until I had made my decision regarding Spot. Slowly I finished my job and moved onto my second of kneading dough for bread. Sam studied me her eyes slits as I followed her instructions. Despite the obvious fights we both often had I enjoyed living the simple life. I already had a set routine and of course this was much easier than being a newsie.

"Sam?" I asked when we both had seated ourselves at the table for supper. She looked up from the roast she was serving herself.

"Yes?"

"Why did you decide not to marry?" She sighed finishing serving herself and passing the fork to me.

"What a complicated question." She began taking a large bite of mashed potatoes. "It's an awful long story."

"I believe we have time." She shook her head and watched me clearly amused as I filled my plate with everything on the table. Lately I had been eating her out of house and home.

"I'm more interested in how you can eat so much and not gain a pound." I looked at my plate and blushed slightly.

"I haven't always eaten like this." I responded quickly taking a bite. I was determined to eat most of it so it looked like I had taken regular amounts.

"Hmm." she said and I glanced up. She seemed to be thinking intently about something and my curiosity sparked.

"What?" I inquired as she smirked.

"Alice told me in a recent letter that you have a boyfriend." I shifted uneasily in my seat and resumed eating. The silence was awkward and I wished Alice had kept my business to herself. Sam was not the type of person to discuss matters of love for she had never really experienced it. Once I had swallowed I noticed she was still waiting for a reply.

"That's right."

"What's his name?"

"She didn't tell you that too?" I asked my tone bitter. Sam noticed and chuckled as she finished up her plate.

"No."

"S-"I caught myself and decided real names were better. "Ian, Ian Conlon."

"Sounds like a nice boy."

"He can be." I smiled slightly as I thought about his temper that sometimes could get out of control. Quickly I doused my thoughts with the images of his family's murder and my by standing as it happened. Sam recognized my sudden change of mood and stood from the table. She retrieved mine and her plate and threw it into the soapy water I had run before we had begun eating.

"Are you two not together anymore?" I shrugged and began clearing our remaining dishes. I doubted Spot wanted anything to do with me since he had sent me away the moment I wouldn't confess my secrets. In some ways I could understand his frustration and in others I couldn't. I was saving him from the pain that the truth would cause him, wasn't I? Many times as I lay in bed I had thought what the truth would bring closer. It would explain to the last heir of the Conlon fortune what had truly happened to his family the night he wasn't there. Sam changed the subject and I was relieved. Spot was a tender area and I would much rather not speak about the infamous leader of Brooklyn.

My days consisted of hard work, cooking, and cleaning which I took seriously. By the end of my third week I had learned how to bake numerous items and cook multiple meals. Sam had expressed her surprise and admiration for how fast I had caught on to being a house wife. She even teased me occasionally by asking if this Spot fellow would want a wife as good as me. I doubted Spot was the type to come home to a hot meal waiting for him on the table, three kids and a wife always dolled up just to see him. In my mind he wouldn't trade in street life for a job at a large building in Manhattan. He would continue being infamous and continue being a symbol of the streets.

"Sam!" I called one morning when I had finished getting rid of breakfast. She entered my bedroom just as I was dumping the vomit from a bowl out the window.

"Are you sick?" she asked rushing to my side. This had been the first time she had ever shown true concern and even for a small instance acted motherly.

"I constantly throw up in the morning." I explained wiping my mouth with my apron. "It's almost normal I suppose."

"Is that what you wanted me for?" her voice sounding as if she were pondering something.

"I was wondering if I could borrow some clothes, I seemed to have gained a lot of weight."

"Sure, sure." She replied after a small moment of hesitation. "Are you positive you can continue morning chores?" I nodded still clutching my stomach. Sam obviously did not believe my poor attempt at reassurance but allowed me to follow her to her bedroom. Her room was filled with random objects and I could barely make out the bed for the numerous things piled on top of it. She rummaged for a few seconds in the depths of a large pile of clothes and produced a few dresses.

"Thank you." I said nodding my head and returning to my own bedroom. After I had changed I made my ways downstairs. The only chore I had to complete before the afternoon meal was scrubbing the kitchen floor and with the way I felt at the moment I wasn't in the mood. Sam's angry face imbedded itself in my mind and I decided against skipping out. She always complained when there weren't clean floors especially in the kitchen. I filled the bucket with water and soap and waited a few minutes for the sharp pain I felt to subside. Then quickly before I felt it once more I got down on all fours and began to scrub.

Normal POV

Sam entered the house exhausted. Farm work was never her favorite thing to do, but if she didn't complete it no one would. As she changed her clothes upstairs she hoped Sherry had finished cleaning the kitchen because she hated cooking on dirty counters and floors. Stretching her aching bones she thought about what to make for lunch when she gasped. Sherry was lying on the still wet floor the bucket of water turned over. Her face was blank and her mouth slightly open. One arm was tucked underneath her as if holding her stomach and the other was above her head clenched around the rag she had been using. Sam rushed to her side and checked her pulse before dashing outside to find help.

Vaudeville's POV

My eyes fluttered open at the sound of muffled voices. I raised my hand and rested it on my forehead at an attempt to stop the pain. Once everything came into focus I recognized Sam and another man I had never seen before standing a few inches from my bed.

"Sherry!" she exclaimed and the man turned to me. He seemed to have an aggravated expression as he pulled a chair to my beside. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm alive." I responded because 'great' was not in my vocabulary at the moment. Sam rolled her eyes and her alarm disappeared.

"I can tell your sarcasm hasn't been knocked out of ya!" I smiled weakly and turned my attention to the man who had cleared his throat rather loudly.

"Ms. Kessler may I have a moment alone with Ms. Brown?" Sam turned to him and reluctantly nodded before exiting the room. I swallowed wondering if he was going to tell me that I was dying and only had a few months to live. We sat in a deathly silence before he spoke. "Do you know why you fainted?" he inquired scribbling on a packet of papers. I shook my head.

"Is that what happened?" he narrowed his eyes slightly.

"Yes Ms. Brown that is what happened." He snapped and immediately I knew he most likely did not want to be here and I didn't understand why he chose to be doctor, at least the job I assumed him to have, if he did not want to help people. "Anyway, do you know why?"

"No I don't." he straightened in his chair and folded his hands tightly over his lap once he had set down his writing utensil.

"You were overexerting yourself, and usually when you're pregnant that is not a safe thing to do."

"When you're what?" I asked my stomach lurching at his words.

"_Pregnant_ Ms. Brown I hope you understand what that means." I nodded my head and I felt my mouth fall slightly open. "Do you have a husband?" I seemed to had lost my ability to speak at that moment and shook my head. His tone became much nastier as he responded. "Where is the father?"

"In Brooklyn I think." I didn't recognize the small voice that had escaped my lips.

"_You think_?" he repeated making disapproving noises. "Do you plan on notifying him of his child?" The fact that I was soon to be a mother hadn't crossed my mind let alone telling Spot so I decided not to answer. The man took this as opportunity to continue chastising me on my irresponsible decision. "I pray the child finds a better home for you don't look like a suitable mother." I was curious at that moment of my appearance. To soon had he judged me the moment he found out that I was pregnant and was not married.

"What makes you say that sir?" I inquired not sounding as offended as I felt.

"First you're living with an old woman who has chosen a less than reasonable path for any lady, and second you're not even sure where the father of this poor child resides let alone you're how old?"

"Seventeen." My voice had grown soft and he laughed coldly.

"_Seventeen_, how irresponsible." Sam had thankfully come to my rescue at this point. She ordered him to leave and said that she would take care of my health throughout my pregnancy. The doctor nodded curtly to her and swiftly left the house. She turned to me and smiled apologetically.

"Don't mind him Sherry he's always pessimistic like that." She had lost her mean edge and I wondered if it was because she felt sorry for me.

"Its fine I'm used to people like that. I did live on the streets before now." I sighed the new information I had received slowly registering in my brain. "How far along am I?"

"I'm not positive if I really paid attention. He mumbled it so low but I think he said about three months." Instinctively my hand rested on my stomach. Everything made sense and I felt like I was finally putting together the puzzle that I had refused to work on all this time. "Is it Ian's baby?" At first I was confused at whom she was speaking about and then I remembered Spot. The overwhelming guilt I normally felt overrode my other emotions as Spot's mother's voice echoed in my head.

"Yes it is," I paused as I felt tears. "And I don't know if I should tell him or not." Spot had told me he only wanted me back if I decided to tell him the truth and the truth was one thing I felt I could never tell. If I kept our child to myself then he would eventually move on and forget I even existed and I could raise the baby myself, but if I told him then he would hate me forever and I couldn't bear that thought. In my mind either way our child ended up without a father and without any options but to risk its life with me. I felt Sam grab my shoulders and hug me tightly as I began to sob. She most likely felt that my hormones were responsible but I knew they weren't. The day I had been dreading was moving closer than before. Deep inside I knew I couldn't deny Spot what he truly deserved and that was the truth.

**A/n: I'm so sorry ya'll I did not edit this at all!! if you find mistakes I apologize. I have a headache that is maiming me and I'm amazed I even got this out. **


	20. Closer to the truth

Chapter Twenty- Closer to the truth

"Do you have everything?" I nodded and smiled weakly. Sam helped me load the rest of my items into the carriage that would be taking me back into the City. She had been nice enough to give me clothes and take out the band in my pants so I could wear them much later. "Are you sure you don't want to stay until the baby's born?"

"I'm positive. It's best that I tell him now." Sam stood in silence for a few moments before gently taking my arm and leading me away from the driver.

"Remember when you asked me why I didn't get married?" I gave her a confused expression and she sighed deeply. "When I was a little bit older than you I had fallen in love." Her eyes seemed distant as she remembered her past. "His parents didn't agree with our relationship when they heard that I was pregnant." My eyes widened at her confession.

"You were _pregnant_?" I said and she smiled at my surprise.

"At one time yes." Her voice grew softer and her eyes cold. "I thought it was a strange coincidence that we were chosen that night to be attacked." She paused and I could tell that she was struggling to continue.

"It's okay Sam you don't have to tell me."

"Sherry, they murdered him and I lost my baby after they had worked a number on me." I saw tears fall and I hugged her tightly. "I have never loved anyone else. In my mind I'm already married and I would never betray him. I know it may sound crazy to someone as young as you..." she trailed off and I pulled away to smile at her.

"Sam it's what you believe and I won't argue with you."

"I just want you to be careful I don't want you to end up like me. Alone, without even a child to remember the man you love."

"Thank you Sam." Hugging her once more I promised that I would come back soon and climbed into the carriage. I wasn't sure what would happen but I knew that I couldn't hide from Spot, Seth or the truth. It was time I confessed and I hoped that Spot might be able to forgive me.

Spot's POV

I stretched after I had finished selling my papers. It was coming up on a month since Vaudeville's disappearance and I grew anxious everyday that I hadn't found her. Everywhere I went there were times I swore I would see her only to find out that it was some other girl that looked similar. After a few days I felt like there were multiple seventeen year olds that had long blonde hair and brown eyes and eventually I stopped stopping everyone I saw that fit Vaudeville's description. Shoving my hands in my pockets I went over what else I had to do today. The Brooklyn Lodging House was finally under construction and I had been over there a couple of times to see the progress. My boys had noticed me and seemed excited that we wouldn't be living in a warehouse. I wanted to share in their enthusiasm about our new home but my mind was on much bigger issues.

"I know Seth!" I fell against the wall next to an alley opening at the familiar voice. _What's Navy doing talking to Seth?_ I thought to myself as I listened in on their conversation. "Sherry is missing we still haven't found her!"

"That bitch. She always finds some place to hide, never the type to face things." Seth replied his tone bitter. "I know she has the money I want."

"She has your money but she's also my key to Spot Conlon." I narrowed my eyes at the mention of my name and strained my hearing when Navy's voice dropped. "We could lie ya know." Navy whispered.

"Lie? What the hell do you mean?" Seth's voice had risen and I could hear Navy sigh.

"Maybe if we claimed that Spot was dead we could lead her into a trap."

"You think she would hear that?"

"Sure. News travels fast." I quietly shuffled away. It never occurred to me that Navy had been betraying me and Vaudeville this whole time. As I pondered that fact more things seemed to make sense and I gritted my teeth. There was no way I would let them kill Vaudeville, at least not while I was alive.

Navy's POV

I smirked at Seth's suggestion after I had introduced the idea of lying. I felt that the day I would watch Spot Conlon take his last breath was drawing much closer and I could barely contain my excitement. My first mission was to lure Sherry into Manhattan and I needed a few old friends. I made my way into Harlem and reached into my pocket resting my hand on the pistol I had bought a few days ago. Harlem usually contained the type of people that weren't scared to kill you if you looked at them wrong. I pushed open the doors to a bar that was a popular hang out for the working class.

"Navy!" I turned and smiled. Hell Raiser motioned for me to join him and I made my way to the back of the room. He was the leader of a gang that worked for politicians or anyone that needed someone murdered. "What brings ya here?" he inquired pulling his arm back from around a girl I had never seen before. She smiled at me and I assumed she was some type of prostitute.

"I need a favor." He smirked and kicked out an empty chair.

"Take a seat." He pulled out a cigarette and lit it taking a long drag. "What can I do for ya?" I shifted uneasily in my seat when I noticed the glares I was receiving around the room.

"There's this girl and I need her dead." He nodded and I continued. "Her name is Sherry Brown but usually she goes by the name Vaudeville."

"Vaudeville?" he chuckled quietly offering me a cigarette. I shook my head and he shrugged placing it behind his ear. "So where is she?"

"That's the problem."

"I can't hunt unless I know where my prey is."

"Seth and I devised a plan."

"Okay."

"We're gonna lead her into Manhattan around that new bar."

"And?"

"We need you and whoever you decide to bring to help us."

"How hard is it to kill a girl?" He snubbed his cigarette out on the table and took a sip of his whiskey. "I only take serious jobs Navy and you know that. Plus I don't see any benefit if I were to kill this _Vaudeville_."

"She's Spot Conlon's girlfriend." Suddenly Hell Raiser's mood changed and motioned the girl that had been hanging on him to leave.

"Conlon has a girlfriend?" his voice was venomous and I smiled at my accomplishment.

"You and I both have a problem with the Brooklyn leader so help us kill Vaudeville and you can assist me in murdering that bastard." He leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms.

"I know you Navy. I bet you're gonna want to really work over Conlon, if you guarantee I can get a good shot at that little bitch than we have a deal." I clenched my jaw but nodded.

"Deal." I said reaching out my hand. Hell Raiser shook it and I exited the bar. There was no way Sherry would be able to escape this time. Hell Raiser was one of the best assassins you could hire.

Vaudeville's POV

I felt uneasy as I made my way to the Manhattan Lodging House. Every corner I turned I expected Seth to be there waiting for me. When I had entered Manhattan I had heard strange rumors that Spot was extremely hurt. I knew that Pirate would know for sure and I felt relieved when I saw the Newsboys home coming into view. It had annoyed me that I couldn't run because I had previously had problems with my baby, and images of Spot severely injured plagued my thoughts as I walked.

Kloppman's face lit up when he saw me enter the lodging house.

"Vaudeville!" he exclaimed coming from behind his desk and patting me on the back. "Everyone has been worried about you." I nodded.

"Is Pirate here?"

"She's upstairs. You caught her just in time." I brushed past him and climbed the stairs as fast as I could.

"Pirate! Pirate!" I called ducking into the bunkroom.

"Vaudeville!" I turned and saw a flash of black curls and then felt myself being tackled. She was screaming as she hugged me tightly.

"Pirate let go!" I said attempting to push her off. Quickly she released me and I saw tears.

"You're lucky I'm in a good mood or else I would slap you!" she wiped her face with the back of her hand as she studied me. Her eyes moved to my stomach and I noticed the change in her expression. "Are you..."

"Yeah." I replied and I heard another chorus of screams.

"Why now!" she exclaimed pulling me into the bedroom that had been hers in the lodging house. "Ethan and I are leaving today." I felt my heart sink but I knew that the first thing I had to do was address Spot.

"Pirate is Spot okay?" she paused and turned to me confused.

"Yeah I just saw him five minutes ago. He came to say goodbye and of course asked me about you." Her eyes lit up. "Did you see him on your way here?" I shook my head and my stomach lurched at the thought that I could had run into him, but at the same time relieved that the rumors hadn't been true. "He's been so out of it since you've been gone. None of the newsies believed that he could get so flustered over a girl. No offense of course." She looked up at me and our eyes locked. "I didn't think ya guys were that serious, and now you're pregnant, with his kid right?" I rolled my eyes at her suggestion that I had been with another man.

"Yes Pirate it's his child." She held her hands up at my tone and smirked.

"Just makin' sure, jeez Vaude." She smiled as she closed her suitcase. "Do you want to come and see me off?" I didn't want to say goodbye but I decided that seeing Pirate leave could help buy time until I had to face Spot.

"Yeah let's go." I said as I offered to help her with her suitcase but she shook her head telling me that pregnant women shouldn't be lifting anything.

"Ya know too much stress isn't a good thing either." She said as we walked towards the train station.

"Too late for that then."

"How do you think Spot's gonna react?" she inquired and I shrugged.

"I'm not sure and I'm not looking forward to telling him."

"The truth will set you free."

"Oh yeah? What about Elijah? Did you tell him about his girlfriend that you murdered?" she looked around as if she was expecting the police to apprehend her right there.

"Vaudeville don't bring that up." She responded her voice dropping to a low whisper.

"Well?"

"I never said anything to him, but I thought he knew for awhile."

"Oh really?" She nodded still whispering.

"One night he questioned me about it and I told him I didn't know anything. Eventually he gave up on tryin' to find her."

"I thought I saw an article about her in the papes."

"Yeah, but I guess we did a good job on hidin' her body. Who would expect a couple of newises anyway?"

"Obviously Elijah." She shrugged.

"Well he gave up didn't he?" her voice returned to normal volume. "Anyway here we are." She set her suitcase down when we reached the platform.

"Emma!" We both turned to see Ethan dashing towards us waving two train tickets. He shoved them in his pocket and hugged her spinning her slightly. I watched envious at their happy laughter and genuine smiles. My heart ached as I wished Spot and I could be like that. Unfortunately I was involved with the people that murdered his family and now I brought news and evidence that I carried his child. "Oh I didn't see ya there Sherry." Ethan extended his hand and I shook it faking a smile. He noticed my stomach and his smile broadened. "Wow you're expecting?!"

"Yeah surprising huh?"

"I bet your husband is extremely happy that he's gonna be a father!" I thought it was interesting that he assumed I was married and I wondered if newsies registered in his mind. If I was married why would I have been working on the streets for little pay every day? Pirate changed the subject when she took note of my expression. We didn't have a long time to talk because we could all hear the train growing closer. Pirate turned to me and I could see the sudden wave of emotion she felt.

"I'll come and visit soon." I said hoping that I would live till then. It seemed I had a lot of people I promised to come and visit. She wrapped her arms around me and for a moment I thought she would never let me go.

"You're my best friend Vaudeville...you better come and visit me soon." We laughed and I saw her tears. The train had stopped and I saw Ethan grab their suitcases and begin to load them. "Plus I wanna see that cute little baby when it's born." I smiled. She rummaged in the pocket of her dress and produced a small piece of paper. "Here's my address. Send me lots of letters okay?" Ethan appeared at her side wrapped his arm around her shoulders.

"I'm sure we'll be seeing you soon Sherry." He said at a failed attempt to comfort me. As I studied them together for a second I felt like Ethan was more like her father than lover.

"You can bet on it." We hugged once more and they hurried towards the door of the train when the warning whistle blew. As the train began to move forward I found myself moving with it. I saw a window open and Pirate extend her hand to wave. I stopped when the platform ended and waved back. My heart seemed to tighten as the train disappeared. It was hard to believe that Pirate had run off to the west. Part of me was happy that she had found someone she loved and loved her back. I was happy that she no longer had to toil on the streets any longer and Seth would never find her again. On the other hand I wished for her to return because she was my comfort. She knew what I had gone through and like she had said she was my best friend. I smiled as I thought back to the first day I had met her. She had been curt and attempted to teach me the lessons a newsie should always know. Those were the days that I had lived in peace before Seth decided to rear his ugly head. Turning I made my way away from the train station and towards Queens. I wasn't sure where Spot would be but there were only so many places to search. Whether it was by running into him on the street or where he normally would reside I knew that eventually I would run into the Brooklyn boy. Clutching my stomach I took deep breaths as I went over what I would say to him. There were no words it felt that could possibly explain what I had to tell him. I knew though that I was procrastinating and with new determination I began to walk faster.

"Vaudeville!?" I stopped walking and glanced around at who had said my name. "Vaudeville!" I spun around quickly and saw Spot waving his hand. For an interval of a second I thought about running but I rooted myself in place by wrapping my hand around a lamp post. Spot stopped in front of me his blue eyes holding mine in an intense gaze. I opened my mouth to speak but never got the chance. Spot pulled me forward into a hug and I felt him relax when my arms hesitantly wrapped around him. "I thought I would never see you again." He breathed and it seemed like his voice was shaking.

"Spot." I mumbled into his shirt and he pulled away from me to look into my eyes once more. "I have something to tell you."

**A/n: Okay so here's another update!! I hope you guys enjoy it. This time I edited it. Thank you so much to those who have reviewed! **

**Joker is poker with a J: I liked the Juno reference in your review! I love that movie. **

**Kathryn Mason-Sykes: I know it is a lot for one person to handle. Personally I would have been shut up in some house for weeks if I was going through all that. Or at least let someone know! **


	21. No Air

Chapter Twenty one- No air

He waited for me to speak and I felt my lungs restricting.

"Are you alright?" he asked concerned and I nodded swallowing hard.

"I'm ready Spot."

"Ready? For what?"

"I'm ready to tell you the truth." Spot's expression slowly changed and I could tell he was surprised. "You deserve to know everything." I continued wondering where I was finding the courage to speak.

"Vaudeville…you don't have to-"

"No. I have to." I looked around for a few seconds until I spotted a bench across the street. "You may want to sit down for this." I slipped my shaking hand into his and pulled him towards the seat.

"What happened?" he asked and I pushed him down before seating myself next to him. "Did something happen that made you want to tell me?" I nodded my head and took his other hand now.

"Spot just promise me you'll hear me out. I mean completely out no matter what."

"I promise." He responded rather hastily. I took a deep breath and nodded.

"I met you once before." I began and I saw his eyebrows knit together in confusion.

"When?"

"Central Park…before your family's murder." I didn't wait for him to reply but quickly started speaking. "Seth told his men that we were pulling off a new job two years later. He had picked your family because your father was wealthy and he hadn't been succeeding in his recent jobs. I didn't want to come but he forced me and before I knew it I was standing by the window in the dining room watching the massacre." Spot's face had lost all emotion and he stared blankly away from me. His hands slid out of my grip and he clenched them into fists. My breathing became heavy and warm as tears fell down my cheeks. "I had the papers that Seth wanted and I ran taking them with me. I thought that if I hid them and didn't give them to him it would be an apology to you and your family." I noticed Spot clench his jaw but still he said nothing. He sat motionless and for a moment I wondered if he were breathing. "They beat me but I still didn't give them the papers. Then you found me…Spot you saved me! I'm sorry for what happened but please forgive me…I love you." Swiftly he stood and turned his back to me. Both his hands were still clamped into fists. "Spot?" He began moving forward and I scrambled to follow him. "Spot?!"

"Don't." he said his voice calm and even. "Don't follow me."

"Please Spot just tell me what you think of me."

"I don't think anything of you."

"Do you forgive me?"

"Why didn't you stop him?" I was surprised that he could speak so smoothly while I was beginning to fall apart. I knew that he was going to leave me. He was walking away from me never to return. If told him about our child it would only hurt him more. There was nothing to tie Spot to me now and I knew I had to let him go.

"I tried."

"_Tried_?" I finally heard emotion in Spot's tone. "You _tried_?"

"What could I have done? Died with them?"

"Yes Sherry!" he screamed turning towards me. His mask he had attempted to keep had obviously broken and I could see past his defenses. "You should have died with them! I should have died with them!" His voice was cracking and I reached towards him. He slapped my hands away and grabbed my forearms. "You think that hiding those papers was an apology? A way to atone for what you did? Is that what you think?" He gritted his teeth.

"Spot." I breathed and he let me go. "I'm sorry." The moment I had uttered those words I felt the impact of Spot's hand. I felt as if the world had stopped turning and everyone and everything had grown silent. Shakily I cupped my hand against my cheek and turned wide eyed towards Spot. I couldn't control the tears or how bad I was shaking. Spot was once more expressionless as his own tears created neat streaks on his face.

"Goodbye Sherry." He said his voice strained.

"I know you don't mean that Spot." I whispered. Before I could reach out to him again he turned and ran. "Spot!" I screamed as his retreating figure disappeared. I fell back onto the bench my nails digging into my face. The place where he had slapped me still stung but it wasn't near as painful as what I was feeling inside. My heart was breaking and I couldn't stop it. The shaking had grown worse and I could barely breathe through the sobs. For a moment I was sure that I would faint again and eventually lose the baby. Suddenly I felt two arms wrap around me and my thoughts jumped to Spot. My eyes shot open only to find that it wasn't Spot who was holding me but Jack. "Jack…" I mumbled and I saw the concern in his eyes. "I…" he shushed me and pulled me closer to him. I began to cry harder if possible as Jack soothed me. Slowly I drifted into a dreamless sleep.

Spot's POV

I ran until I could barely feel my body. Clutching my aching side I fell against the wall. My hand ran over my cap and I pulled it off throwing it into the street. I watched as a carriage ran over it. Closing my eyes I thought back to the last time I had seen my parents. I had run away and hadn't been home for two years. My father and I had never agreed on anything and the day I met Sherry in the park I had decided to tell him how I truly felt. The story of how she lived convinced me that I didn't want to be a slave in my father's household. I didn't want to own his large business and ignore the city I lived in or the people that suffered on the streets everyday. It was the streets that called to me, that coaxed me into leaving my life caked with ignorance, bliss and luxury. Coincidentally the day I had chosen to visit them after so long had been the same night Seth murdered them. The last thing I had said to my father and mother raced through my mind.

_The house looked exactly the same to Ian Conlon as he made his way towards the back. Slowly he pushed open the door and entered. It was silent as he crept along the hall towards the living room he knew they would be in. As he predicted his family was seated comfortably in front of the large fire place. Gerald, his father, was reading from a book. It had always been part of his nightly routine. He had the same stern yet gentle face and his lips were moving as he quietly read the words in front of him. Fiona, his sister, was smiling like usual her favorite stuffed animal sitting in her lap as she said 'go fish.' Ellen, his mother, was also smiling the firelight making her seem otherworldly as her slender fingers gracefully picked up another card. If it had been two years ago Ian would have been sitting near the window his expression grim as his mother attempted to convince him to join in. Now as he watched the happy family he wondered if it had been for the best that he disappeared from their lives. He was never supposed to live the calm innocent life his sister would grow up in. She didn't long for the dangers and uncertainties that being the infamous Spot Conlon faced everyday. Why he had come back now was still unknown to him but he knew he didn't wish to stay. The uneasiness and undeserving feelings he used to feel when he lived here surged through his veins. _

_Suddenly his blue eyes met his mother's soft brown ones and the calm sensation in the room turned to tension and surprise. _

"_Ian!" she exclaimed as she dropped her cards and swiftly stood. Moving as quickly as she could in the long gown she was wearing she embraced her son. Ian closed his eyes as he breathed in the old scent of his mother. "Oh Ian where on earth have you been?!" her voice still loud and surprised. She pulled away to study her first born and could feel the tears slide down her cheeks. "Why did you ever leave?" she whispered once again hugging him. _

"_I had to." He replied and she released him. It was obvious she didn't understand his response and the masks he had developed hid his true emotions as his eyes rested on his father. They both had the same blue gaze and he could tell that he was not going to embrace him like his mother. _

"_Are you planning on coming home?" he inquired his voice hard and strained. As Ian's eyes swept the room he saw his sisters face. She also was crying and in a matter of seconds her tiny arms were tightly wrapped around his waist. He hesitantly rested his hands on her shoulders as she pleaded for him to stay. Ian knew that he wasn't coming home, he knew he didn't want to stay. Not even his seven year old sister could convince him. _

"_I'm not coming back." He responded and his mother placed her hand over her mouth. _

"_Ian." She said quietly continuing to cry. _

"_Then why did you come here?" his father's voice was venomous. Ian narrowed his eyes. _

"_I'm not sure." _

"_Don't come back to this home to torture us. We haven't seen you for two years and now you decide to show us the son we lost? Is this revenge for my attempts at trying to make you a man? We love you Ian and continue to love you. No matter how much distance and time you put between us you will always be Ian Conlon, and always be my son." It was the speech that he couldn't take and as he pried Fiona away from him he exited the house with the last parting words of, "Screw you." _

I opened my eyes and noticed the sun had begun to set. If only I had said something better, something caring, my mother and father wouldn't have died believing their son had never cared about them. The truth was that I did love them, I loved them very much and now I would never have a chance to tell them. I had told myself that I would never regret my decision for leaving them.

I wasn't truly angry at Sherry I was more upset with myself. I was upset that I had betrayed them and left them to die. Sherry wasn't the one that had murdered them it was Seth. He destroyed more than just my family but he had destroyed Sherry as well, I had destroyed Sherry. There was nothing I was more skilled at than destroying.

Vaudeville's POV

I slipped the few coins I had made selling into Jack's hand. He stared at me through gentle eyes and I felt myself cringe.

"I know it's not enough…" he shook his head and I noticed that he was looking at me with pity.

"Vaudeville its fine."

"I'm leaving tomorrow." I whispered as I closed the door to Pirate's old room. Lowering myself onto the bed I thought of Spot. I wondered where he would be at this moment and whether he was alright. Holding my stomach I smiled inwardly. I had devised a plan a few days earlier on how exactly I was going to finish what I had with Seth. He wanted me dead and he wanted the papers. Normally I would have sacrificed myself already but now I had a baby to think about and it wouldn't be fair if it died because of my past. Slowly pulling myself off of the bed I fell to my knees and pushed the mattress aside. Underneath were the still dirty documents I had recovered from the alley. I snatched them and returned them to my pocket. Then once I had regained my balance and fixed the mattress I fell onto it and went to sleep.

Navy's POV

"She knows Spot isn't injured." I told Seth at one of our many meetings. Hell Raiser had accompanied me so he could receive the whole story and seemed amused. I heard him laugh slightly and I attempted to ignore him.

"Then we have to find another way." He replied his eyes narrowing.

"How about I just go find the doll, kill 'er, and then bring the body to ya?" Hell Raiser suggested smugly. "I mean I may be the most experienced murderer in this room." I could tell Seth didn't seem elated with Hell Raiser's ego and I shook my head.

"I want to kill her myself." Seth said through gritted teeth.

"Oh is this one of those love affairs?" I elbowed Hell Raiser in the arm quickly. He turned to me and smirked before slouching farther in his chair.

"Maybe we should let Hell Raiser find 'er boss…and then we could meet up with him." Slims squeaked from behind Seth. We turned to face him and I saw Seth nod his head.

"I like that idea…how bout that huh?" I shrugged deciding it was a better plan than any.

"So Hell Raiser?" I asked watching him stand and light a cigarette.

"Consider her found. Where do ya want me to bring her?"

"Here is good." Seth responded referring to the new bar we seemed to have established as headquarters.

"Should I bring that Spot bastard along too?" Hell Raiser turned to me waiting for a reply.

"No. I'll lure Spot in myself."

"You said I could help ya kill him." I could hear the sudden distrust and anger in Raiser's voice and I smiled.

"Yeah and you will. Believe me he'll follow me first before he followed you." Hell Raiser reluctantly nodded and left to fulfill his part of the plan. Seth glanced in my direction and I shook his extended hand. "It seems you're drawing closer to what you've been waiting for." I said pulling on my cap.

"I can't wait to kill that bitch. She lied to me and gave me those damn fakes." He replied venomously.

"I'll see you tomorrow." Before Seth could say anything more I slipped out the bar.

It was slightly chilly outside as I walked through the streets. There was no specific place I was heading and I felt a twang of loneliness. Josephine, my lover, had walked with me many times before her death and I smiled as I thought about her dark hair and brown eyes. As I thought about her I remembered Father John had informed me that her mother Maratha was ill. I looked around to get an idea of where I was and then changed directions towards where Josephine used to live.

I could hear the cries of babies as I climbed the stairs to the third floor. Maratha's building was chosen to be demolished by the city and most of the tenants refused to leave. An officer brushed past me holding the hand of a little boy. Sighing I shook my head as I stopped in front of Maratha's apartment. The city had sent in reinforcements to evacuate the people that lived here and inside I could feel disgust at the heartlessness and cruelty the government had towards people of low social status. Closing my eyes I knocked hoping Maratha didn't look to sickly.

"Navy?" I opened my eyes and smiled. My hopes hadn't come true for Maratha looked extremely ill. Her long gray hair was hanging in her pale and sunken in face. She had lost a huge amount of weight and I sighed.

"Good evening. How are you feeling?" I inquired and her dark eyes seemed to light up at the sound of my voice.

"Come in!" she exclaimed and stepped aside to let me pass. Her home was obviously not packed and I looked to my left where Josephine's room used to be. The door was wide open and as far as I could tell nothing had been touched. Maratha shuffled to the small kitchen and searched through cupboards. "I'm sorry Navy I don't really have anything to eat."

"Don't worry about it Mrs. Marcelo." I replied standing awkwardly in the living room. She turned and gestured towards the kitchen table.

"I've told you many times just to call me Maratha." I nodded and pulled out a chair for her before sitting down myself. "So, how have you been?" she asked.

"Alright, but you never answered my question." She sighed and shifted in her chair. Suddenly I felt as if she looked very small and weak. I suppressed the urge to hug her tightly and tell her everything would be okay.

"I've been better." She smiled and I quickly returned it. "Father John visited me awhile ago and told me he had seen you. Personally I was very surprised to hear that you've been working so much." I rolled my eyes.

"Yes. I need the money."

"Whatever for?" I shrugged and turned away from her as I began to feel uncomfortable. She rested her bony hand on mine and my head snapped back to her direction. "You're not still after that Conlon boy are you?" I felt my heart sink at the pain that was creeping into her expression.

"Why do you ask?" I replied trying to keep my voice calm. She sighed and pulled her hand way fixing the shawl around her shoulders.

"Navy he didn't mean to…hurt Josie." I swallowed hard at the nickname we had once called Josephine.

"I don't believe that." I said pulling off my cap and twisting it in my hands. "He knew she was there, he was completely aware."

"How can you say that?" Maratha inquired her voice shaking. "Josie was in the wrong place at the wrong time Navy. That poor Conlon boy had personally confronted me after her funeral and apologized. He took it upon himself." I clenched my teeth. She noticed my rigid posture and stood stumbling towards the counter. I jumped up but she waved me away from her. "If I can find it in my heart to forgive…then I do not understand why you can't." I firmly pulled my cap back on.

"Only good people can forgive."

"Navy!" she turned to me and took my clenched fist. "You are a good person!" I could feel my chest tighten at her words. She had no idea of what I was planning to do, or who I was spending all my time with. I had been lying and deceiving Spot and Sherry and soon they would be just as dead as I felt at this moment.

"If you need anything tell Father John. I promise he'll give me the message and I'll come help you." My voice was monotone now and she could tell that something was wrong.

"Navy before you go can you promise me something?" I stared at her and she seemed desperate. "Please don't do whatever you're planning. Josie wouldn't want to see you hurt someone else. Forgiveness will set you free." Her voice was pleading with me and inhaled sharply. "If anything Navy…promise me you'll rethink it?" I nodded and I felt her press something into my palm. I glanced down and saw an extremely familiar object. Josephine's ring was still clean and polished. I looked back up to see Maratha crying and I smiled weakly.

"I'll visit you soon." She nodded and I exited. Carefully I placed the ring in my shirt pocket as I dashed down the stairs. I had forgotten to ask her why she wasn't moving and I made a note to inform Father John. Once I had gotten as far as I could from Maratha's home I slowed down and plopped down on a Central Park bench. I hadn't realized how emotionally exhausted I felt. Squeezing my eyes shut I willed myself not to fall apart as I considered rethinking my plans. No matter what kind of person I believed I was I still kept my promises.

**A/n: This took me forever to write and I'm very sorry. Multiple incidents happened that just seemed to keep me from updating. I was very sad when I wrote this chapter, but when I went back to edit it I feel like this really isn't my best writing. I also found that in some parts my story contradicts itself and my timing is off. So I might be spending a lot of time going back over this whole story and editing it before I update again. I just thought I would warn you guys if it takes me another month of sundays to update. I just feel like I should do that before I complete it. Plus it will be a review on what I've previously written and help me out so that my next chapter will be a better read for ya'll. It might also make some more sense if everythings right on time. haha. Thank you so much for your reviews and support!**


	22. Fix you

**A/n: Hello all! So it seriously has been a very long while since Vaudeville and Spot's story has been continued. So here is an extremely short update that is only three pages long, but very neccessary for me to put up. I decided that I would show you all that I have not given up on writing this, I've only been going through all 21 chapters and 102 pages I have written so that I could edit it and make sense of the my writing. I changed things throughout the story but nothing major. So before you read this wonderful chapter I would suggest and strongly urge for ya'll to re read these chapters:**

**Chapter fifteen- Just the flashback, but you can read the whole thing if you please. I changed the time everything happened. Read when Vaude first sees Tommy because the time since she has seen him has changed as well. Thank you!**

**Chapter seventeen- Flashback only. Nothing changed but you need to re read if for chap. 21.**

**Chapter 21- Okay, I entirely re wrote Spot's POV so that everything fit. I will have another thing to say about 21 after ya'll read 22. Thank you! **

Chapter Twenty two- Fix you

"Stay there." I nodded weakly towards the man who had claimed he was working for Seth. He seemed surprised when I informed him that I willingly wished to go with him and forcefully escorting me would be unnecessary. In my hand I held the papers Seth wanted and I took a deep breath. I wondered vaguely if I was going to leave this bar alive. If I did I promised myself I would never come into the vicinity again. "Come on." The man snapped grabbing my arm and pulling me along with him. Seth was smiling as he leaned against the wall in front of me.

"So is today pay day?" he inquired when the man had released me.

"Depends." I replied and he narrowed his eyes.

"On what?"

"I want to make another deal with you." He pushed himself off of the wall and sauntered towards me.

"You think I wanna make a deal with you?" I continued to be silent as he stopped his face inches from mine. "You've caused me a lot of trouble Sherry."

"I'll give you the papers if you give me my life." He began laughing hysterically and stepped away from me. I clenched my teeth and waited until he was finished.

"That's great." He snickered crossing his arms. "I don't think that can be arranged."

"Why not?"

"I'm tired of makin' deals I just want what I want. I've waited a long time for this."

"No!" I screamed turning to escape once more. My path was blocked by the man who had found me earlier. I attempted to push past him without over exerting myself but obviously failed. He pulled my arms behind me and went to slam me against the wall when I put my foot out in front of me. I felt an extreme pain and I screamed once more. The man was surprised and stumbled away from the wall at my shrieks.

"What the hell!?" Seth growled as he came to examine what the commotion was about.

"Please," I gasped, "I'm pregnant." Seth's eyes widened and once more I heard the hysterical laughter.

"Sherry's got herself knocked up!" he yelled pointing in my direction. "I can only guess who the father is!" The man who was holding my arms turned me to face him.

"Conlon's the dad?" he asked and I nodded slowly. Seth smirked as he heard who the designated father was.

"That's perfect."

"Seth let me live…for my baby."

"Does Conlon know you're about to kill yourself and his kid?" Seth asked and I closed my eyes. My silence was enough of an answer. "Pathetic." Seth mumbled and I looked towards him.

"Maybe we should let 'er go boss, I mean she has a kid." Seth spun around.

"Shut up Slims! We ain't gonna let her live! We've killed kids before!" Slims shrunk under his leader's glare and I felt fresh tears fall from my eyes.

"Seth please!" I screamed beginning to struggle in my holder's grasp. "I'll give you what you want if you let me go!" Seth moved closer and grasped my chin tilting my head to look at him.

"I want you dead Sherry. End of conversation."

Navy's POV

Spot was leaning against the railing on the Brooklyn Bridge. He seemed to be lost in thought and didn't notice me approach him. I stood behind him for a long minute and my own thoughts began to stray.

_"Jeez Navy you'd think you held a grudge against the newsies." Navy shrugged and turned his attention to the book in front of him. "I personally see nothing wrong with them!" _

"_They're liars Josie! All of them!" _

"_And what did they lie about?" He looked up into his girlfriend's innocent eyes. _

"_You have too much faith in people." _

"_And you have too little." He smiled and rested his hand on her cheek. She grinned and placed her own hand on top of his. "You know I love people. I want to help them. I want to do all I can." I nodded finally pulling away from her. _

"_That's what I love about you." Swiftly she stood from the table they had been sitting at and swooped down to kiss him. "Don't forget about tonight, I have a present for you." She laughed. _

"_I'll see you later then." She whispered in his ear. As she made her way towards the church door he turned and called out to her. _

"_I love you Josie!" As she met his gaze her brown eyes softened. He felt his stomach churn as an odd feeling surged through his veins. It was as if when Josephine stepped out that door he would never hear her voice again. _

"_I love you too Navy." She responded blowing him a kiss. The church door closed and the feeling he felt quickly turned to loneliness as he heard nothing but silence. _

"_Bastard!" the boy cursed as he held his bloody arm. The man smirked clenching the knife he had just used. _

"_You will die Conlon." He snarled moving forward at a fast speed. Spot turned and made his way from the alley and towards the street. As he turned the corner to escape the man he felt himself make impact with something. _

"_You're bleeding!" he heard whoever he had stumbled into exclaim. He looked up into a pair of concerned brown eyes as she reached for his arm. _

"_Conlon!" the man screamed as he also made his way around the corner. _

"_Shit." Spot mumbled as he began pushing the girl aside. In a matter of seconds and one unfortunate mistake Spot had pushed her in front of him. The man had already moved forward to strike and in one motion the knife meant for Spot sunk itself into the young girl's chest. Blood seeped out of her mouth as she attempted a scream. The man seemed startled and released the handle of his weapon and stumbled backwards. Spot's mouth fell open and he tumbled to the ground the girl on top of him. She was gurgling as she tried to speak and he felt himself begin to shake. "I-I don't know what to do." He said pushing her off of him. "Help!" he screamed positioning himself to stand when he felt her fingers clasp his wrist. His face contorted into a strange mixture of disgust, fear, and guilt as she once more tried to speak. _

"_Navy…" she sputtered and gently her fingers fell from Spot. He felt himself stop breathing as he watched the light in her eyes cease to exist. Navy fell to the ground at what he had witnessed. The reason he was living had died and there was nothing he could do to fix her. _

"Navy?" I shook my head and saw that Spot had detected my presence. Suddenly his expression became blank but his eyes held rage. "I heard you." He said and I shook away the memories.

"Heard me?"

"You've been betraying me this whole time." I smirked and regained my composure.

"This is nothing compared to what you've done to me." Spot's expression continued to remain blank. "Do you remember the young girl that you pushed in front of you? The young girl you sacrificed so you could survive?" His eyes widened and slowly he turned away from me.

"So you're that Navy." It was more of a statement than a question. He began to laugh and my eyes became slits.

"I don't see the humor."

"She's another thing I've destroyed." Suddenly he spun to completely face me. His masks had disappeared and his gaze was intense. I was startled by this and stepped back. It was rare to see the infamous Brooklyn leader to be open and honest outwardly to any situation that crossed his path. "So? What are you gonna do to me?" I felt my head begin to pound and the emotions I had kept buried inside after Josephine's funeral seemed to reach the brim of everything I could handle. He was facing something I couldn't face. Spot Conlon was taking responsibility something I could never do. I had always pretended like everything was okay and the only person who had brought me to my senses was Josephine. Now as I monotonously told Spot to follow me I was doing the one thing I promised Maratha I would do. I was rethinking. Not just what I wanted to do to Spot, but what I was allowing Seth to do to Sherry. He was going to kill her and I was going to kill Spot. This was the plan. The one thing that had been in motion since the moment I had agreed to become Spot's birdie, and the moment Sherry had hidden from Seth. Spot said that Josephine was another thing he had destroyed. Even if he believed he destroyed things the true destroyers in this twisted reality was only two people Me and Seth.

**A/n: I know another one! **

**21- Just in case you're wondering. The flashback in chap. 17 as you might know already, Ellen Spot's mama said where's Ian because she thought he might have still been around or in the house when the attackers came. Because basically they showed up oddly enough after Spot was like 'I hate you dad.' So that's why she said that, and the dad wasn't sure where he was either and was hushing her up so that Ian would live. Anyway! I love Spot's family and I'm very sad that I killed them because I could write a whole story just about Spot's life before the streets. I'm not fond of his dad but he means well. Besides that Spot had been walking around after he visited his family and that's how he found Sherry in the alley. He saw the guys run away but he of course had no idea that any of that was connected to him. **

**There is my authorly insight for you guys. That's everything that I had to edit and make clear because I hadn't before. Awesomness if you guys realized all this before I made the corrections. I guess I had to realize it myself. So now that I've made my author notes longer than my update I think we can all move on and figure out what the heck is gonna happen!! **

**PS. I love Navy and I could write a whole story about him too. Because before he became all angsty and life sucks he was awesome, and Josephine despite that she's goody goody I love her too. She's the complete opposite of me with all her optomisim. But I love her just the same. I wanna hear your guys thoughts on Josie now that ya'll have technically met her. Basically on everything. REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW! **


	23. Watch me bleed

Chapter Twenty three- Watch me bleed

Vaudeville's POV

I had been trying to protect myself from Seth's blows but it was to no avail. Holding my stomach tightly I turned my face to the side as he punched me once more. He had explained that he wanted to make me bleed until I was broken. Obviously he cared nothing for the child that I so badly wanted to live. Slowly I slid to the ground and took in a ragged breath. My tears blinded me as my eyes began to sting.

"Seth." I mumbled and I felt him kick my broken foot.

"Come on boss…let's just kill 'er." I heard Slims say and I heard Seth laugh.

"Yeah kill her already!" the man I now knew as Hell Raiser yelled.

"Fine, pass me the gun." I heard shuffling noises and then the click from Seth's weapon of choice. I could barely breathe as I felt the cold metal press against my forehead. "This was fun while it lasted." Seth commented.

"Sherry!" the pressure of the gun left my head and I opened my eyes to see two figures struggling. Everything was so sudden I had no time for anything to register. The gun shot echoed off the small space we were in. As I shakily pulled myself up I saw Seth stumbling away from the body on the ground. He was holding the gun with two hands and staring at the puddle of blood that was beginning to pool around his victim. Finally my vision returned and I found myself on my knees. My breathing grew heavy and the world had stopped moving. I crawled towards him and pushed his arm so that he would roll onto his back. His face was blank and his eyes were fixed on something I could not see.

"Spot?" I whimpered trying to find the wound that the blood was pouring from. "Answer me Spot." I said again hoping to hear his voice. My shaking hands cupped his face and I couldn't accept what was in front of me. There was no possible way that he could be gone. "Please." There was no response. "PLEASE!" I began to hysterically scream. I noticed nothing and no one around me. Seth gritted his teeth as he watched the scene in front of him. Hell Raiser had disappeared after the gun shot and the only ones still present was Navy and his men.

Navy's POV

I stared blankly as I listened to Sherry's shrieks. My eyes traced the limp body of Spot Conlon and rested on the dark red blood. I wasn't the one in the end who had made him bleed, I was the one watching. My heart constricted as Sherry's head fell onto his chest. Her screams had died away and instead she was sobbing each one shaking her body. I couldn't help but relate to how she felt at this moment. Her reaction would have been mine if I was able to breathe when Josephine had been murdered. Finally I shifted my gaze to Seth who had his gun raised and aimed at Sherry. _You know I love people. I want to help them. I want to do all I can. _Josephine's voice rang in my mind and quickly I reached into my pocket and retrieved my own hand gun. I was a faster draw than Seth and before his finger pulled the trigger that held the bullet to end Sherry's life I ended his. Sherry jumped and I saw her heard snap in Seth's direction. My bullet had pierced the flesh where his heart would be and with a jerk he fell to the ground. Seth's men stared wide eyed at their leader's lifeless body and ran from the back of the alley. I dropped my gun the sudden adrenaline rush I felt when I killed him disappearing as I walked towards Sherry.

"It's over." I murmured kneeling next to her. Her brown eyes met my gaze and I could see the unexplainable pain reflecting back. "He's dead."

"Why?" she asked her voice husky. I stared as she turned back to Spot who still hadn't moved. His blood had covered her hands and I rested my clean ones on her shoulders. "Why did Seth shoot him Navy?" she said again sounding as if she was beginning to lose her mind. "I should have told him…I should have…" she pushed me off of her and positioned herself next to him. "Spot?" she whispered and I knew the only thing I could do was watch. "I'm pregnant." I could hear the tears were about to start again. "Isn't that wonderful?" she paused trying to control herself. "Spot?" I felt more pain than I had since Josephine as I continued to be a bystander to this injustice. "I promise that I'll raise this baby for you okay? I promise not to let anything happen to us." She pushed herself away from him and I saw her hand rest on his cheek a faint smile on her face. I noticed that she pulled something from around his neck and enclosed it in her hand. "I'm sorry I couldn't save you this time." I saw more tears. "I'm sorry I couldn't save your family." She turned to me with a strange determination in her eyes. "Can you help me up Navy?" I nodded and held onto her arms as she shakily stood. "I love you." She whispered staring down at his face. She turned and began stumbling forward and as I went to help her for one moment swore that I saw Spot move. Shaking the thought from my mind we exited the bar after we were positive the police and medical professionals would handle the bodies.

Vaudeville's POV

My window on the train was slightly opened and I smiled as the scenery flashed by. I reached up and ran my finger over the smooth metal of Spot's key. Navy had given me money for a train ticket and without warning to anyone or news of what happened to Spot's body I jumped on the next train out west. Besides Alice and her family there was no reason for me to stay in New York City. I had to raise my child in another environment and I wasn't sure if I could handle constant reminders of Spot. Even now I was surprised I could hold myself together enough to travel and I wondered if it was because I had another human being to care about. I hadn't felt any complications and I hoped that I hadn't injured my child in any way.

"California!" I heard the train conductor scream as the train screeched to a stop. I stood carefully and pulled down my suitcase. Following the last remaining people on the train I stepped down onto the platform. Pirate had no idea I was coming and I pondered the expression on her face when I knocked on her front door. I also wondered what she would look like when she heard the sad news.

The waiting room at the small train station was practically empty as I stood at the ticket window.

"Excuse me!?" I called my eyes scanning for any sign of life. The other passengers on the train had already dispersed and I was the only one left.

"May I help you?" A man in his early forties asked stopping in front of me. I smiled warmly and he returned it.

"Yes I was wondering if you could tell me how to get here?" I pushed the paper with Pirate's address towards him. His eyes moved across the words and he smiled broadly.

"Ah yes Ethan!" then he rested his gaze on me. "Are you a family member perhaps?"

"I'm a friend of Emma-"

"Yes Emma! Wonderful girl, they recently married at the new church." My expression was clearly surprised and he laughed. "One minute." He motioned towards an old woman and she nodded exiting through the back door. "I'll have Jeffery give you a ride out there. It's a rather long walk." He said chuckling. I nodded my thanks as he told me where to wait.

Ethan's ranch was rather large as we neared the entrance. Large as it was the land was beautiful. There were horses grazing behind a brown log fence and cows in another pasture. The house was also large and wooden standing slightly higher than the stables and barn. As Jeffery stopped the carriage in front of the home three dogs bounded towards us barking. I smiled slightly feeling that this was a much different lifestyle than the one Pirate used to live. It was peaceful and perfect to raise a family. I was sure the small town that Jeffery told me about knew everyone by name and treated anyone like family.

"Here it is missy." The man said helping me down.

"Thank you so much." I responded digging in my purse. He held his hand up assuming that I was going to pay him.

"The ride was free of charge. I personally will do any favor for the nice Johnson family that lives here." I nodded and turned to the dogs that were now sniffing the hem of my dress.

"Why hello there Jeffery!" I heard the familiar voice of Ethan and I hoped he wouldn't mind my barging in. Ethan was coming from the barn yet another dog at his heels as he made his way towards us.

"Hello Ethan, I brought this young lady over. She says she's a friend of yours." Ethan smiled broadly when he saw me and patted me on the shoulder.

"I didn't expect to see you so soon Sherry, Emma's in the house!" I nodded and grabbed my suitcase making my way towards the home. Inside Pirate was standing near a stove stirring something that smelled wonderful. An elderly woman sat at the kitchen table shelling peas and jabbering away about recipes. I wondered who she could be as I set my suitcase down. It made a loud noise and I saw Pirate jump slightly as she rested the wooden spoon she had been stirring with aside.

"Ethan I hope that's not you makin' loud noises!" she snapped wiping her hands on her apron and turning towards me. Her expression abruptly changed from aggravation to surprise as she leapt forward and wrapped her arms around me. "Vaudeville!" I returned the hug feeling fresh tears at my name. I wished so desperately that it had been Spot saying it. "Lordie sakes what are you doin' here?" I grabbed her wrist and gave her a look that said 'we need to talk now.' She nodded her understanding and turned to the old woman who looked shocked. "Uh, Mama Johnson this is my best friend Sherry she lives in New York and we'll be right back okay?" the woman nodded and I pulled Pirate into the next empty room I could find. "Vaude what's wrong?" she asked concerned. I turned to her and sighed deeply. In ten minutes I had explained everything that had happened in the week or so that I hadn't seen her. Her expression was blank when I finished and slowly she hugged me once more. "I'm so sorry Vaude." She whispered and I closed my eyes.

"Pirate…may I live with you? I thought this might be a wonderful environment to raise my child and…" I trailed off deciding it was best I stop talking until I was completely over everything.

"Of course you can Vaudeville! I would never tell you to leave. What's mine is yours."

"You don't think Ethan will mind?" She smirked and scratched her head.

"I don't know for sure, but I don't understand why he would say no." I chuckled and for the first time I felt secure and safe. After all I had promised Spot that I would raise this baby.

Life with Pirate had fallen into a normal and easy routine. Ethan had reluctantly agreed to allow me to live with them and I thoroughly enjoyed it. It was amazing to believe that I had been here for six months. The ranch was a wonderful place and the doctor I had met to deliver my child was kind and caring. She was more of a midwife but she had informed me that she didn't believe there were any complications with my baby. So life for me moved on as I attempted to deal with my days Spotless. It was hard but slowly I was trying to become strong, very slowly.

"Sher you got some mail." Pirate called up the steps. She had gotten into the habit of calling me Sherry instead of Vaudeville and I was extremely thankful. I wasn't sure if I would have been able to handle any reminders of the newsies. Gently I descended the stairs and made my way to the kitchen where one lone envelope was waiting for me. I ripped it open and pulled out the letter that was inside.

_Dear Sherry,_

_I thought that I would write to you asking you how you are doing. I'm okay and slowly I've begun to get my life together. No longer am I seeking revenge against anyone or anything and I sincerely have you and Spot to thank for that. I never thought I would write those words, let alone believe them but I do now. I hope you and Pirate are living comfortably. Things have changed slowly here in New York but I don't believe I should tell you in writing. _

_Once your baby is born please come and visit me here. Plus I know your sister would very much love to see her niece or nephew. _

_Once again I thank you and I hope all is well. _

_Navy_

I smiled and folded the paper. Slipping it back into the envelope I was happy that he didn't mention too much of Spot. I didn't believe I would be able to handle anything of his death because even now I didn't accept it. I had ended up like Sam the old lonely woman that lived in the country. She had warned me but I didn't believe that would happen to me. The only plus side to everything I had been through was that I was now eight months pregnant and had a child from the man I loved. "Who was it from?" Pirate asked when she noticed my expression.

"Navy."

"What did he want?" I had told her that he had changed his ways and I remembered how surprised she had been.

"Nothing important, anyway let's get started on dinner." She nodded and I shoved the letter into my apron pocket along with my old life.

**A/n: Wow. I can't believe that this is the end of One Way Ticket. I've been working on this story forever and every time I get on the computer I feel empty because I have nothing to write, nothing to add to Sherry, Spot, or Navy. At least for now. evil grin haha. **

**Anyway, I hope you guys enjoyed taking this journey with my characters and with me. **

**I want to thank every single one of my reviewers for sticking with me, and for the constructive criticism I was given. I believe it really helped me grow stronger as a writer. So I hope we meet again! **

** Morbidlyartistic**


	24. Epilouge

**A/n: I bet you guys are like..."What this girl is crazy! She just told us the story was over and here she is like four days later updating the thing!" But anyways, despite my craziness I wrote this. I was going to possibly write a 'sequel' but my idea seemed unrealistic, Thanks to Vertigo Showgirl for her input! Then I thought, well there's really no need for one because I can just summarize everything I was going to write in that one in an Epilogue. So here it is. This is basically all my ideas in one and half pages. Plus it's happy and I enjoyed writing it.**

**So now I think I can move on. I tied up everything I didn't originally put like what their kid is like. What happens to everyone etc. But Thank you to Newsie luver because you gave me the idea ahaha. **

Epilogue-

I smirked as I studied myself in the mirror. By my appearance things had definitely changed. My silky blonde hair had been twisted into an elegant hairstyle and my eyes were older and more mature. There was no way to fight against the future and I had grown up into a responsible adult. Eight years ago it would be hard to believe that I would be standing here dressed in this beautiful white dress.

"Sherry hurry up!" Pirate called through the door.

"Yeah I'll be there." I responded sighing as my eyes looked towards the ceiling. My smirked turned into a smile as I thought about him. Something I did everyday, sometimes without knowing I was. It wasn't as painful as before to remember his face, or his eyes, or our memories. Now though I could feel myself forgetting the way his voice sounded but that was natural. He was stuck in time and I was moving forward and I had slowly come to accept that.

"Mama!" I turned and bent down to become level with the eight year old. She had qualities that both Spot and I shared. Her hair was blonde like mine, yet her eyes were just as blue and piercing as his had once been. I knew that when she was older she would most likely pick up his personality. Even now she showed signs of the short temper. "Aunt Emma is complaining that you'll be late!" I laughed and rolled my eyes. Her face softened as she studied me. "Were you thinking about Daddy?" she inquired her voice almost in a whisper. I nodded and hugged her.

"But don't worry I'm fine." Standing she nodded smiling and I gestured towards a basket of flowers. "Mandie, don't forget that." She grabbed the basket and disappeared. Quickly since I heard the music begin I pulled the white veil over my face and with one last fleeting glance at the mirror slipped out of the room.

The church wasn't full of people, something I expected, but everyone that counted was there. Ethan was standing in the second row holding the hand of his and Pirate's two children, one a girl and the other a boy. I smiled as I glided down the aisle towards the new person that had captured my broken heart. He smiled warmly, a smile I learned to love. Of course he would never replace Spot but there was no point in me wallowing in self pity and depression. He helped me realize this. Mandie stood aside with her Aunt Emma and I winked at her as she waved slightly. Turning I stood facing my soon to be husband Navy. It was odd in some way that we would fall in love. The two people who had lost someone so dear and close to them they thought they would never move on. Together we changed, and now together we would be always. He understood me and I understood him. Mandie had also took a liking to him and she came first.

Father John seemed ecstatic as he read from his book. I was nervous and I closed my eyes briefly as Navy slipped the ring onto my finger. According to Maratha, who Navy called mom, the ring was supposed to be her daughter's Josephine. Navy had reassured me she wouldn't have minded if I now wore it and reluctantly I allowed him to use it. Maratha who had fully recovered from her illness was going to live with us once Navy and I got settled.

"You may kiss the bride." Father John said ending our ceremony. My arms encircled Navy's neck as he leaned in and sealed our commitment. A small part of me wished it was Spot I was binding myself to for eternity but I knew that was impossible. I loved Navy, and I was fine with that. Turning we moved down the aisle holding hands. Mandie had caught up and was on my left while Navy was on my right. I could hear Alice crying somewhere in the front row and I rolled my eyes. Ben, who was fourteen now and quite handsome, was most likely receiving a bone crushing hug as Charlie attempted to calm his wife. I chuckled knowing that I soon would be crushed when Alice saw me at the reception. As I passed the third to last row I nodded towards Jack Kelly, now Francis Sullivan since he returned to his old name. His wife Eloise waved and I smiled. She was a beautiful girl that he had met in Santa Fe and it seemed to be fate. I had kept in contact with Jack, a name I would never stop calling him, for some time and I was happy he was there. Sam had passed away a few years ago when I had returned to New York and silently I said a prayer for her. I knew though that she was happy with her child and husband in heaven.

I stopped in front of the church and smiled at my husband and child. Still something I could hardly believe.

"Let's be together forever." I said swooping down to kiss my daughter, Mandie Ian Conlon, on the cheek.

"Of course." Navy responded squeezing my hand.

"I won't leave ya mama." Mandie said and I laughed.

"Okay, well go find Aunt Emma, okay?" She nodded and disappeared into the church as Navy and I made a quick right towards the reception hall near the back of the church. We felt we needed a moment to ourselves.

"Are you alright?" He asked and I nodded.

"Are you?" he mimicked me with a nod and I kissed him once more. "I'm happy to be with you."

"Me too." He responded holding the door open and I shook my head.

The emptiness I had felt before had ceased to exist. No longer was I lonely. I was happy I had Mandie to remind me of Spot every day, and Navy to hold me together whenever I felt as if I was about to fall apart. My life had changed and I was finally perfectly content. Nothing would bring me down, nothing could break me anymore. My eyes averted to the sky as I passed through the door and once more I thought of Spot Conlon. I would always love him. There was no doubt in my mind, just as Navy would always love Josie, but now it didn't hurt so much. Nothing would ever kill the King of Brooklyn, nothing.

**A/n: So yes Spot's dead. Very sad. But now the two characters who ended up lonely aren't anymore! YAY! **

**So now it's really over. Thank you for the reviews. Hopefully you'll read my new stuff...whenever I think of something. **

**Morbidlyartistic.**


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